My husband and I are on the weighty side and a lot of sex positions are challenging for us to try. What are some recommendations or tweaks we can do instead of the usual missionary?
You may want to consider having a few of the following little helpers on hand to make different positions more exciting and/or more comfortable.
- Lube is a wonderful sexy tool to have regardless of you and your partner’s shape. Water based or silicone lube is great to have on hand in order to make entry easier for your husband and can make penetration comfortable and safer for you. (If your husband tries to penetrate you when you aren’t lubricated it can be painful and can cause micro-tears in your vagina that can cause infection and we don’t want that!)
- Having firm pillows in the bedroom can make sexual positions easier for you and your husband. For example, sometimes placing a firm pillow underneath your abdomen during doggy-style can make the position more comfortable for you and can increase your stamina.
- Blindfolds and ticklers…okay so this is a 2 in1 suggestion but bear with me. Again, regardless of your size and shape having these sexy toys in quick reach before and during sexy time can be the “tweak” enough that you need to add some fun to positions you already use comfortably now. Sensory toys like blindfolds and ticklers can create different sensations in your body that give you the tinglies from your head to your toes!
Now for the positions; the following are just three of many suggestions to help answer your question. Side and rear entry positions seem to provide the most comfort and pleasure (the most important part) for weighty couples.
- Doggy-style and other rear entry variations are great positions to try to get your sexy on. You can get on your hands and knees on the bed while your husband kneels behind you. As I mentioned earlier, you can use pillows in this position for support. It’s also possible to kneel at the edge of the bed with your face and chest closer to the bed as your husband stands behind you at the edge of the bed to penetrate you.
- Side positions. I’m sure there are plenty of silly names for these types of positions like ‘turtle on its shell’ and others but we are keeping it general here. You could lie on your side, almost like you are in the fetal position, while your partner again kneels on the bed or stands at the edge of the bed to penetrate you. Pillows would be good for these side positions too to either place between your legs to make entry easier or underneath you (depending on how tall your partner is and if they are kneeling on the bed or standing).
- Cowgirl and variations of woman on top positions can maximize G-spot penetration (like rear entry positions) and are good positions to give your husband the opportunity to see you in your gorgeous glory on top of him. If it’s not comfortable to straddle him as he lays on his back you could also squat over him as he enters you and he could thrust from underneath you.
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Nicole Nelson is currently in school obtaining her Masters of Social Work (MSW) from Smith College with a focus on LGBTQ issues and couples/marriage therapy. Nicole hopes to become a certified sex therapist to continue educating clients and helping people advocate for and embrace their sexuality. Read the rest of her profile below and the links to follow her!
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