SimplySxy

Category: Sex Ed

  • Improving Your Libido in Times of Stress: Our Top Tips

    Improving Your Libido in Times of Stress: Our Top Tips

    Feeling a bit sexually meh? No longer craving those intimate moments with your partner? Well, we’re here to tell you that experiencing low sex drive is completely normal. In fact, after the mess of a year we’ve had, it’s probably quite likely. So, what exactly is libido? To put it simply, libido is just a fancy way of saying sexual desire, and, before you ask, no there isn’t a correct level. Libido can change in accordance with a variety of internal and external factors including, hormone levels, sleep patterns and, yep, you guessed it, stress! With research showing a significant increase in depression, anxiety and stress since the start of the pandemic, your sudden drop in desire to get it on is only natural. But we know what you’re thinking, who cares about natural? You want to know how to reclaim your former sexual desire, how to rediscover the joy of sex. Look no further, these 4 top tips will have you back in the bedroom in no time.

    1.     Make Time For Your Mental Health

    Stress and anxiety can be overwhelming for the body and can often leave it in a state of fight or flight. As a result, the body will increase your breathing and heart rate, and decrease non-essential functions like sex drive. Therefore, looking after your mental health and decreasing stress levels is of the upmost importance when reclaiming your libido. While there are many ways to reduce stress, we suggest putting aside at least an hour a day to focus on yourself. During this hour, we highly recommend activities that strengthen the body and mind, these might include:

    • Exercise
    • Journaling
    • Reading
    • Going on walks

    Additionally, practicing relaxation techniques such as yoga or mediation may also be extremely beneficial. These can be easily implemented into your normal routine (e.g., before bed) and may help gain a better understanding of your worry or anxiety.

    2.     Establish A Good Sleep Routine

    Getting enough sleep is essential for reducing stress levels. Sometimes a hectic life can impede on your much needed beauty sleep. Balancing work, exercise, the kids, and the adored (but extremely needy) dogs can mean alot of overtime. Don’t worry, we’ve all been there. But it’s important to remember that you’re only human, and to maintain a healthy and happy life, sleep is definitely required. Not only will establishing a routine mean that you’re never too tired for sex, but it will also ensure you always have time set aside for intimacy. While we understand it can be hard to create a solid routine, we recommend trying to keep to a rough schedule and taking naps when you’re feeling particularly tired.

    3.     Masturbate More!

    Many sex and relationship therapists suggest masturbation is the key to boosting sex drive. This is mainly due to the release of dopamine (the pleasure chemical) that occurs during sexual activity. As a result, masturbation may help the body associate sex with pleasurable feeling, making it increasingly desirable. Additionally, it can help you understand exactly what turns you on, which can be beneficial information for a partner. Although masturbation may seem strange at first, there are a variety of ways to make this a fun activity and test what works for you, one of which includes live sex cams. These allow you to access sexual fantasies and desires from your home. For live sex cams look here. This site is perfect for those experienced with sex cams and those who may be completely new to it. With its wide range of models and categories, there’s no way you won’t find something that’s perfect for you! While you may decide to masturbate alone, including your partner in a free sex cam session may also be a great way to improve communication and emotional closeness, both of which are important for increasing libido.

    4.     Talk To Your Partner

    As mentioned in tip number three, communication is vital for maintaining a healthy relationship. As reported in a recent study, sexual problems are usually the result of lack of sexual communication between partners. This included topics surrounding sexual desire, orgasm, and pain. So, put down your phones and get talking! We recommend designating a time to talk to your partner about your sexual feelings and low libido and suggest working together to come up with solutions. Additionally, making sure you make time for your partner in general may help increase emotional and physical closeness, which can ease any awkwardness or anxieties you may be feeling within your relationship.

    So, while lockdown may have you feeling in a bit of a sexual ‘slump,’ just know that you’re not alone and there are a variety of options to help you reclaim that sexual desire. It’s important to note that everyone’s libido is different, and experiencing lows and highs are completely natural.

    Image courtesy of Shutterstock

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  • What Does BDSM stand for? (Part 1)

    What Does BDSM stand for? (Part 1)

    Bondage & Discipline

    Domination & Submission

    Sadism & Masochist

    These are the three core concepts when we talk about BDSM. These days there are a lot of erotic myths, bad rep and press and a massive interest, curiosity going around when BDSM comes up. It’s all because of the whole 50 Shades of Grey phenomenon. Most people assume BDSM it’s all about violence, abuse, pain, hurting the other, however this could not be further from the truth of the real BDSM (sex) experience. Kinky people use BDSM sex mainly to supplement their regular sexual life with some erotic kinky edging and bringing more sexual pleasure with some kink such as bondage, domination and submission role-play and power games.

    A lot of people seem to think that BDSM requires you to use whips, chains, handcuffs or to have extreme violence, pressured rules and sort of other weird stuff.  BDSM sex and the lifestyle is about using pleasures, sensations, mental and emotional triggers to a point where you can generate more fun, joy and europhile in your partner. During BDSM sex you learn to penetrate, awaken, and stimulate the mind of an another human being.

    During BDSM sex, it does not matter how it looks from the outside; it’s more important how it feels inside, what feelings, issues coming up during the scene. That’s why communication and aftercare are crucial.

    Domination is an art of taking control, penetrate to the other’s mind, open their deepest desires up towards more pleasure. Learn to master these skills and you will easily understand people’s deepest sexual desires and will be able to bring them to another high of sexual experience. BDSM sex can be healing for some.

    The truth is that most of us already participate in some form of BDSM in our everyday life. It could be a very light BDSM activity during your traditional sex life. Example: if you are enjoying biting, scratching or having your hair pulled or have been called dirty names during sex. Some people would already consider these activities as soft-core kink. It’s BDSM for some vanilla sex lovers.

    Some people would do the above mentioned erotic behaviours and just consider it as ‘normal’.  It’s your choice to decide what BDSM is (thought your lens to this world) and if it’s for you or not?

    BDSM could have a bad rep based on people not truly understanding it. Not understanding how some erotic activities could trigger more sensations in some people’s brain.  Why would people do certain things?

    We live in a world where we constantly need to wear masks to be ‘good enough’ for our friends, family and workplace. By the end, we forget who we are and what we need sexually to be complete. BDSM and exploring your kinky side could help you understand, open up and bring up these suppressed and ignored emotions, sexual needs, which could lead you to understand and accept yourself by the core. Pain also could be the pleasure source for some. When reading and learning about BDSM, it’s important to keep an open and non-judgmental mind at all times.

    BDSM is for anyone who dares to expand their erotic horizons beyond ordinary. BDSM is for people who like intense sensations. For those who love to dance on the line between pain and pleasure. BDSM is art how to bring fantasies alive. It’s the best kink out there.

    When it comes to kinky, clarity and communication are crucial.

    As every profession or field, BDSM also has its vocabulary.

    What is kink?

    Kink refers to any activity that diverts from the ‘norm’, and it gives sexual pleasure. It’s an intimate experience, an exchange of power between people that can be physical, erotic, sensual, spiritual experience or all above.

    -Dom / Dominatrix ( active) also called Master or Top:

    An individual who create, control and actively move forward the scene by giving orders, experiments and rewards.

    -Submissive ( passive) also called Slave or Bottom:

    An individual who surrender, follow orders and gives up control to (or “intending to”) please her/his Master.

    -Switch

    A person who can be both Dominant or Submissive depending on who she/he interacts in a scene.

    – Scene:

    The actual act and place, the scenario of the play – who will do what. It’s important that before you start playing you set the rules. All participant needs to know what they will be doing and what are the boundaries.

    BDSM sex should always be:

    Safe

    Sane

    Consensual sex. 

    Safe: You don’t injure anyone. You discuss with your BDSM partner before starting a scene what is a “YES-NO-MAYBE” while playing. Partners need to communicate and agree on boundaries. What they want to experience, willing to try, outcome and what they do not want to experience at all.  Always set a safe word before starting a scene.

    Safe word can be used when things get heated.

    It could be something that stops the act entirely or just reduce the intensity. Again it all depends on the previous agreement between the parties. If you have absolute trust, you can say: no safe word, however, for this, you need to know your partner well.  When no safe word applied, there is no place to complain! Anything goes!

    Know yourself, especially if you playing with a more experienced partner. No safewords translate no taboos; anything can happen.

    Is that what you want?

    Example: You like to try sensation play on your nipples.

    The Dom starts to press, pull, twist the nipple with the tip of their fingers slowly then adding more and more pressure into the movement. Keeping eye-contact with Sub. If you are more adventurous or your level of pain tolerance is high, you can always add nipple clamps into this play. (If you haven’t got nipple clamps you can use DIY clamps, cloths-pegs!) Cloth-pegs could be applied to all areas of the body to intensify sensations.

    Sane: Keep in respect the other person’s boundaries. Don’t go overboard giving pain and don’t cause harm. Before practising any form of BDSM start from the basics. Read articles, books and try to learn so you know what are you doing. Begin exercising and evolve your technique as you developed trust. Don’t forget the more you learn, the better you get. Technicality and becoming a Master of BDSM, it does take time.

    Consensual sex:

    Both parties need to be on the same page. Need to agree and communicate prior and during the scene, express feelings and desires. BDSM sex if done right can be a unique and freeing (sexually healing) experience. When the power dynamics work well, it’s highly pleasurable for both parties. If things take off and it’s more than you expected or able to handle, it’s okay to stop. Any decision during the scene has to be respected and honoured from both sides. It’s super important to have “aftercare” after an intense session. As in regular sex, you would cuddle, in BDSM you can chat, cry or whatever feels right after. Don’t hide your feelings, express them. Remember, it’s a healing sexual experience to connect with exact sexual needs! 

    Alexandra Holovitz is a tantric sex coach & hypnotherapist. She is known for her honest, passionate and authentic coaching style. 

    She works with high achieving men in their 40′ helping them to heal, express and empower thought tantra, mindset and self-compassion. 

    She believes in holistic healing (mind-body-soul) and by awakening sexual energy to thrive in life and business with deep connection, love and sexual liberation! 

    You can learn more about her work at www.alexandra.guru and connect with her via  Instagram.

    Follow Alexandra on:

    Work with me: https://www.alexandra.guru/work-with-me/

    Instagram: www.instagram.com/alexandra_guru

    Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/sexyliberation

    Promo: https://www.alexandra.guru/sex-master-hypnosis ( this is a self-study Hypno bundle for more confidence) 

    Featured image courtesy of Shutterstock

    Like to be featured on SimplySxy? Drop us an email at editorial@SimplySxy.com!

  • How Do I Explore My Interest In Being A Sissy?

    How Do I Explore My Interest In Being A Sissy?

    I think that being a sissy is obviously a niche genre that involves many degrees of androgyny and mix bag of sexual orientation which are not mutually exclusive. Being a ‘sissy’ to me is cross-dressing to the fullest potential I’m able to practice and achieve. It is a pseudo-effeminate approach for those who long to feel sexy in countless outfits, shoes and accessories without actually being transgender.

    How My Interest In Being A Sissy Started

    The interest sparked for me in my early teens. I imagine it began the same way it did for many, with a pair of panties. In this case, I actually worked up the nerve to purchase a pair of my own out of curiosity and it was all downhill from there.

    Challenges I Faced Initially

    The shame and guilt early on took a long time to overcome. I spent a small fortune on clothing and would purge the wardrobe on many occasions in a failed attempt to eradicate the urge; need to dress and doll up.

    Eventually, I came to terms with my “affliction” and allowed my collection to flourish over the years. Life is far too short to have to let myself only maintain a secret interest without ever indulging and truly knowing yourself.

    Common Misconceptions About Sissies

    In my opinion, some of the sub-genres of being a sissy involve those who never “graduated” from the panty-boy stage. The many who are too lazy to put in the effort beyond a sexual interest tend to give it worse a reputation than it already has.

    I can’t say we clearly aren’t all confused as to the why or the how the attraction began but we’re all inherently flawed somehow.  So, forget the haters, if anything is worth doing, it’s worth doing right.

    Important Aspects When Learning To Be A Sissy

    I think that whatever your ‘thing’ is, that you should try and grow in that direction within reason of course. The milestones involved are different for everyone I’m sure but the most notably difficult part is makeup which the internet can be a wealth of information when learning how to do the most important step.

    It’s the difference between not being taken seriously as an unshaven man or looking presentable as a woman. I’ve found that how well you’re perceived or accepted is directly relative to your sincerity and efforts.

    Sissy Shawna – I am a submissive pansexual sissy crossdresser who enjoys being humiliated and degraded by Dominant women and will suck a golf ball through a garden hose for Alpha men.

    Follow Sissy Shawna on

    Twitter: @sissyfag1984

    KiK: ShawnaSissy

    Email: Sissy.shawna@yahoo.com

    Images courtesy of Jonalyn

    Like to be featured on SimplySxy? Drop us an email at editorial@SimplySxy.com!

  • Erotic Hypnosis: Guide to Mind-Blowing Orgasm Without Touch? (Part 2)

    Erotic Hypnosis: Guide to Mind-Blowing Orgasm Without Touch? (Part 2)

    Many times, it is not what you say, but how you say it that matters. Mastering your voice will give you great success with women. Hypnotic language can help you make a connection with the ladies instantly. Pick and persuade them almost anything you like, communicate to them and make them feel you speak their language. Last, but not least, using hypnotic words can make you a better lover in bed. Saying a few sexy words during sex can help to reach the best orgasms for women (men too!).

    What’s your ideal man in bed? – asked my friend the other day.

    “I want someone who can “mindfuck me” while we are having sex. – she stated her desire. 

    What’s the “mindfuck” of the 21st century?

    It’s an erotic hypnosis. During “hypo-sex” you can get completely relaxed, comfortable, open about your sexual desires, fantasies and communicate openly with your partner during sex – that’s why they often incorporate this into BDSM role-plays.

    You can call upon a sex scene when you both are very aroused and have a memorable sexual experience. Remember: The brain can’t make a difference between reality or vivid memory pictures, especially when in an aroused state. Why not use this to your advantage?

    Have you noticed within your relationship that saying certain things during sex can sexually trigger your partner’s mental and physical state? Maybe even get him/her to reach hypnosis orgasm instantly?

    If you master erotic education and guidance before getting down to ‘business’, your partner can experience a hands-free orgasm (aka HFO) without you doing anything to them physically.

    Example: You are having dinner at a fancy restaurant.

    You can’t reach one another physically. You can start using seductive language in your conversations and watch what happens to her/him.

    Example: Women in the bar, with two guys trying to chat her up. One has a great look, but unable to say much and there is another man who is not particularly her type, but somehow he always says the right things in the right time.

    I’m sure you all think of a situation when you did not particularly fancy a guy, but something he was saying just magnified your brain and set on fire your mind and pussy. That’s what hands-free hypnosis does to you. Giving you a chance to open your thoughts for possibilities and experience a hand’s free orgasm without being touched. I know it sounds crazy, but once you experience it, you understand what I’m talking about.

    You might not believe any of what you just read until (it’s okay, probably you have more left-brain thinking, more realistic) or might hear some negative rep when it comes to hypnosis.

    We all use hypnosis on a daily basis for some extent.

    You hypnotise yourself while reading a book, or watching a movie.

    Best example: We regularly have been hypnotised by television commercials. It’s not by accident how all the ads follow each other in every single movie breaks. There are also suggestions which depend on how much your brain accepts them and you can take them on board.

    Why not hands-free hypnotise yourself towards becoming a Sex Goddess/God in bed instead?

    I would rather reach multiple hands-free orgasms than having another commercial suggesting to have a pill against a headache. By the way, hypnosis works well for pain-relieving (headaches) as well. Give it a try before claiming another “I have a headache” which can lead sexless nights and more ‘a headache’ for your man. Headaches caused by a long night out can be cured quickly by having morning sex. Hypnosis or regular orgasm helps to boost your blood flow and cleans your head for sure. Pandora tested 🙂

    15 Easy Steps to Start Hands-Free Self-Hypnosis:

    1: Find a comfortable space, where you won’t be disturb

    2: Sit down and start focusing on your breath

    3: Breathe in and out with same slow pacing

    4: Start visualising a white light

    5: Meditate on the light

    6: Imagine the light running through your body, clearing space, healing your blockages

    7: Make first positive suggestion (make it related on what you hypnotise yourself)

    8: Start counting back 1,2,3

    9: Tell yourself to breathe deeper and go deeper

    10: Make a 2nd positive suggestion

    11: Start counting 4,5,6

    12: Suggest you go deeper and more relaxed

    13: Make the 3rd positive suggestion

    14: Count down 7,8,9

    15: By the time I reach 10, I will open my eyes and feel XYZ ( put what you like to experience)

    You can guide yourself or your partner through erotic hypnosis as foreplay.

    Create a “magic word” that you will use during the count downs.

    A magic word can be “sexy”, “pleasure” “surrender” whatever you want to experience and whatever words you can relate to.

    This magic word will be the power switch during the hypnosis suggestions to help you get into a trance state where suggestion can work best.

    Example:

    I’m walking across the bedroom. Look at him while he lays on the bed and “I feel sexy and surrender to pleasure” – Repeat this statement three times during your self-hypnosis and next time, watch what happens when you are activating the state. You can easily slip in and out of hypnotic states – all you need to do is just tap it into your fingertips. While you make suggestions to anchor, it snaps your fingers. Next time, when you snap your fingers, you can instantly feel that state of sexy, powerful women. If you are planning to do hypnosis on yourself for multiple things, just tap states in various places on the body, so your brain doesn’t get confused.

    A client of mine wanted to reach an orgasm whenever she would touch or rub her left elbow.

    As her hypnotist, I guided her through the relaxation process. Helped her visualise a sexual play earlier when she reached the best orgasm by rubbing her clitoris.

    Once we had the memory, I supported her to get into a profound and relaxed state through breathing and connecting with the sensation of orgasm. Giving her positive suggestions about how sensitive her left elbow was. Encouraged her to feel again the orgasmic state. Redirect her focus on how she would feel when next, she would touch her elbows with the same circular motions as she touched her clit. Hypnotiser asked her to touch her left elbow as she would touch her clit then guided her into a deeper trance. When I snap my fingers and give permission to have the clitoris orgasm, it has been tapped into her elbow now. Ever since, when she is nervous or wanting to have a quicky with herself, she told me, she just touches her left elbow and feels the similar excitement as she would play with her clitoris.

    I find it fascinating of the power of the brain and what can be achieved if we set our intention on it.

    Rubbing your elbow and having an orgasm?

    Incredible. Hypnosis orgasm are limitless! (be bold and let your fantasies come true!)

    Most people only use three per cent of their brain. Imagine the possibilities once you master your mind and are able to give some positive suggestion to it, what can happen? Maybe you will be just like my friend who now can reach her best orgasm type pretty much anytime anywhere. A huge mood booster in a dragging office day!

    A male client reported reaching multiple orgasms just by listening to a prerecorded Hypno-audio

    “As I closed my eyes and listen to your sexy voice, I felt my entire body sink deeper into the mattress as I let go of control. A similar feeling when I practice meditation, but much deeper. I felt quickly relaxed and in total ease. Felt: reassuring, calm, peaceful to be there. Somehow a familiar feeling, similar when your lover holds you, yeah I felt safe. Went dropped deeper into a trance, I stopped thinking and just felt tingling in my body as your voice seduced me deeper and deeper. Then felt pulsating in my cock. My mind was alert for a moment: Omg, what is happening? Then I let go and felt deep craving wanting to touch myself…. but keep my hands away, grabbing the sheets, trying just to let go whatever my brain can process at this stage and let her voice guide me through this beautiful almost out of body experience. My entire body is shaking, jumping up and down on the bed, felt warm and sweat run down on my cheek through my breast. My soul felt free, my heart opened it was a sensation like I can fly. Floating. I feel joyous; a feeling came to me that I made a connection with the divine around and within me.  Almost like being in love.

    When you suggested: “Ride that pleasure wave”.

    I breakthrough and BANG, my whole body started climaxing and holly f*** I reached orgasm, multiple ones. It wasn’t just an orgasm. It was some earth-shattering magical hands-free orgasm; all sprang from my brain. Crazy, but it did work 🙂 Thank you, thank you, Alexandra, for this remarkable recording and healing pleasure.

    I’m sure we will be back for some more.

    Are you interested in try hypnosis or Hypno-sex?

    You can listen to this ORGASMIC body scan recording to get a teaser of what it’s like to surrender to pleasure by my voice.

    I hope you found this article interesting enough to give it a try and embark erotic hypnosis, Hypno-sex journey.

    You can try self-hypnosis or reach out to me to get hypnotized.

    Feel free to share your HFO journey.

    Choose a “magic word” that can trigger your sexuality instantly for an ecstatic state and multiple orgasms.

    Ps: Don’t get disappointed, if you don’t succeed for the first time.

    I practice guided meditations daily; it does take some time to be able to get into and out of trance easily.

    Just be willing, open and curious to explore!

    Have an orgasmic day!

    Hypnotic Hello my loves,

    Alexandra

    Alexandra Holovitz is a tantric sex coach & hypnotherapist. She is known for her honest, passionate and authentic coaching style. 

    She works with high achieving men in their 40′ helping them to heal, express and empower thought tantra, mindset and self-compassion. 

    She believes in holistic healing (mind-body-soul) and by awakening sexual energy to thrive in life and business with deep connection, love and sexual liberation! 

    You can learn more about her work at www.alexandra.guru and connect with her via  Instagram.

    Follow Alexandra on:

    Work with me: https://www.alexandra.guru/work-with-me/

    Instagram: www.instagram.com/alexandra_guru

    Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/sexyliberation

    Promo: https://www.alexandra.guru/sex-master-hypnosis ( this is a self-study Hypno bundle for more confidence) 

    Featured image courtesy of Shutterstock

    Like to be featured on SimplySxy? Drop us an email at editorial@SimplySxy.com!

  • Erotic Hypnosis: Guide to Mind-Blowing Orgasm Without Touch? (Part 1)

    Erotic Hypnosis: Guide to Mind-Blowing Orgasm Without Touch? (Part 1)

    What is hypnosis?

    Hypnosis is a deeply relaxing state where the subconscious mind opens up to receive the suggestion. Many people think that during hypnosis you fall asleep, however, this is far from the truth. Hypnosis actually awakens you. It awakens your mind, body and senses for more and deeper pleasure.

    During hypnosis, the conscious (thinking) brain switches off, so we can reach the subconscious. It’s a safe, relaxed but alert state where focus increases, so you become more open to transformation. Sex happens in the gamma stage of the human brain. When in a trance, your brain is able to activate ecstatic experiences such as a hand’s free orgasm. So it’s true, all real action happens between your ears, not between your legs.

    It’s a popular myth that during hypnosis, you can be asked to perform things that in normal life never occurs to do. However, it’s possible to make suggestions, but the participant’s brain will keep consciousness and only act on principles it agrees on. In my point of view, hypnosis can bring subconscious limiting beliefs or blocks around sexuality on the surface.

    Wherever you realise or not, you are being hypnotised on a daily basis. Hypnotic language has been used during movies, TV-programs, in magazines, etc.

    Research shows that people with higher intelligence level and creativity shows a greater response being hypnotised. There are two types of hypnosis, auto-hypnosis (self-hypnosis) or hetero-hypnosis ( hypnotizer walk you through the process), both entitled to raise your consciousness in a highly relaxing trance state.

    Erotic hypnosis can make you become a better lover, and your sex life can be made more intense, fun and a pleasurable activity. 

    The phenomenon is also called a hands-free orgasm or “Hypno sex”. Erotic hypnosis is a way to seduce someone through their mind. This type of hypnosis can enhance intimacy, love, and trust in the couple’s relationship while boosting their sexual life and gives the best orgasms.

    When applying erotic hypnosis, women can feel more sexually desired, can experience increased sexual libido and able to eliminate shame and guilt about any sexual desires. During hypnosis, we enter a deep relaxation state called a trance. In a trance, the brain becomes more alert and focuses on verbal suggestions. Suggestions are short messages; and words can trigger certain emotions within our brain. A sexy voice can guide you to places in your mind that you never knew existed.

    Our brain can’t tell the difference between reality or a vivid memory, that’s why erotic hypnosis can feel like a real ecstatic orgasm without being actually touched. Some people can easily fall into hypnosis just by listening to a pleasant voice.

    If it’s erotic hypnosis, it can easily lead to a sexually freeing experience and a hands-free-orgasm.

    (Remember ladies, everything happens up between your ears – all pleasure starts in the brain!)

    An interesting fact about female orgasm:

    Women can have at least five different types of orgasm!

    “Five”? I’m fortunate if I have one. 

    “You meant three, right?” – reaction to my statement.

    Well, it’s true that the female orgasm is more complex than men’s. However, it’s nothing to do with physical ability, more of that women need to feel completely relaxed, comfortable, safe and have some level of emotional stability and connection to herself or partner to reach an orgasm.

    What are the five most common types of female orgasm out there:

    1: Clitoris orgasm

    Clitoris orgasm is the most common type of female orgasm. Most women can reach orgasm by rubbing the clitoris and the area around by her finger or using a vibrator on the clitoris. The clitoris has millions of little nerves running through. It is the super-sensitive “magic bottom”  which by the right stimulation, can help women reach orgasms the easiest and fastest way.

    2: Vaginal orgasms

    Vaginal orgasms can be achieved by G-spot stimulation or having intercourse with your partner or using your favourite vibrator to pleasure your yoni. (yoni = vagina) Less sensitive for most women than the clitoris area. However, if you can have a vaginal orgasm, it’s a more intense orgasm. Men find this type of orgasm super sexy as they make your vaginal orgasms credited due to their “magic wand” and TLC abilities.

    3: Joint orgasms

    Joint orgasms are when more than one erogenous zone has been stimulated simultaneously for reaching orgasm. It can be the clitoris, vagina and anus area. The more stimulation it is, the better chance to have the best orgasm, and maybe even multiple orgasms.

    4: Anal orgasms

    For some women, it’s still a taboo area. No entry. No back door fun. It’s considered ‘something only bad girls do, or it’s for porn stars’. Today, there are hips of anal (starters) toy kits to start exploring. Give it a try, before quitting it. Make sure to lubricate and start with something small. Back door plays are the same as any sexual activity, the more you do it, the better you become. Practice makes perfect, be confident and with time it gets easier. However, it might not be your thing at all, so don’t force it on yourself. Anal sex has to be something both partners agree on and willing to explore (without fears)! Otherwise, you are set up for failure before you even started!

    5: Hands-free orgasm

    I am a firm believer that people’s biggest sex organ is the brain. The place where everything is related to everything. Good news guys, if you learn to communicate with the right vocal tone and use some seductive, hypnotic language, your lady will be on her knees with no time. Mastering hypnotic language will spice up your dating life.

    Part 2 to follow…

    Alexandra Holovitz is a tantric sex coach & hypnotherapist. She is known for her honest, passionate and authentic coaching style. 

    She works with high achieving men in their 40′ helping them to heal, express and empower thought tantra, mindset and self-compassion. 

    She believes in holistic healing (mind-body-soul) and by awakening sexual energy to thrive in life and business with deep connection, love and sexual liberation! 

    You can learn more about her work at www.alexandra.guru and connect with her via  Instagram.

    Follow Alexandra on:

    Work with me: https://www.alexandra.guru/work-with-me/

    Instagram: www.instagram.com/alexandra_guru

    Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/groups/sexyliberation

    Promo: https://www.alexandra.guru/sex-master-hypnosis ( this is a self-study Hypno bundle for more confidence) 

    Featured image courtesy of Shutterstock

    Like to be featured on SimplySxy? Drop us an email at editorial@SimplySxy.com!

  • How To Have Self Bondage Fun

    How To Have Self Bondage Fun

    BDSM for me is like the deepest level of sex and intimacy.  It’s about more than basic pleasure, it’s about exploring every level of physical sensation, or controlling that sensation in others depending on what side of the leash you’re on at the moment.

    What I Love About Bondage

    Oh gods, do I have to pick just one thing?  Well, if I had to settle on one main thing I love, it would be the wild variety.  There is no one way to Dom or sub and there is no one way to get tied up.

    What Is Self Bondage?

    Well, it’s exactly what it sounds like.  Usually it involves tying yourself up or handcuffing yourself and just enjoying that sensation not helplessness.  A lot of people will add in toys as well, usually vibrators, to stimulate areas while being unable to easily remove them. 

    Self Bondage Tips For Beginners

    A lot of people shit talk fuzzy handcuffs, but to be honest, this is exactly the kind of thing they were made for.  You can pick them up in just about any adult store or section, and they have these nifty little release latches in case things go wrong or it’s just not your thing.

    As for tips, the biggest one I can give is to just relax and enjoy yourself.  This is not something you should do spontaneously, this is something you should set up a scheduled time for.  And there are a ton of websites and resources online for tips and tricks depending on your exact situation. 

    Favorite Items & Props Of Mine

    I’m a huge fan of Shibari, have been for years, so rope is my usual go-to.  As for props, there are no beating the classics, and I have yet to meet something that beats the sheer versatility of my Hitachi wand.  However, my absolute fave prop is Lola, my fucking machine and reoccurring co-star.  There is no feeling quite like being tied up and having a piston ram into you at a constant rate and rep.

    Ways To Kink Up Self Bondage

    The best way to kink up self-bondage is to add more.  Get yourself a gimp hood and go full sensory-deprivation.  Freeze the key to your cuffs in a water bottle, so you can’t get out until it melts.  Get a webcam and livestream the whole thing to your partner. Take some edibles before hand, if that’s legal in your area.  The only limit to self-bondage is your own experience and imagination.

    My name’s Roxxie Rae Page, I’m just your typical pan trans goth freak who loves dabbling in the kinkier side of things.  I’m a lifelong gamer, I love just about every genre of music, and I’m a firm believer that pineapples do in fact belong on pizza. 

    Follow Roxxie Rae Page on:

    Twitter: @EWrangler

    ManyVids: roxxie-rae-page.manyvids.com

    OnlyFans: only fans.com/roxxie-rae-page

    Images courtesy of Roxxie Rage Page

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  • How To Explore & Enjoy Sissification With Mistress Lucy

    How To Explore & Enjoy Sissification With Mistress Lucy

    I’ve always been a kinkster myself. I started exploring my sexuality in my teens and spent a lot of time in kinky and queer spaces including play and sex parties. I believe that the exploration of deviant sexuality offers a huge potential for liberation and growth. Kink can be very powerful – it can allow us to enter a non-judgemental zone full of playfulness, pleasure and pain. It can be very transformative.

    What I Love About Online Domination

    What I like about online domination is that it allows for a bigger audience and the creation of a kinkster community. Especially my live chat room has become a place for my regulars to chat with me and with each other. It also allows for at home play which for many of my clients, feels safer and more accessible than going to a dungeon in a far away city.

    I started from personal experience. I’ve had many submissive dates and partners before. My decision to go pro came from a long held desire to become a full time domme.

    What Is Sissification?

    I love Sissification because I think that there is something so inherently sensual, sexy and sweet in femininity. Our society is so fixated on masculinity that it forgets about the deep power of femininity. Going down the path of Sissification offers a whole range of sensations and experiences that most men (or people raised as men) were never allowed to explore: the softness of freshly shaved legs, the feeling of a thong rubbing between the sissy’s butt cheeks, the joy of a sexy dance. As a Mistress who is in touch with her inner Goddess, my part is to enable and guide this journey with tenderness and encouragement as well as persistence.

    My Sissification training entails dress up, make up and blow job training, education in all things girly (dancing, walking, shopping, sensuality, cleaning, cooking, girly movie nights) and possibly also chastity and/or anal stimulation, depending on the wishes of the sissy that I’m working with. In some cases, I will pimp out the sissy and make her earn cash for me either online or in real life.

    Misconceptions Of Sissification

    Unfortunately, there is quite a lot of misconception in the mainstream about Sissification. Sissies are often belittled and laughed at which comes from a sexist idea that anything feminine is less worthy than masculinity. I often observe a lot of shame in my sissies and my aim is to work towards a shame free expression of their fetish (unless they get off on humiliation).

    What Makes Me An Ideal Domme

    My domme style comes from a space of natural power. I’m in touch with my inner Goddess who is both nurturing and punishing. I dominate on a fluid spectrum reaching from sweet Mommy to devious Sadist. With sissies, I can explore my sweeter and more nurturing side, the Mommy in me. Which of course doesn’t mean that I can’t also be nasty and humiliating at the same time – Mommy is mean sometimes!

    Favorite Sissification Scenarios

    One of my favorite scenarios is being served as the Queen by my sissy servants. I love good servitude and think that sissies can make great maids, assistants and whores whose main purpose is to make my life as pleasurable and easy as possible. In return they get to wear gorgeous slutty outfits and suck my pink blue glittery strap-on.

    Advice For Beginners

    Don’t be afraid of judgement! Sissification is such a fun and sexy fetish and there is absolutely nothing to be ashamed of.

    I am Mistress Lucy Lash – your smart and sensual Mistress from Germany. Let yourself fall into my guiding hands and experience the sweetness of complete surrender. I will make you submit, suffer and squirm in pain and pleasure.

    Follow Mistress Lucy Lash on

    Website: mistresslucylash.com

    Chaturbate: chaturbate.com/lucylash

    Skyprivate: https://profiles.skyprivate.com/models/ao9d-mistress-lucy-lash.html

    ManyVids: https://www.manyvids.com/Profile/1002107726/Mistress-Lucy-Lash/Store/Videos/

    Twitter: https://twitter.com/MistresLucyLash

    Images courtesy of Mistress Lucy Lash

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  • 8 Ways To Be More Adventurous In Bed

    8 Ways To Be More Adventurous In Bed

    Everyone has sexual fantasies. Perhaps some may dream about re-creating the red room of pain from a popular movie or maybe you just like to try new positions with your partner to level up your sex life. Either way, talking about any sexual desire can be a vulnerable and awkward experience. So, how can you be more adventurous in bed?

    Other than searching for the best sex tips and advice, there are various ways to be more adventurous, and these may include the following:

    1. Communicate Honestly And Openly With Your Partner

    Asking your partner to try something new in bed may frequently make the other person feel a little insecure. If your partner says no to your request, it’ll typically leave you feeling prudish, unadventurous, and unsexy. To avoid this, be open with your partner about why certain fantasies appeal to you while reassuring them that you find them sexy.

    Also, sharing sexual fantasies must be taken as a compliment. They’re showing commitment and trust by asking you, instead of seeking it elsewhere and taking the coward’s way out

    2. Start With A Massage Or A Bath

    Rather than jumping into lovemaking, why not try something that’ll relax both of you and will help you feel intimate? Doing something that’ll connect you intimately with your partner shows that you care about your relationship, and you’re not just after sex. So, take a shower and cuddle in a warm bath. Let your partner massage you, and relax before you have amazing sex.

    3. Create Rules

    One of the ways to be more adventurous in bed is by prohibiting standby activities for a certain period. Have a rule that you can’t go down for a certain position for several weeks, or you can tweak the position to something like you’re both not allowed to do anything except kissing one another for the whole week. It could be an arbitrary rule, but it’ll feel a bit sexy that particular things aren’t allowed.

    4. Use Sexual Vocabulary

    While learning some new sex positions is essential, there are ways to be more adventurous in bed, and one of them is by talking dirty. It can be used in bed and out of it to keep some things spicy. For instance, you can send dirty text messages or watch instructional videos where you can use dirty talk to keep your partner attracted to you and to build sexual tension.

    5. Learn New Positions

    Learning new positions is another thing you should take into consideration, especially if you’re serious about being more adventurous in bed.

    At present, there are countless sex positions you can try that you’ll never get bored in bed. Depending on your preferences, talk with your partner about the positions you can try so that you both can agree on which to consider.

    6. Play Games

    Another way to be more adventurous in bed is to be playful and creative. There are many fun ways to turn lovemaking into a game. Make some bets on trivia questions and let the prize be a massage. Wrestle with one another naked and tease each other. With such ideas, you can make your bedroom the liveliest place ever, which can be of great help to awaken your sex life.

    7. Experiment With Your Fantasies

    Many people think that they must only suggest to their partner the activities they know she or he would want to accept. This is because others are scared of being vulnerable and how their partner will perceive them if they suggest a certain activity. For this reason, some tend to depend on standbys, and play it safe. The only problem is that it’s hard to know if you’ll like something if you haven’t tried it yet. Just explore such things that sound interesting to you. For instance, the idea of being dominated might bring curiosity, but you’re afraid to suggest it. The best thing that you should do is to give it a shot. Even if it doesn’t end up being your favorite activity, you’ll have a new experience with your lover.

    8. Set Boundaries And Be Clear On What You Want

    Many people can cope with doing some unusual sexual things consistently. However, some people want it simple. This is the reason setting boundaries and being clear on what you want can make everything more comfortable, build trust, and create a positive experience.

    Final Thoughts

    While you don’t always have to try something new in bed, the willingness to be adventurous can help you achieve a more satisfying sex life and happy relationship. Trying some new things can also keep you and your partner closer together and will teach you more about yourself in the process. So, keep the above tips in mind and get ready to spice up your relationship.

    Featured image courtesy of Adobe Stock

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  • How To Explore My Fetishes With A Companion

    How To Explore My Fetishes With A Companion

    I love companionship. For me, it’s one of the most self-indulgent things you can treat yourself to. It’s always a thrill to look forward to a new meet, as there are so many possibilities. When I’m with a client, I truly feel as if they’re treating themselves – between the whisky, cheeseboards, and hum of excitement in the air, it feels like we’re both getting the worlds best present. I love being able to share myself and my passions with another, and feel them reciprocated with the same fervor. I’ve always lived in the moment, and there’s a certain kind of exhilaration in giving yourself entirely to a stranger.

    Similarly, I feel my clients shrug off the stresses of the world with me while they step into a fantasy where nothing matters except the next moment together. It really does feel like we’re outside of time, often in a world all of our own – it’s hypnotic, in a way. I’m grateful every day to be able to explore this side of myself with those who place their trust so deeply in me.

    How I Got Interested In Fetishes

    My interests in fetishes actually started with fandom and fan fiction! I remember huddling under my blankets at night, reading novels about my favourite characters – except all of a sudden, they would be tying each other up, and I was reacting in ways I never thought possible.

    I only started exploring the BDSM community when I was 20 when one of my work friends invited me to a night out, and my interest spiralled from there. My first encounter felt like I had stepped into the fantasy world of my dreams! I’m actually still in contact with the first man who ever spanked me, and to this day, he’s constantly teaching me new things.

    I ended up offering pro submission work, given that I enjoyed it so much, and as I attended skillshares, my hard skills increased to the level that I began offering pro domme work alongside it. These days, I tend to switch (someone who both submits and dominates people) fairly evenly, with a particular love of spanking, Shibari, needle play, wax play, and fisting. I’ve previously co-presented educational workshops about Shibari at Sexpo in 2019, and was lucky enough to tutor under one of Australia’s best needle play mentors a few years ago.

    What Makes Me An Ideal Companion To Explore Your Fetishes With

    I think the most important thing for any companion, kink or vanilla, is to keep an open mind about everything! I’ve always approached life with a “try everything once” philosophy, and I carry over that same line of thinking to my kink exploration. There have been plenty of times clients have approached me with fetishes I know nothing about, and I’ve had a ball exploring it with them!

    It’s important to have open and honest communication between you both, including disclosing any triggers, past injuries, and level of experience, as well as what you’re hoping to get out of the play; there’s a huge difference between a rhythmic meditative flogging, and a flogging that’s designed to break skin and bruise!

    I would also consider myself a very curious person, so when I am approached with a new fetish request, I happily spend hours researching it – including any safety aspects I might need to consider.

    Ideal Duration To Explore Fetishes Together

    This is so highly dependent on the fetish, and what you’re hoping to achieve during the session. For newbies, I tend to recommend around three hours, to cover important negotiation time, slow introduction, allow plenty of time for feedback and questioning, and plenty of aftercare at the end! I’ve given light spankings in 30 minutes, and I’ve done a needle session for four hours.

    I find multi day sessions to be too strenuous when it comes to intense kink, although I know some providers who excel at them, but I simply find staying in the headspace for that long far too taxing on both of us! As a general rule, I suggest between 2-4 hours to explore fetish and kink with me. When we play, we release some really powerful chemicals – adrenaline and endorphins flood our body, so it’s important to factor in time at the end to come back to earth, reassure each other that everything was okay, and reflect on the session at the end.

    Some sessions also involve a lot of cleanup too – rope takes time to untie, sploshing means the floors need to be mopped, and needle play means that wounds need to be tended to. It’s certainly not something I would do in a 15 minute lunchtime quickie.

    How Do You Calm Someone Who Is Nervous?

    I’ve actually never had this problem! Is that bad of me? I think booking any session, there’s always going to be some nerves, but I’ve never found anyone to be overly shy upon meeting me. Usually, they’re full of enthusiasm to finally live out their fantasy!

    I tend to write a lot about BDSM on my blog, which probably helps – explaining the fetish beforehand through the lens of personal experience tends to quell any nervous butterflies. I’ve always had quite a big personality, and my genuine excitement to meet new people spills over into any meeting, so I think it’s quite hard for anyone not to be swept up in that and be equally as excited. Enthusiasm is infectious, after all.

    Follow These Rules During Our Time Together

    There would be no consent without boundaries – your power to say yes only lies in your ability to say no. I pre negotiate each individual session over text, and again at the start of the session, but I have a few ground rules: no hardsports, nothing that impacts on my safety, and nothing illegal.

    Additionally, if you don’t have any boundaries of your own, I’ll feel uneasy playing with you and will likely cancel. My favourite clients are those who listen to my boundaries, honor my space, and openly communicate their own. Nothing is worse than calling a client a name mid session, only to have them burst into tears and end the session.

    Kristen Jade – An Australian escort, pro kinkster, and content creator. She has been described as an “unrepentant brat” and refuses to take life too seriously. On her off days, you’ll find her cuddling up with her two cats and getting her ass kicked in video games. She has been a sex worker for six years and a BDSM educator for three, as well as touring the Shibari performance circuit across Australia and being invited to sexuality retreats. You’ll often find her travelling interstate, fuelled by passion and desire to explore the unknown.

    Follow Kristen Jade on

    Website: www.kristenjadeaus.com

    Twitter: @kristenjadeaus

    Instagram: @kristenjadeaus

    ManyVids: kristenjadeaus.manyvids.com

    Kristen resides in Sydney, but will be in Melbourne 4-8 May, Canberra 22-27 May, and Hobart 8-12 of June. She has plans to visit Brisbane, Darwin, and Perth later in the year. In the meantime, she regularly releases porn on her ManyVids, as well as writing on her blog at www.kristenjadeaus.com/blog

    Article images courtesy of Kristen Jade

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  • How Does Open Communication Lead To Better Sex?

    How Does Open Communication Lead To Better Sex?

    Well apart from loving it, I think sex is a really powerful way to explore different aspects of our identity. I think sex is as varied as music is and it can mean something different every time we choose to participate. Sometimes it is fun and silly, sometimes it is intense and passionate, sometimes it is hot, dark, pounding and sweaty and sometimes, it’s deeply intimate or romantic.

    I wish that sex and sexuality wasn’t as stigmatized and that more people felt comfortable to express and explore their sexuality, fantasies and desires without being burdened by feelings of shame.

    The Importance Of Communication

    Communication is soooo important and hugely underrated! Working towards feeling comfortable enough to express what you want in the bedroom is a huge step to opening up your sexual encounters and experiences. The most important part of communication is learning how to listen and respond! After all is there anything hotter than when you really start listening to the breathing and moans of someone else in bed and responding accordingly?

    As someone who has lots of sex with different people, it has taught me how different everyone’s bodies are! Without open communication, how can we expect our bedfellows to know exactly what feels good! So, create a space where honest dialogue is encouraged but also listen out for those non-verbal cues that come with slowing things down, speeding them up to try to lock into you playmates reactions. I think we can all learn more from the BDSM community and the conversations they engage in before any type of play. To see where each other’s head is at that day and what sorts of things they would like to explore!

    If you are wanting things to get a little bit kinky in your sex life, there are a few things you can do to help move things along. 1) Be brave – If you are brave enough to share your desires with a lover/play pal, it will give them permission to do the same. 2) Timing – Bring things up at a time which is relaxed and intimate but not sexual – this will give them time to think about things and not feel pressured or tricked into something. 3) Be ready to take no for an answer. Sex is only fun when both parties are actively enthusiastically consenting. It is also ok to try things and decide they are not for us! That doesn’t mean we are boring or vanilla.

    Why I’m An Ideal Companion To Be With

    I think it is my natural curiosity about people and my love for learning from varied perspectives of the world. I am a really empathetic and optimistic person so it is really easy for me to find qualities I find attractive in people and am able to form connections quickly.  There is something I can find to admire in almost anyone so my warmth and interest is always genuine. I think *hope* my dates can sense that.

    I am also intelligent and articulate and can seamlessly fit into most environments. Intimacy, friendship, desire and human touch are a hugely important part of the human experience and I feel really thankful that I get to engage in such an important and intimate time with so many people. I spend a lot of time listening and learning about people’s lives.  I also think I know how to keep things light hearted and fun.

    Reasons For Seeking Companionship

    Firstly, I want to clarify that it is not JUST men who seek companionship. But it does form a large majority. As humans, I think at our core we all really just want connection both emotionally and physically. Physical touch can make us feel so alive and cared for. There are so many different reasons someone would seek a companion to spend time with.

    Lot’s of people are too busy to maintain a relationship, are working through different elements of their sexuality, want to lose their virginity in a safe space or haven’t had the opportunity to engage with someone physically in a while.  Also, I think there is something really great about how defined the time spent with a companion is.

    There are clear boundaries I expect to be respected from my dates around emotions, time and physical elements. This brings a real sense of clarity to the time we spend together and creates an environment which I think tends to bring out the best version of most people. They also know that I am not going to judge them for their bodies or desires so it can be a space that is free of any insecurities around their bodies or sexuality that they may be holding.

    Ways To Engage Someone Who Is Shy

    Finding joy in all aspects of my life is something I really strive for. I try to make my interactions playful and no pressure. Although I am long-legged with a cute butt, I am also really clumsy and an enormous dork. I honestly really just believe that bodies are bodies. Sometimes in sex, things make funny noises, or I fall over when I take off my underwear, or one of us burps. I like to meet my dates as a human first and a fantasy second.

    Which is a relief because it takes the pressure off both of us that we have to “perform” and we can just enjoy each others’ company. Although having said, that I think I give a pretty mean blowjob as well which can’t hurt someone’s nerves.

     I also really try to gauge both in the lead up to meeting and the first part of our date what sort of experience they are after and then focus on that.

    My Ideal Date & Expectations

    My ideal dates are always longer bookings so we really have time to get to know each other. I would love to meet first over a bottle of wine and some delicious food. Somewhere cosy and atmospheric. Increasingly stealing excuses to brush each other’s bodies throughout the meal in a slow lead up to spending some alone time together. I have never been on a holiday for a booking and I hope that someone decides to whisk me away to a tropical island or cosy cabin at some point!

    I would expect my dates to be polite and respectful from the very first message or email interaction until the end of our time together. Because I have a full time civilian job, I only see a handful of people and am very selective about who I will meet. I don’t think people realise how many messages companions can receive and how quickly we will make our judgements around if we want to spend time with someone.

    Also, hygiene. We make the effort to look our best for you and it is always appreciated when people do the same. Also, again, for the people up the back. Hygiene.

    Charlie Grace – My name is Charlie Grace and I am an Australian touring companion. I offer an amazing Girl Friend Experience and pride myself on always being articulate, intelligent with a down-to-earth warmth during my encounters. I’m always excited to hear from prospective dates around Australia and only engage with people who are polite, respectful and treat me like a human from the first time they message me. When I’m not working my civilian job or having exciting encounters I’m either out in nature or at an art gallery. 

    Follow Charlie Grace on

    Twitter: @CharlieGraceXOX

    Scarlet Blue: https://scarletblue.com.au/escort/charlie-grace/charlie-grace-touring?city=Sydney

    Dakota Dice: https://dakotadice.com.au/escort/charlie-grace

    Article images courtesy of Charlie Grace

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