Category: Sex Ed

How I Went From Camming To Being A Dominatrix

I’ve always been a free-spirit and non-judgmental person when it came to personal preferences and sexual fluidity. I do NOT kink shame, I like to call myself a kink caterer, ha! But truly? I think that the spectrum that is; sexuality, kinks, fetish, exploration of our bodies…its grown exponentially! And me? I just wanna stay right in the middle 😉

My Experience As A Camgirl

I spent my first three years in sex work; camming. Now… Don’t get me wrong; the money was amazing…but it’s a lot of hard work and disrespect. It eventually started to affect me mentally, acting as a ‘sex-kitten’ for these cheap men everyday and It wasn’t ’till I was two years in that I mastered fetish camming and we all know where that took me…paradise 🙂

What Inspired Me To Be A Dominatrix

After two years, I mastered fetish camming and realized I was only happy when I was dominating a viewer or doing something kink-related. All my slaves from my sites followed me to Twitter and the rest is history LOL.

How I Learnt To Be A Dominatrix

I had a few mentors over the years. But I am self-taught. I worked my perfect ass off reading, researching, observing, studying and then finally practicing. Young girls don’t understand how dangerous this lifestyle can be if your Domme is un-educated.

Characteristics Of A Good Dominatrix

I think she is confident, stern, intelligent, mysterious. She knows how to make you fatally attracted but also keep you at arms length by staying un-attainable…but has empathy for her slaves too, I could go on LOL. But honestly If I may say so…I just described my Domme-self.

Building My Own Home BDSM Dungeon

It’s been hell! LOL I bought a mini studio and did all the electric and drywall. Now I’m finally close to being done.

My subs can expect any and everything! It will be fully equipped with ALL fetish equipment, and your fantasies will come to life there. It’s a free and safe space. Plus, there’s also a bar and it’s very intimately located. but I don’t wanna give too much away on the Dungeon, cause there a lot upcoming on that.

Goddess Ana – I most enjoy the psychological aspects of BDSM & Femdom, The mind-fuck, if you will… I enjoy the anticipation on a mans face during one of my delicious teases. I will make The build-up as you wait and wonder what may happen; excruciating . The goosebumps,…the desire that starts as a slow burn, but with me kindling it, it builds in intensity until it consumes my men; whole. I love the Cat and mouse type-play. But; make no mistake, when you are with Me,….you will be both My property to play with …and My prey.

Not a thing pleases Me more, than once Ive penetrated My way inside Your psyche, learned what kinky things makes you tick,…and then I use your mind and body as My personal playground .

I love sadistic and Sensual Domination. I naturally lean toward bratty seductive aspects of play, and twisted aspects of punishment.

I can be a real brat at times,…but My greatest pleasure is making you squirm and whimper under My hand, while you also throw your lifes saving at my feet.

I enjoy getting to know My submissives …..and using what I learn “against” them,…for my pleasure. My pro-Domme journey began over 6yrs ago, and my experience shows in My interactions with the submissives lucky enough to be chosen to spend time with Me. Come, indulge yourself to all My wicked whims…

In person; in my fully equipped Fetish Dungeon Studio Or Online.. I can make all of your fantasies come true..

Contact me via my two Twitters (https://twitter.com/brattyMistressA)

Also, have 2 clips stores on C4S & IWC. I livestream 3xs a week on cam on chaturbate and streamate; as well as my Onlyfans – Onlyfans.com/mistress_anam and My email (paygoddessana@gmail.com) for bookings

Article images from Goddess Ana, featured image from Shutterstock

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March 11, 2021
What I Love About Being A Cam Model

Hello, I go by Koco, or WetChocolateBar. I have been a cam model since July of 2018. I was newly separated and my partner at the time was the sole financial provider, so when I became single and was introduced to camming, it changed my life. Camming is literally what you make it. If you want to have fun on cam, you’re going to do it whether the night is poppin’ or not. If you love being in front of a camera, have a friendly and social personality, don’t mind getting nude or using toys, then camming might be for you.

In my opinion, camming is NOT for everyone, like camera shy people. And just like most other self employed means of work, some days are good in terms of earning money, others, not so much. Overall, my experience as a cam model has been wonderful.

How The Idea Of Camming Came To Me

An ex-friend, by the Chaturbate username WetNTight69__, helped me take the necessary steps to actually becoming a cam mode in July 2018. If it wasn’t for her, I’m not sure if I would have actually clicked on the “model sign-up” button.

I definitely was aware of online sex work, including camming, before being directly introduced to it by that model. I had created an OnlyFans account months before I started camming, but never utilized it.

What I Love About Camming

The flexibility that comes with being a cam model is truly beneficial. I can get online whenever I want, no matter the time or date. If I traveled back to my home state, Texas, right now, and was in my hotel room with Wi-Fi, my gaming laptop, my Logitech cam, and some sexy accessories to accompany me during my live show, I could get online and make the most of my solitude.

I have also met some very interesting fans and friends. Especially my room moderators. When I have a person in my room with very vulgar vibes, my moderators always come silence ‘em so I can ban them post show.

The gifts from regulars and fans are always a very special eye widening surprise waiting on my porch when I return home, so thank you to all of my fans and friends who have surprised me!

Being able to cum while earning money is probably the best benefit that can come with camming. It’s such a turn on knowing people are getting off watching me!

My Camming Personality

Another great thing about camming is how I can truly be myself. I consider my personality to be goofy, lit, and energetic. So, for my fans, that happy, warm, inviting and “ready when you are” attitude is what attracts them. I feel like people can feel my energy through the camera, so if my energy is even slightly off, I believe it throws off the whole show.

Deciding & Preparing Content For Each Show

I usually decide how I want to reward my fans when they have tipped enough tokens, by picking and doing either a cum show, squirt show, blowjob show, or even more entertaining types of shows. I have been a solo cam model so my shows consist of using all sorts of gadgets like vibrators, such as the Lovense brand, the Hismith fuck machine, BDSM accessories like paddles/whips, clamps, ball gags, ropes, cuffs. I even give fans who tip for it, the power and control to interactive virtually with the speeds and intensities of some bluetooth connected gadgets. I do plan on starting to cam with a partner starting this year by the end of January.

If I don’t do a show, I get online with a tip menu – which basically tells users “If you send this amount of tokens, you can see me do this”.

My Favorite Content Done So Far

I had a moderator tip for me to put a clamp on my clit while simultaneously holding my Lovense Lush to my clit as well. Best orgasm online – EVER.

Also, one of the coolest private shows was when a fan requested for me to move my hair behind my ears when I had it down and curly.

My name is Koco – the perfect bite size piece of chocolate. I am a cam model who loves to get her viewers off by squirting and stimulating her body multiple ways at the same time. Once I get you going, there’s no stopping until I make you explode with happiness. Let Koco satisfy your sweet tooth!

Follow Koco on

Websites: https://allmylinks.com/WetChocolateBar

Twitter: https://twitter.com/Wetchocolatebar

OnlyFans Content; Koco and Daddy: BDSM Kinks

Images from Koco

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March 9, 2021
Tips To Achieve Orgasms Through Masturbation

My personal thoughts on masturbation is self live is self care! It is important for YOU to know your body before anyone else does! I’ve found it helps me to reduce stress and improve my mood for an overall productive day!

Variety Of Sex Toys I Own

I have a variety of sex toys! Where do I begin? LOL I just recently got a fuck machine for Christmas from one of my OnlyFans clients. What a joy that has been! I also enjoy using anal beads or vibrators in the shower! Those are the best! LOL.

Fingers Or Toys?

Using your fingers is for a quick get off before you start your day. Toys is more of a take a bath, candles and wine type of night. If you are relaxing and enjoying your evening, in my opinion, that’s the best time to take the time to pleasure yourself the right way.

Advantages Of Using A Dildo

I like that I don’t have to do so much work with my fingers! Sometimes, it takes a lot of work to make myself cum and I get tired over time. I enjoy using a dildo because of the different vibrations it offers, as well as the multiple ways to pleasure yourself longer.

Favorite Position For Dildo Play

I love to lay on my back with a dildo. I’ve found it more effective and the best way to achieve a full orgasm longer.

Using Other Toys With The Dildo

Occasionally I’ll use a butt plug for a different sensation or a vibratory on my clit if I’m feeling adventurous and extra freaky!

Tips For First Time Dildo Users

I like to stick to the basics as to not get distract from my overall goal…which is to CUM! Lol

For first time dildo users, I would recommend getting one that is snakeskin and free of anything that might harm or irritate the inside of your vagina. I would also suggest to start small, until you know your body and know what you’d like.

Hi I’m Bekah_ applesoup! Fun Sexy Playful ATL Model! I enjoy traveling and doing photo shoots are modeling over the world ! Come Watch Me Enjoy What I Do By Checking Me Out On All Social Media Platforms As Well As My Company @applesoupco! Appreciate The Support

Atlanta

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March 5, 2021
Tips To Give An Amazing Blowjob

My personal thoughts on blowjobs are that it’s intimate and powerful. It’s still a part of you that you give to someone, and it can also be a fun turn on for both parties. That is if the other party enjoys it. I think there is no in-between, you either love it or hate it.

If done with respect from both and an appreciation, it can be very enjoyable for both parties. Also, it shows off your skills, of your mouth and breathing abilities. LOL especially if deepthroating.

What Defines A Good Blowjob?

I define how a good blowjob as (how) for me, I do it with my all and with passion and intensity. It’s my escape from reality, my fantasy realm and helps me with stress. I’m not in a hurry, I enjoy every moment like it’s the last one. I am eager to show you my passion of giving you oral. I love to impress. I think in my own experience with my relationships, or even one timers I’ve given them, it drives them crazy.

I have been told it’s like a drug they can’t walk away from. Even after break ups, every last one of them have begged their way back and most of the time, the reason is because I’ve been the only one to give it to them that good and with such a feeling they can’t describe other than addicting and they instantly wanna marry the next day. LOL no joke.

My Favorite Technique

Any favorites on techniques when giving head – BREATHE!! LOL. No I’d say just relax and be confident, and take a break. Don’t rush and my lil secret is, always have visine and cough drops on hand, and baby wipes. All are a must, trust me.

My Preferred Penis Size

I like any size really, and I’ll tell you why. There are some guys that have small dicks and they know how to use them. And then on the other hand, there are guys with big dicks and don’t use them well. Personally, as long as you’ve got skills, it’s not about the size.

But I have enjoyed some big ones, not gonna lie LOL. Now for big ones, you just gotta remain calm and breathe and don’t be afraid to say ouch haha. It actually excites most men LOL. Unless they are self conscioss then don’t scare him out LOL.

Oh don’t forget lube!!

How To Deepthroat Easily

I just simply try and breathe when possible, and take a break if necessary. Get a cough drop, gargle but the main thing is to relax the throat and don’t panic. Don’t tense up and don’t think negatively either.

How I Like Men To Finish

I love when a man finishes up the way he wants as long as it’s not in my eyes as much as possible. Reason why is because just much as I feel like he’s being blessed with a blowjob, I am being blessed to receive his cum where he would like to put it.

Tips To Kink Up Blowjobs

I would say, talk dirty as much as possible and if he has a special name he likes, such as daddy or papi then use it. I also say, look up at him as much as possible and show him you love it.

Get kinky with tricks with the tongue and possibly tease him on his tip. Make sure you lick his balls and under them and look up while doing it. For me, I let things flow, especially with the mood.

Shyla Pinkridinghood – Southern Freaky MILF Adult Creator/Entertainer

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March 3, 2021
Women Who Use ‘Gentlemen For Hire’

Consciously or subconsciously, everyone seeks a little comfort in another person.

Sometimes, these ‘other people’ aren’t readily available when we need them the most, and that’s where gentlemen for hire or escorts, as they’re more popularly known, come in for women. Having the ability to fit into whatever role you desire them to play, they’re a lot more important than most people think.

Who Exactly Are Gentlemen For Hire?

Also known as escorts, gentlemen for hire are often mistaken as sex workers due to the stigma around the job. But they aren’t.

Who are they then?

Gentlemen for hire are good-looking, physically fit, and intellectually sound men who have jobs as professional companions. Dinner dates? Company for social events? Mind-blowing conversations? Non-sexual intimacy? Casual company? They’ve got it all, and that’s why women who know what they want and aren’t afraid to get it employ their services.

Why Do Women Hire Male Escorts?

There is usually a lot of controversy surrounding women employing escorts and people keep wondering what the catch is. Why do they do it?

While it’s necessarily not in anyone’s place to critique the actions of grown women, there are several reasons why women book gentlemen for hire.

Control

When we say control, we don’t mean the less than appealing kind or even BDSM, that’s a personal choice. We meant having control over who you invite into your space or life.

Some women have control reasons for wanting sexy strangers to be their ‘shoulder to lean on’ when they need one instead of the men around them.

With Gentlemen For Hire, you decide who you want, what you want them for, why you want them and even where you want them.

It’s all in your hands. It doesn’t come with the uncomfortable feeling of having strings attached or bothering someone who doesn’t want to be bothered.

It’s all on a contract basis.

Whether you want them for purely casual hangout reasons or even more intimate ones like romantic dates, it’s your decision to hire and their choice to get hired.

Nothing is sexier than a woman who knows what she wants!

Companionship

Yes, women can get lonely. Even in a room full of people, loneliness can still creep in. In situations like this, women can get a gentleman for hire to fill the void, provide great company and conversation.

Women who love to experience the joys of companionship and beautiful platonic friendships love to use the escort service because it’s easier and a sure guarantee. When you call them, they’ll definitely be available for you. No disappointments and definitely no delays!

Safety

A quick trip to the bar would probably help a woman pick up company for Friday night, and while that seems cool, there are always safety concerns.

What if he’s a serial killer? Or a rapist? Or even a trafficker? You can never tell, and that’s what makes bar pick-ups and take-homes pretty much less enticing to some women.

With gentlemen for hire, you can be sure of who you’re bringing into your home or going out with since they are usually checked, trained, and registered. With a service like gentlemen4hire, you can be sure of your safety, privacy, and the confidentiality of your information since their escorts are usually well-vetted and trained in the art of pleasing clients and making sure they have a great time.

If you were worried this might not be legal, it’s time to stop worrying because escort services are fully legal.

Meeting New People

Some women just want to have fun and meet new people. It can be an exciting adventure for most women.

Getting to know someone new and just chilling without the added pressure of sustaining the relationship beyond that point can be awesome. It helps you to be less guarded and more open to interesting conversations you normally wouldn’t have with those you know deeply.

Having no expectations can actually do wonders and help you relieve stress or emotional troubles. You get to unpack without any pressure to be perfect or hide since you probably wouldn’t see them again after that time.

Some women want this emotional security and wouldn’t mind paying for it nicely!

Official Purposes

While most of the reasons we’ve explored bother on personal wants, some women hire escorts purely for official work-related reasons.

Some of these could be needing a last-minute date to an office party or event, a meeting where a plus-one is compulsory, or even as dates to a school reunion party. Nobody wants to be the single and sad classmate or co-worker who doesn’t bring anyone to the party.

If there’s no one in a woman’s life who can fit these roles, then escorts are the perfect choice to make a fantastic impression.

Women and their escorts or ‘Gentlemen For Hire’ usually have mutual contracts or agreements they work by that keeps the whole arrangement in check.

Anyone can have a good time, be confident and go get what you want!

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March 2, 2021
How To Explore & Enjoy Bondage

I would say my overall thoughts about BDSM and kink are positive. I’m fairly young in the kink scene but I have had interest in these kind of things for some time now. As long as it is consensual and everyone is safe/aware of the risks, then I’m all for it.

Exploring My Interest In Bondage

My interest in bondage started in my teens. I just enjoyed the thought of being restrained in general. When I was about 20, I was really interested in the art of Shibari. Of course, I had no idea how to do it and where to even begin but, as an artist, I did find a lot of beauty in it.

I really didn’t get to explore bondage until a year ago. I finally immersed myself in my local kink scene and within a few months, I was getting tied up consistently. It just felt natural to me.

Why I Love Being Tied & Gagged

I guess it depends on how tight I’m getting tied and gagged haha. This will of course be subjective but when I’m in a more “comfortable” tie, it is relaxing. I go into a sub space and have a natural high. I also get very silly and joke around.

When I am in an extremely tight or difficult tie, it requires more processing. In something challenging, it is quite easy to panic because things feel difficult and you no longer have physical control. That is when you have to really meditate. I tell myself to stop and relax. I know I trust the person who is tying me and that they will take care of me. I know that if it is ever too much I can always get out. I also had to teach myself how to breathe in tougher ties because once you start hyperventilating, it’s a wrap. That’s a great way to get lightheaded and possibly pass out. It is almost like a mind game where you are constantly giving yourself a pep talk to continue. Once I can get to a calm place where I am meditating, I can then go into sub space and ride the high.

When I get out of those difficult ties, there is a sense of gratefulness that runs over me. I then get this wonderful natural high. I get it after I’m tied every time and it just feels like I got a boost of serotonin in my brain or like I just took some kind of natural upper. I love it! I also sleep really well that night haha.

I guess that is why I enjoy it. It is like a challenge and a way of meditation for me. It also makes me incredible happy and turns me on as well. It doesn’t turn me on to the point of orgasm on it’s own, but it definitely gives me what I need from rope.

My Favorite Bondage Content

I think one of my favorites is one I created with Cinched and Secured. It was the last forced orgasm bondage video for his website. I don’t know if it will be up just yet but there are more like it on his website CinchedandSecured.com. It is obviously my favorite because I love everything to do with forced orgasms. It is just so hot. I definitely recommend it if you like that kind of content too. It is just always a good time with him and our friend ILoveRopeBondage, who also joins us.

Another one of my favorites are some of the videos I do with JJPlush. It is such a turn on to be tied and roughed up by another woman. If you really like girl on girl bondage, then I wholeheartedly recommend checking out her site borntobebound.com.

As for a favorite video of mine that I sell, I think it’s my Birthday Bondage series. I uploaded 25 different bondage videos for my 25th birthday this year. My favorite ones in that one was when I was naked and chained up in my basement. It just had a nice dark and dirty aesthetic. All of those videos are in my ManyVids Store at Jayda Blayze.

Favorite Positions To Be Tied Up

I honestly don’t know if I necessarily have a favorite. I like all kinds of positions in their own way. I do really like to be suspended upside down. I think it reminds me of when I was a kid and I would hang upside down on the monkey bars haha. It’s just relaxing. I like to be suspended in general. I don’t get to do that as much but I really want to explore that more.

Incorporating Sex & Orgasms Into Bondage

I honestly have yet to incorporate sex and bondage. I hope to start doing that soon. As I have mentioned before, I have used toys in bondage in my forced orgasm scenes.

The way I like to incorporate it in my bondage is by using a vibrator or a dildo on a stick. I find them very pleasurable. I don’t have a particular position I have to be in to take the vibrator or dildo. As long as there are access to the holes, then it’s all good haha.

Jayda Blaze – I am a 25 year old, part time art student and a full time fetish model. I produce my own content as well as work with other producers. If I’m not making content, then I’m probably getting tied up, creating art or playing video games.

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February 25, 2021
How To Give A Lady An Amazing Sexual Experience

I believe sex is a beautiful experience, however it is just a biological function at the end of the day. I look at sex like eating, sleeping etc. It’s a necessary function where you are allowed to get creative and show another person how much you appreciate them even if it’s just for their appearance.

What An Amazing Sexual Experience Is To Me

An amazing experience is when all parties can live in the moment. You don’t want it to end. You are matching her rhythm and vocal cords and all parties become one. Everyone feels satisfied afterwards.

What Turns Women On

I find that each individual woman has their own hot spots. You have to take your time with each one and find them. My go to move is going for neck kisses, then down to the breast.

3 Favorite Sex Positions

I love when a woman is riding because she is expressing her desires on you. I also love missionary because of the passion involved. Face to face during sex is one of my favorite positions. I also love that from-the-side early morning position.

Tips To Bring Her To Orgasm

Exercise and take your herbs (Maca root, horny goat weed) so you can last longer. Women love longevity and living in the moment. Listen to the way she screams when you hit certain spots and follow suite.

How I Love To Finish

I love to ask her if she is ready for me to nut then I will ask her where. I always let her decide but my favorite way to finish is creampies.

Mr Side Dude – An amateur film performer with over 100 scenes. Based in the midwest and east coast, he films with beautiful ebony women from all over the U.S.

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February 23, 2021
What To Know Before Having Sex With Your Trans Partner

My thoughts on sex are that, in general, it usually can be pretty complicated. Personally, I’m more turned on by the idea of foreplay that could last for hours. But, whether we like it or not, it also can define a major part of your life. Thankfully, I’ve manage to be pretty damn good at it.

One Misconception About Having Sex With A Transgender Person

That you may not, or wouldn’t enjoy it.

Communication Is Key

As someone who has had quite a few experiences of a guy telling me that I was the first trans girl that they were with or wanted to be with: while some other people might find that endearing, it pretty much kills any kind of sex drive I may or may not have had at that moment.

My advice would be this: communicate that you are 100% clear with the fact that you know he/she/they are trans, but you’re still down to fuck, suck or whatever else pleases the both of you without actually saying it.

Tips When Having Sex For The First Time

Use some type of protection against STD’s, lube is always a good thing to have, and ask what your partner wants done to them; if what they say isn’t something you wanna do, they’re someone you probably shouldn’t be having sex with.

Spice Things Up & Make It Kinkier!

I went through a pretty slutty phase in my late teens/early twenties, so there are a lot that I have done outside of anything BDSM related or having to do anything that comes out of your body.

I’ve been to a sex club before, and it’s something I wouldn’t mind doing all again in the future.

Aphrodyte – I’m 25, born and raised in New York, picked the name Aphrodyte because I’d like to think of myself as a modern day sex goddess. I’ve been told I give the best head more than once, and I can make myself cum multiple times (meaning more than five) in less than an hour. 😉

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Twitter: @xoxaphrodyte

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February 19, 2021
What I Love About Spanking

I think kink and kinky people are great! Kink helps people express themselves and it’s what makes us all unique.

What I Love About Spanking

I have been obsessed with spanking since I was five years old. I am a spanking fetishist, as pure as they come. I had been thinking about spanking for a long time, so when I began indulging in my spanking fantasies when I was 19 years old, everything came quite naturally for me. I had a few different play partners that I switched with, and many of my partners gifted me with implements, and that’s how my implement collection quickly began to grow. I attended my first spanking party (Shadow Lane in Las Vegas) in 2017 and began my professional spanking and modeling career then. I’ve been doing this for over three years now.

I love that spanking is so pure and domestic. I especially love the headspace, pain and passion that goes into each scene. You really don’t need any fancy whips or paddles or implements to do it. All you really need is a willing bottom and a good hand and you’re good to go. But you can also grab a hairbrush off of your nightstand, or whip off your belt. That works too. 😉

Why Is Spanking Popular?

I think spanking is so popular because you can make it any way you want it to be. It can be soft and sensual like a relaxing massage, or disciplinary and harsh, or a blend of both. The butt is so round, so soft, and simply the safest and sexiest place to hit!

Favorite Props For Spanking

It all depends on the situation and if I am topping or bottoming. I personally love anything leather, because the impact feels so divine. When I am delivering a good, hard strapping, it gets me into a wonderful buzzing headspace.

I recently had purchased a new leather belt. I was shopping with my play partner, Miss Rachel, and had her bend over so I could give her a few swats with the belt. She approved and returned the favor, it was a done deal.

I also really love the hairbrush. It is so classic and feminine. You can also carry it around discreetly in your purse, a secret little thrill!

Is There A Correct Way To Spank?

Absolutely. It is important for anyone to know that you must avoid hitting any bones or vital organs. That means don’t be hitting too high (too close to the tailbone) or too low (thighs are okay to hit, but not every bottom enjoys being smacked there, so discuss with your partner). Your main focus is on the fattiest, juiciest area on the behind; just below the equator. Avoid wrapping too far around the side of the butt/hip and striking one cheek more than the other. Keep in mind symmetry and keeping things even. Both sides need love.

Checking in with your partner is key! That goes to say, everyone has their own style. I spank both right and left handed, which helps even things out a lot. As a switch, I think all tops should get a feel for the implement they will be using so you can gauge what the implement feels like and what works and doesn’t.

Recommended Spanking Aftercare

After a good spanking session, I rub lotion on the spankee’s bottom and give them a nice butt massage. I recommend Cetaphil’s body moisturizing cream for very dry, sensitive skin.

Post-spanking, the bottom tends to dry up, so moisturizing really helps restore and repair the skin.

Cassidy Lau – I am a Professional Spanko-Switch and Entertainer and based in Austin, TX. I provide in-person spanking sessions as a top, bottom or switch. You can also interact with me and my real-life Top and spanking partner, Miss Rachel, on our OnlyFans page. We livestream weekly real-life spankings and discuss our home life and domestic dynamics.

Follow Cassidy on

OnlyFans: Onlyfans.com/TheLadiesRoom

Twitter: @SassyXOLassy

Email: SassyXOLassy@gmail.com and LadiesRoomSpanking@gmail.com

Fetlife: SassyXLassy

Upcoming Tours:

Pre-COVID, I had traveled a lot. Assuming things clear up in 2021 with COVID, my travel schedule will be as as followed:
Atlanta, GA: January 15-16
Las Vegas, NV (Shadow Lodge Spanking Party): February 25-28
Dallas, TX (Texas All State Spanking Party): June 24-28
Houston, TX (Lone Star Spanking Party): November 11-14

I am based in Austin, TX but I travel back home to Seattle once a month.

Images from Cassidy Lau

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February 17, 2021
How To Explore & Enjoy Gender Play

Kink has been part of My entire adult life. I am not sure if I am wired that way or if it was finding an old stash of True Detective magazines as a youngster. For those that don’t know, those mags pictured women bound, gagged, etc. My first long term boyfriend was kinky and we explored a lot together but none of it was specifically tied to BDSM.

FemDom didn’t come until later, again at the introduction of a significant other. It was a natural fit, coinciding with a time when I was very engaged in a corporate career. It further boosted My confidence by allowing Me to own My sexuality and take that power of confidence into the workplace. Little is more powerful than a woman who knows the affect she has on you and uses it ruthlessly. I never looked back.

What Is Gender Play?

It’s a broad spectrum form of play and it just keeps getting broader with our exposure to non-traditional gender identities like non-binary, gender fluid, transgender, etc. Regarding My gender play, which is almost exclusively with men, it’s about taking them out of the confines of their born gender – what they are programmed to feel and believe about themselves, and how they identify with their gender.

That can be as simple as donning a pair of panties and teetering around in high heels, to full transformations and getting a public response to them in a feminine role – and everything in between. And it’s more than just the physical aspect. For many, taking on feminine characteristics and wearing womanly trappings pushes their comfort zone, makes them feel out of control and therefore more submissive and that is where D/s play enters.

Gender play often provides a jumping off point for FemDom and BDSM scenarios. Gender play on its own is not specifically part of FemDom or BDSM, in My opinion.

Misconceptions Of Gender Play

The biggest one is that it’s all about humiliation. Up until the last five years or so, I would say that was mostly accurate. At that time, gender play revolved mostly around sissy play and emasculation of the male ego. Now I see more and more men who want to feel empowered by feeling feminine and being viewed as a woman. Because of that, My skills have had to grow. I took lessons in transgender makeup and fleshed out My client wardrobe to include elegant attire too.

The other big misconception is that gender play is only for bi-sexuals. That is an absolute falsehood.

Reasons Subs Loves Gender Play

Well, for most it’s just kinky fun. For sissies, the erotic humiliation gets their juices flowing. For others, shedding their male responsibilities for a few hours and feeling the dichotomy of what women often feel; sexy, desired, objectified, pursued, vulnerable exposed – can be a real rush.

But there can also be a serious side to gender play. I have had more than a few clients that are exploring the possibility of transitioning and a professional dominant can provide the safe space for them to take on that role for a manageable time.

What A Typical Gender Play Session Is Like

I don’t know if there is a true “typical” but nowadays I enjoy the “female empowerment” scenes best. I’ve always felt that using feminization to emasculate a man was unfair to the female ideal. Why should being feminine make you less of a man and therefore humiliated? Shouldn’t a man be honored to be remade in the image of Us? I think that is just one of the ways our thinking is slowly changing.

So, the scenes that involve full transformations and realistic cross-dressing are My current favorite. I love to wait and reveal the final results after everything is done: hair, makeup, dress, shoes, nails, etc. The look on some of their faces is priceless. Of course, the transformation is just the first part of the scene for most. Sometimes we engage in medical play that can result to a trip to the OBGYN table and maybe a mock castration and gender reassignment. Maybe we discover the goddess Venus is resident in them and engage in strap on play. Public outings are always fun and liberating too.

What To Expect Before Exploring Gender Play

As I briefly mentioned earlier, gender play will not make you gay or cause you to question your sexuality in a negative way. Some men get fully dressed for the first time and declare themselves lesbians. Others crave to suck cock, but I don’t think it’s done anything more than bring to the surface what has been swirling around underneath.

As with any form of play, choose your partner carefully. If seeing a professional, make sure they have all the accouctrement you seek. If you want a full transformation, make sure they have a good stock of fem gear and preferably a dedicated feminization area. A verifiable track record of working in gender play is imperative too. Seek out reviews and other information outside of their website to make sure you are a good fit.

In short, do your research, choose well and communicate your desires and limits clearly.

Mistress Ayn – A professional Dominatrix residing in Atlanta, Georgia. She has been part of the BDSM lifestyle for over 20 years and a professional dominant since 2010. In person sessions are conducted at the renowned Atlanta Dungeon and in 2016 she launched the incomparable FemDom Mansion. Mistress Ayn was recognized by her peers for her contributions to the FemDom community as a Guest of Honor at DomCon 2019.

Follow Mistress Ayn on

Website:

https://mistressayn.com/

https://femdommansion.com/

https://www.atlantadungeon.com/

https://stars.avn.com/mistressayn

https://aynrules.com/tour/

http://mistressayn.com/blog/

Twitter: https://twitter.com/MistressAyn

Images from Mistress Ayn

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February 15, 2021