I think two important elements to the date itself are an activity, and some kind of food. Interacting with someone in those two scenarios already tell you a lot about a person. Outside of that, if I’ve laughed, I’ve found common ground, and been able to have a small debate without anyone being put out, I consider a date a success.
Assuming there’s nothing life path-wise that’s getting in the way of continuing a relationship, and our bedroom interests line up at least a little, those are the next most important criteria to meet for me!
How Important Are First Impressions?
First impressions are important, but not unrecoverable! A good rule of thumb is that for every negative ‘point’ you acquire in your initial impression, expect it to take about twice the work to undo. As well, it’s important to remember that small awkward slips are often easily laughed off and bonded over!
There is a big difference between leaving being a genuinely negative impression and the silly awkward stuff that happens a lot on first dates!
Expectations I Have For My Date
On a personal level, I like to lay it all out on the table to any relationship that I am considering for serious, long term purposes. I want to know if our life paths are compatible! Kids, marriage, relationship responsibilities and boundaries, and so on.
I also need a partner that is able to stimulate my mind, someone who cares about things, and is knowledgeable about them. This goes just as much for girls as guys!
Common Mistakes Men Make On Dates
Most common mistakes I think relate back to being too tense or formal. If you treat a date like you’re just hanging out with a friend, I find it typically goes better. Especially early on, there’s little point in putting so much pressure on yourself for it to work out, it’s best to just relax and enjoy whatever you’ve decided on doing together!
Can There Be Too Much Flirting On Dates?
On a good date, I don’t think so! Everybody’s going to have different boundaries though. It’s important to communicate if you’re feeling uncomfortable, and listen for when the other party is trying to communicate that too.
Awkward Dating Experiences I’ve Had
Most of the awkward situations with dates I’ve been on have broken down to a lack of clear communication. Usually due to me not being aware the guy was aiming for a date!
One of the best pieces of advice I have to give is to make sure everyone is on the same page. It’s better to clarify now and perhaps cause a bit of awkwardness than it is to find out a boundary was breached or there was a big misunderstanding about something later on.
Vylentine is an online sex worker, gamer, and streamer. They have spent over 3 years in the online space building up a reputation for being witty, sexy, and very opinionated. Vy is always happy to talk vampires, politics, sex work, or games of any kind and often bounces between such topics on their stream! Most of their video catalogue is kink focused, and they are able to accommodate almost any desire you can think of.
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