Author: Natasha Tsarina

Tips For Your First Time
The first time we make love to another person should be special. Note that I use the words “make love”, not fucking, screwing or any of the other hundreds of words that could be used.

All societies in one form or another say that we should do it with the person we love and preferably be married too, but in reality most of us don’t live up to that standard.

My first time was a bit of a disaster. At the time I was in England attending a boarding school and I really liked a guy in the small town where the school was located. We dated for a few weeks during the spring, walking hand in hand and stealing kisses when no one saw us. I was sixteen at the time and he was a couple of years older, and more experienced.

One sunny day he took me to a field and we sat down by a little creek and began making out. One thing led to another and before I knew it I was naked and he was on top of me.

What followed can only be described as disappointing. It was not what I had expected. He wasn’t as exercised as I had thought and was in a hurry. I knew how “things worked” and what I was supposed to do; spread my legs, kiss him and hug him. But my brain froze ones he was inside me and I just lay there like a dead fish. He didn’t last for more than a few minutes before he pulled out and came on the grass. I hadn’t felt a thing, apart from a little pain and his weight over me.

Things didn’t get much better during the following months and when I left school in July I had only done it three times, and none of those times were the earth shattering love making that I had expected.

So, what went wrong?
- I was too shy to talk about what I liked.
- I had no idea what I liked.
- We didn’t use protection.
- We were on a field, not in a bed.
- I was nervous and so was he.
My tips for those of you who are thinking about having sex for the first time are the following:
- Get to know your body. If we don’t know what we like, how can we tell our partners? Spend some time exploring your own sexuality, it is OK to masturbate and learn what turns you on and what doesn’t.
- Talk to your partner. I don’t mean have a meeting, but when you are in the bed and the light is turned off, whisper in his ear what you like. Using sounds will let him know what he is doing right, or wrong.
- Use a bed. Outside or in a pool might sound like fun, but it is not the best place for your first time.
- Use protection. You don’t want to become pregnant or catch a STD during your first time.
- This one is for the guys. Be patient with her. Sex is not like in the porn movies. Girls don’t have instant orgasm as soon as you put it inside them, we don’t moan loudly the first time. Be gently, use your fingers, kiss her, touch her, make her comfortable and feel secure.
- Another for the guys. Don’t try all the positions available. Start with something simple like the missionary, or with her on top. Many women like to be in control, and it might help them relax knowing that they decided how fast and how deep you penetrate them.
- Oral sex is a great way to please each other before penetration. Either you can take turns or use the 69 position. The hornier the woman is, the easier it will be to penetrate her.
- This is for the women. Not all men can last for thirty minutes, most don’t last for more than ten. It is normal if your man comes faster than you, and that’s why it is so important that you both enjoy foreplay before he enters you. The closer you are to an orgasm before he enters you, the more likely it is that he will make you come with his penis.
- Have fun together! Sex is fun and should be enjoyed on equal terms.
I hope this short article has helped you in some way or form. After my disastrous first times, it took me a year until I did it again, and that time was fantastic!

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August 26, 2016
How I began writing erotica

The only romance novel I have ever finished was 50 Shades of Gray, and I didn’t like it very much. I read it because some of my friends were ecstatic about it and I figured I might as well find out what the big deal was. I never figured it out. So, if I have only read one romance novel, how did I begin writing erotica?

I began with a regular book I wrote using a pen name and uploaded it to Smashwords. I have taken it down since then, but I might publish it again one day. I waited and waited, but there were no sales. I did what others did to market it, but nothing. Meanwhile, I read a lot about self marketing and publishing e-books on the internet. I realized that sex sold and people were much more successful writing erotica or romantic novels than regular books.

I sat down and opened a new document on my laptop and stared at it, and it stared back at me. I had writer’s block. This was late spring so I went for a walk and ended up on the beach. I sat there and looked at the people around me and tried to get some kind of idea. There was a single young woman to one side and when a man asked her what time it was I heard her accent was American. I wondered how she had ended up alone on the Island and where she had been before. Then I realized I could use a similar woman in my book. That’s how the Nat Smiley series began.

After publishing Work Experience I got some sales, but it was not much. I began writing the second novella in that series, Room Service. I had read an article about niche erotica and that was something I thought I could do. I used google and searched what others searched for and what came up was; pegging (strap on sex), Incest fantasies, and transgender stories. I looked at my notes and thought, wow, I know nothing about this. I began doing research, signed up for forums and I spent about a month reading and talking to people on the internet. The research produced; TGirls, Family Affairs, and Strap On.

At this time, I had left Smashwords and signed up for KDP, which is an Amazon e-book platform. To me, the biggest difference between the two, apart from Amazon being much bigger, is the technical side of how to get your book out to the audience. Smashwords is easier with less paperwork for us foreign writers, but they have extremely tough formatting rules. Amazon asks for more documentation and it takes a bit longer to set up your account butonce it’s done uploading books is much easier than Smashwords.

Now I use both platforms and Amazon is where I sell more books, but Smashwords let me market my books for free for as along as I want. Since then, I have written parts two and even three of my best selling books. I believe if people like something you should give them more of the same.

What is next? I will write more and as I mentioned on my blog, I want to write a stand alone story with Alex Malone from the Strap On series, I think she is a strong character that can carry a novel length story. Nat smiley will be back in a new adventure this year. I also write on Literotica as NTsarina. It is a free site, but I use it to get feedback from readers and they do a lot of that. Much more than KDP and Smashwords readers combined.

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March 22, 2015
Sizzling Ways to Seduce Your Valentine

When I was a teenager way back in the late eighties, us girls would get all nervous and worried around Valentines Day. We hoped and prayed that special cute guy in the class would ask us out. Later on, being a single young woman I did the same but then it was the guy in the office.

We women often assume or expect the man to ask us out and make Valentine Day special. This editorial goes out to the young readers. We need more “girl power”, you need to take control of Valentine’s Day and ask that cute guy out.

Once you have done it, you have to start planning the evening. Either you can go out and have dinner and then maybe a movie, but if you are in seduction mode, then you need to cook at home or at least use a catering.

Make sure you have plenty to drink at home and that the food is not too heavy. No big steaks or heavy desserts. You don’t want your man to fall asleep on the couch after dinner. Fish, seafood and salads are great.

Dress sexy, but don’t over do it. Let him see cleavage, but not your nipples. If you wear a skirt, keep it short, but he doesn’t have to see your underwear when you open the oven. Be light on the makeup, don’t over do it. Perfumes should be hinted at not bathed in.

Make sure you have done all the prep work before he arrives. That way you won’t get stains on your clothes.

After dinner, sit together on the couch; watch a scary movie so you can snuggle up close to him. Put your hand on his leg and then squeeze lightly at the scary parts. Turn into him, so that he can feel your boobs.

If everything goes as planned you should be making out by the time the movie is half way through. Now it’s the time to be brave. If you feel you will end up making love, do it on the couch. Don’t go hiding away in the darkness of your bedroom. Do it right there and then. Show him you are not shy and that you know what you want, and how to get it.

Undress him, loosen the tie slowly, and then unbutton the shirt one button at the time while you are straddling him. Let you skirt ride up on your thigh. Lean in to kiss him, but pull away in the last minute. Play with him, and have fun.

Do it on the floor, in the armchair or wherever there is space. This is the day of the lovers, so celebrate it.

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February 9, 2015
The Naughty Christmas Girl

Christmas season is around the corner and it’s time to hang up the lights, find the gnomes and get the fake sled out of the basement. It’s a time to be happy and share good times with family and friends. Gorge on unhealthy food and drink too much egg toddy.

It is also a time to be naughty J

When I was in my early and mid-twenties, I would enjoy being the naughty girl at the company Christmas party. Usually I was just a regular young woman doing my job, but once a year I shed the innocent girl look and put on my little short red dress, and fuck me heels. I would move around flirting with my co-workers, my bosses and any other poor man I got close to, even Santa Claus was not safe. I would jump up on his lap and purr in his ear, telling him I had been a good girl all year and I was worth a nice big gift.

Why do I tell you this?

Well, in all Christmas parties there is a girl like this. If it’s a family reunion it might be the long lost cousin, or the sister who lives out of town. At a company event, it could be the silent secretary with the horn rimmed glasses who comes at you in a miniskirt and a deep cleavage.

There are men who do the same thing. Let them have some toddy and Mr. Casanova shines through the innocent front of the office clerk. He will seduce you with snowball fights and building snowmen, then when you least expect it, he will fall with you to the ground where you roll around laughing and giggling until he places a soft kiss on your cold lips.

Some would say the alcohol consumed during Christmas parties is the reason for this behavior, but I say it is only a small part. I think the biggest reason is that, at least for families, it is a time to see people you haven’t met in a long time, and sometimes, your sister’s good looking hubby is just too good, not to flirt with.

Nothing innocent with a little flirt is there? You bet there is, it could ruin the entire evening for everyone.

What about the flirty secretary at the company get together? Same thing there, an innocent flirt with the boss could lead to a quick round of wild sex on the copy machine and that in turn could lead to a very embarrassing meeting the following work day.

So readers, enjoy the holiday season, have a lot of sex, but think twice before you become the flirt at the party.

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December 23, 2014
Awesome Toys: Dildos and Vibrators

When I was walking up from the beach this Saturday, they were cleaning the hotel next to where I live. As I walked by, a cleaning lady in her late fifties came out carrying some boxes. I said hi and she said. “Look at what people buy, just look.”

She showed me one of the boxes and it was a vibrator. I laughed and said. “At least they have fun on their vacations.” The woman stared at me and said, “Fun? They are perverts.” She threw the boxes in a big bin and walked back inside.

There is nothing perverted about owning a vibrator or two. Actually, I think every single woman and couple should have one in the bedroom drawer and I’ll tell you why.

Sex toys are to improve your sex life, not to substitute it. Some men think that if a woman has a dildo or a vibrator, she doesn’t need or want a man. This is completely wrong. Men masturbate using their hands, and so do women, but at some point in time thousands of years ago, someone very intelligent figured out that it would be much more fun to have a penis shaped object to use. The first dildos were made of stone, tar and wood which were very hard and uncomfortable. As humans progressed, other materials were used and today, these are made from plastic, rubber and their derivatives.

If you are a young woman, owning a dildo is a good way to become comfortable with your erogenous zones. You can explore your own sexuality at home any time you want, and thanks to the internet, you don’t even have to go to a sex shop and buy one. You can have it delivered to your door. There is nothing wrong with masturbating and using a toy to give you that extra pleasure.

Couples can explore each other using one and before you say, “Men can’t use a vibrator,” let me tell you, yes they can. I am not talking about asking or telling your man to get on the bed and then sodomize him (he might like it). No, what I’m talking about is something sensual. Place the tip of the vibrator just under his glans and keep it there for a while. You will notice how he begins to squirm and make all kinds of noises and then, he reaches an orgasm. You have driven him to the top and over without using your hands or mouth. The best thing about this technique is that he will take a lot longer to reach an orgasm than if you were to use other methods.

The basic dildo is a cylinder shaped object either in plastic or rubber. I recommend one in latex; very smooth. A vibrator is similar but as the name suggests, it vibrates. You can chose different speeds while you masturbate. Both of these can also be found in the form of a penis, small, medium size or big. I prefer these models because they have the right feeling when used.

You can also use a cock ring which is placed around the base of his penis and will help him maintain an erection for a longer time. I saw one model which had a little vibrating tip, which touched the clitoris when the man is deep inside the woman.

A vibrator is also a great way to warm up before anal sex. The man uses it to massage the woman’s anus so she relaxes and he can enter her easier. On the same topic, remember that a man’s anus is also very sensitive and if you use a small vibrator or just a finger, his orgasm will be much stronger. Most men are not into having their woman stick anything up their bums, but try to convince him. I’m sure he will thank you after. You can even buy a special prostrate massage for even greater pleasure.

Apart from the usual vibrators, dildos, butt plugs, etc., there are handcuffs, whips and all kinds of fun stuff to play with. It all depends on what you are into. A friend of mine likes dressing up for her husband. At times, she is a secretary, a nurse, or a hot waitress.To sum it all up, if you don’t have a vibrator or a dildo at home, get one. If you are into S&M, bondage or anything similar, go shopping for that. Have a masquerade every weekend and dress up. Surprise each other, people!

A final note for the man who wants to buy a vibrator for his lady: Do not assume that we like that big 12 inch thing, most of us don’t. Buy something of a normal size. That way, we can really enjoy it and if we want, we will ask for something bigger.

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December 4, 2014
Mistress

So, you want to be a mistress? Or maybe you already are.

Life as a mistress has its ups and downs like everything else in life. The ups are that if your man is wealthy, he will buy you gifts, set you up in an apartment and even buy you a car. The down side is that you never know when you will see him, and those lonely days and nights lying in your bed wondering what he is doing might drive you crazy. Then there is the wife. Has he told you he will leave her for you, or are you just a little toy he keeps on the side for eternity or until he gets bored. Does he have a string of mistresses around? How would you know?

There are certain ground rules to become a mistress. First, you have to be willing to share him with his wife and maybe another mistress. Two, always be happy. A man who wants a mistress has issues at home. Maybe the wife is nagging at him; maybe she is not as good looking as she used to be. There are many reasons, but they all have something in common, they make him not want to be at home. When you see each other, you always have to be smiling and have a positive attitude. That might be hard if your day is going bad, but it’s what he expects from you. Three, you can never become possessive with him; never ask where he is going, or where he has been. After all, YOU are the secret. You can never call him to his house or his cell phone; he might be with his family or another woman. Even if he has a special phone just for you, you still have to be careful. The wife won’t know about it and if he by accident, forgot it in his pants and his pants are hanging in the closet, and you call. Guess what, busted! The wife will hear it if she is at home.

I have been a mistress a couple of times. Not because I wanted to, but because the man I met didn’t tell me he was married or engaged, or had a girlfriend. He kind of “forgot” to tell me that part.

What to do if this happens to you? Go home, sleep on it and the next day, decide if you want to get into the situation, or if you prefer a simple life, without the stress.

“But, he loves me,” you say. Sure, he does, at least that’s what he tells you. If you think about it, he is cheating on his wife or girlfriend, what says he won’t do the same to you when you are officially together?

If you want to know how to make him happy, ask him what he doesn’t like about his wife or girlfriend. Let’s say he hates the way she cooks, make sure you can cook at least a few good meals. If he doesn’t like the way she gives him a blow job, make sure you know exactly how he wants it.

I have learned that most men cheat, not because they don’t love their wife, but because they want something she doesn’t have or can’t provide. Be it better and wilder sex, or just conversation, but it is always something you can put your finger on.

If any men are reading this, be straight with your mistress. If you just want to have fun and hanky panky, tell her. Don’t leave her hanging and wondering if you will get that divorce or not.

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July 7, 2014
Is Coming of Age Bothering You?

The other day I was sitting reading the paper with a coffee and watching people stroll by when I saw a man I hadn’t seen in a long time. We can call him Peter. Peter is in his mid seventies and is a retired accountant. He spends most of the year in sunny Spain and a few weeks back in England where he is from. He has been a widower since several years. I met Peter at a BBQ a couple of years back and I found him an easygoing man with a lot of fun stories to tell. We don’t live close to each other, but we always run into one another a few times a year.

Peter might be old, but he is not dead, and every summer he finds some nice young girl to keep, yes, he is a sugar daddy. I have met a couple of his previous girls and they are all in their mid twenties and very good looking.

When he saw me sitting alone, he asked if he could join me, and after the usual chit-chat I noticed he looked a bit off. He had a vacant look on his face, and seemed to be a bit down. I asked him what was going on and this is what he told me.

He had met a new girl a week or so before and she had moved in with him in his villa. Everything was going great until one afternoon. He had been to the grocery store and had told her he would visit a friend after. The friend wasn’t at home so he got back earlier than planned. When he entered the living room, he found his girlfriend on the sofa watching a porn flick on the plasma screen. He was surprised since he didn’t own any porn movies.

When she noticed him; instead of turning off the movie she let it play and began to tell him how hot she was and how much she wanted him. Naturally, he went along and after the sex he asked her where she got the movie from. She told him she had downloaded it on his laptop and then burnt a DVD.

When he finished the story I asked him what the problem was. Obviously the girl was into him. He said that while having sex on the sofa, she kept watching the movie, and he felt she got more turned on by what she saw than from him. He was worried that she needed to see younger guys to get turned on and to have sex with him.

I thought for a while and realized he might be right. Some people say that women don’t like porn, but I disagree. I think certain types of porn are not exciting for women. Personally, I hate when they spit on cocks or anuses to lube them. I think it’s nasty, but that’s my opinion. I tend to like movies with some kind of backstory, (I know, they are hard to find), but something that moves the story forward. I like to see young, hot, and well hung men. I like lesbian scenes or three sums.

Over the years, I have enjoyed a good porn flick with a boyfriend, but I don’t remember watching it as a substitute for him. What I mean is that I don’t need the movie to be turned on. It is more of a combination of being with him and watching. A bit like ice cream and chocolate sauce, both are good on their own, but better together. I can also enjoy a movie by myself and get turned on, but it’s not something I do often.

I told Peter that if what happened really bothered him, he should talk to the girl and explain what he felt. He said that in the end, it didn’t really matter since she was just a summer fling. When he left I watched him go, and I felt a bit sorry for him. I guess he had realized that maybe it was time to give up the sugar daddy act and accept he was at an age where he might not excite young women any longer, and maybe try to meet someone his own age.

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June 3, 2014
Finding that Perfect Style

Where I live we are slowly moving into summer and as the weather becomes warmer so does the water in the sea and the pools. Women look for new bikinis and bathing suits and the men try on their shorts from last summer, hoping they still fit.

It is that time of year to decide if you are going “Old School” with a big “Bush” or go “Porn” and shave it all. Of course, there are many versions in between so it’s all up to you and what you prefer. If you have a man or a woman in your life you might want to ask them what they like and maybe do some research on the net to see different styles.

Many of us women keep the same style all year around and this is what I want to talk about in this article.

Personally, I prefer a nice “landing strip”, nice and short. I’ve shaved it all off a few times, but for sme reason I felt uncomfortable, it didn’t look natural. I know some ex-boyfriends of mine were all into the “Porn”. They thought it looked sexy and cool and used a bunch of other adjectives to describe it. I asked them if they would like me to shave them completely clean and their mouths turned into O’s and they slowly backed away. Why not? I would ask and they answered that guys should have hair and other lame excuses. When I asked them why, specifically, they preferred their woman to be shaved, they would laugh and say something about getting less hair in their mouths. I pointed out that women also get hair in our mouths if the guy has a jungle down there, but according to these guys it was not the same thing.

I like a man to have his natural hair where it is supposed to be. Now, don’t take me wrong, pubic hair should be cut short and neat. Some men shave their chests, I don’t like that. If they are not swimmers at Olympic level they don’t need to streamline their bodies. What about hair on the back and shoulders? OK, here I do like to say a visit to a beauty salon or SPA where they do a good wax job would be a good idea.

I believe that with the internet men have become used to seeing women with no hair and they expect their girlfriends and wives to do the same. Let me tell you, apart from waxing, it takes time and dedication to keep it smooth, it is not easy. Having said that, I also like to have my man to take care of himself and don’t leave me with the “Amazon” when I go down on him.

I’ll keep my landing strip and hopefully some nice 747 or Airbus will come in for a landing one of these days.

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May 20, 2014
Being a Tease sometimes gets you nowhere

Last Saturday, when I was walking down the stairs in my building, I met one of my neighbours. She is a lovely girl in her mid twenties. She has lived in the building for a few years and we sometimes have a coffee together or share a bottle of wine. I could see that she had been crying and I asked her what had happened. She told me the guy she was dating had just dumped her. When I asked her why, she said he had told her he could not take any more of her games. I knew immediately what had happened. Let’s call her Maria. Maria likes to tease. With teasing, I mean in a sexual way. She once told me she loved making a guy hot and wanting her, and then leave him hanging. I guess this guy got tired of it and left her. After some small talk I continued on.

When I was in my late teens and early twenties, I did the same as Maria. I would meet guys and then turned them on just to leave them with their dicks hard and no fun. I guess I did it to feel I had power over them and that they wanted me. Some would beg me to let them get their way and release the pressure building in their balls. At the time I was no virgin, far from it. Maybe it was just my own insecurity as a young woman that brought on this behaviour. Many of my friends would do the same thing and we would laugh and make fun of the poor guys.

Then I met a man, we can call him John. John was in his late thirties and gorgeous. He had a beautiful apartment, a nice car and was a good dresser. We would go out and dance, and eat together. I really liked him, but I could not let go of my wicked ways. When we would snuggle up on the sofa and he would kiss me I would play along and go as far as touching him over his pants. I would let him touch my tits and run a hand up my thighs, but never touch any important parts. This went on for weeks. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to have sex with him. I just thought that I had more control over him by doing what I did.

After a couple of months into the relationship he invited me for a late lunch at his apartment. When I arrived, he had roses waiting for me and a box of chocolates for dessert. He had made a beautiful shrimp salad, and there were two bottles of white wine in the fridge. I had dressed for the occasion in a white summer dress, no bra and only bikini panties. I knew he could see my nipples press against the fabric and I loved it. He was in jeans and a polo shirt showing off his strong body.

After we ate, we had coffee and dessert on the balcony looking out over a park. We had finished almost all the wine and I was tipsy. I figured this was the day I would let him go all the way so I began to run my hands over his chest and we kissed. The kiss became deeper and we moved inside. He was so hot and so was I we never made it to the bedroom. He took off my dress and I helped him out of his jeans. When we were both naked, I lay down on the floor and he knelt between my legs. His cock was hard and I couldn’t wait to try it. He lay down over me and I felt him press against me and sighed with pleasure.

Then he stood up and began to dress, I asked him what was wrong and he said nothing, but I should get up and get dressed. I didn’t understand what was happening, I felt so exposed there lying naked on the wood floor, my legs spread and my most secret spot open and wet. He looked down at me and said, “Get up, get dressed, and get out of here.” Shocked, I asked, “Why? What did I do wrong? You can’t leave me like this.” He just looked down at me and with a sigh he said. “Now you know how I have felt for the last months. You are a tease, and I want nothing to do with you.”

When I took the elevator down I had tears in my eyes, I felt so stupid, and so frustrated. But I had learned my lesson; you could only go so far before the guy has had enough.

I am not saying it is wrong not to want to have sex, but if you don’t want because of a specific reason, tell the guy, don’t play games. Dress as sexy as you want, but don’t lead him to think he might get something you know he won’t.

Read more articles and points of views from Natasha here. Photos courtesy of Shutterstock.

March 29, 2014
Let the Dirty Talks Boost Your Sex Life

“Make love to me honey” or “Fuck the shit out of me”. Which is the best way to tell your man (or woman) what you want them to do to you?

In my experience, there is a time for everything. After a romantic night out and cuddling up on the sofa, maybe the first option is the better. Then again, what if you just met someone in a club and you are both a little tipsy and you can feel his hard on through his jeans just waiting to get into you, then the second option might be the better one.

I have always been outspoken and never afraid of telling men what I wanted and how I wanted it. Even when I was in my early twenties I would surprise my boyfriend with romantic outcries like “stick that thing in me baby” or “take me harder”, or even a “let me taste you”. A lot of times these little things made the man look at me in confusion and sometimes I could spot a bit of fear in his face, like if he was thinking; “what kind of porn actress have I got here?” I was actually dumped by a guy because he couldn’t handle my choice of words.

This brings up the topic of this article; when is it appropriate to use those strong adjectives?

In my experience it’s all about the situation and what kind of guy you are with. Like I mentioned in the beginning, if you are having a romantic evening and have just come home, then it might be better to use some softer language. At the same time, if you have just met someone, there might also be a good reason to be careful of the words you use; you don’t want to give the wrong impression on your first date, even though your body screams for him to take you hard against that cold backstreet wall.

When you have a stable relationship it is always fun to mix it up a bit. I used to date this guy and we had a little game going. When he would pick me up for a night out I would always greet him at the door dressed to kill. High heels, short skirt, make up and the sexy lingerie. I would then invite him in for a drink and just before leaving he would fuck me against my kitchen table. Just pull up my skirt and stick it in me. Meanwhile we would both be using some very juicy words. Why did we do it like that? Well, we were both working stressful jobs and I guess it was a way to get rid of the build up from the week to be able to relax together.

Men watch and read more porn than women do, and in porn the girls almost always use some pretty dirty language. For younger guys this might make them believe that is the way a woman should be in bed. Wrong. If a man makes us hot enough we will, out of pure horniness come out with some very detailed adjectives on what we would like him to do to us.

In the end, it’s all about the situation and the company you have, but never be afraid to let go of that hidden porn actress deep inside you and let your man know that you want him to make you scream like never before.

Regards

Natasha

February 27, 2014