SimplySxy

Category: LGBTQ

  • SEX. PARTY.

    SEX. PARTY.

    Who Needs Romance When You Can Just Have the Sex?

    Valentine’s Day is beyond cheesy. There. I’ve said it.

    Sure, I am all up for celebrating love and that fine romance (and cheese), but definitely not on this day, which has become too commercialised to the point that retailers are obviously milking it for all its worth by marking up the prices of their items and coming up with annoying “Valentine’s Day” promotions. Don’t waste all that hard-earned money, boys and girls! (Findings show that Singaporeans are some of the biggest spenders on V-Day. Tsk tsk.)

    So, instead of observing the 14th of February as how the mainstreamers have marketed and perceived it to be – lovey-dovey saccharine sweet to the point of diabetic – why not turn the day on its head and make it an Anti-Valentine’s Day instead? And what’s the polar opposite of romance? Why, the answer is sex, of course. And it’s not just sex (singular), but lots and lots of unabashed, no-strings-attached sex.

    Also, since Valentine’s Day is supposedly all about that one person in your life, and we are all about making a 180 degrees turn here, Anti-Valentine’s Day shall thus be about le sex with multiple partners. Maybe even all at the same time. You know what this means, right?

    SEX. PARTY.
    Now this is one sexperience that I have yet to try (no, going to saunas is not equivalent to sex parties; at least not for me). I have always been curious about the mechanics of it all: how and where do you gather the participants? Where will it be held? How long does a party last? Must the number of tops, bottoms and/ or flexes be proportionate to each other? Who will be the one to provide the safety equipment? Is it a bare-it-all from the get-go or do people walk around in their underwear first? Is it safe? Will the police ever find out and raid such shindigs? What about the hotel staff and people staying there? Will they not be curious? And these are just some immediate questions off the top of my head!

    The idea of a sex party (aka orgy/ gang bang/ what have you) is not unheard of, not an entirely new phenomenon, and is most certainly – at least nowadays – not that overtly hush hush, especially in today’s context. In fact, I have heard stories of such parties taking place here in the sunny island that sets in the sea. (Again, those recent news about brothels in neighbourhood estates do not count. We are talking about a party, not a mechanical barter sex trade.)

    One of my exes frequented these sex parties (don’t ask me if the ex still attends them now) and from what I have gathered, the whole set-up is not as sleazy as you may think. Most of the time, these parties are held in swanky, five-star hotels. Participants from all walks of life either get personally invited or register their interest to attend to the lead organiser. Time and date has already been set prior; all you need to do is show up and have fun. Naturally I followed that up with even more questions: how do you indicate to the other party your interest in them? What if the two of you turned out to be of the same role? And, the most important question that kept running through my head: do you do it in full view of the other participants, or do you do it somewhere secluded? Because I am thinking that the only place where you can have private access is clearly the (spacious) bathroom!

    Even after pressing my ex for the answers to my questions, I am still left unsatisfied. Thoughts start running through my head. Is it as classy as what Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman attended in Eyes Wide Shut? Or is it more of a fun affair, like the ones Billie Piper had been to while sharing with us her Secret Diary of a Call Girl? Or maybe it’s just sex-OTT like in the pornos, complete with chains, leather, whips, handcuffs and all? Hmmm.

    With my curiosity having been immensely piqued, I suppose it is finally time to get down to that item on my sexperience bucket list and participate in at least one sex party by this month; my Valentine’s sexlist, if you will. Maybe I will end up with like-minded individuals who believe in the same Anti-Valentine’s sentiments as I do. Then we can do it all through the night (or day, depending on what time the party is being held.)

    Like I said: who needs romance when you can just have the sex?

    Image courtesy of Shutterstock
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  • Unexpected Valentine

    Unexpected Valentine

    Oh that Rick! What a friend! What a guy!!

    I’m visiting Rick in San Francisco for three days. Jeff, our actor friend in El Lay, calls excitedly this morning to tell us he’s on TV tonight, featured in a spot on a major soap opera, so I stay in to watch the show, which is scheduled for 9 p.m. It’s an inconvenient time, because it’s impossible to go out for dinner before, and afterwards it’s too late. Then, too, the timing is wrong for a real movie either before or after, consequently one small segment of a soap opera interferes with the entire evening. Another friend who promised to call didn’t keep his promise, so I take that as an omen, in addition to feeling a certain sense of loyalty to Jeff, and decide to stay in with a book to read –even though it’s the night before Valentine’s Day, and I figure there will be Major Action in the streets, in the bars, in the clubs or everywhere, despite the fact that it’s a Sunday night.

    At 8:30 Rick arrives with a spectacularly good looking fellow. Rick introduces the friend, Brad, whom he’s just met at the Jackhammer, a leather bar in the Mission District. Brad is about twenty-two, six foot three, lean, with short blond hair, smooth fair skin, wearing tight jeans, no shirt, black boots, and a leather jacket. After a bit of idle chat, Rick and Brad go downstairs to Rick’s Rec Room (which has become equally famous – or infamous – as Rick’s Wreck Room) while I stay upstairs in the guest room with book and TV. Rick says maybe they’ll come up and watch the show, but I have my doubts, assuming they’ll be otherwise engaged.

    At 8:55 I turn on the TV to watch the soap opera. It’s completely idiotic, and Jeff’s appearance lasts about two seconds. His opening moments are fine, and I watch the rest of the show, expecting he will reappear, but he doesn’t. Meanwhile, Rick and Brad are downstairs having a much better time, I’m absolutely certain, than I am. I feel I’ve made a mistake, both by staying in and by watching the stupid TV show, and I feel ripped off by my loyalty to Jeff. It occurs to me to telephone him and ask how much he gets paid for acting stupid on a show that’s already idiotic, but I check the urge and keep my bad attitude to myself for a change.

    Just after 10, there’s a tap at my door. Rick is standing there, handsome, muscular, and naked except for his suntan from Costa Rica and a towel in his hand. He says: “I told Brad you’d give him a blowjob. Come on downstairs. He’s waiting for you.” Incredulous, I ask: “Are you kidding?” From the look on his face, I can tell he’s not kidding, so I abandon the book and take off my shirt, muttering half out loud: “I’m not quite sure what to wear.” “You’re fine! You’re just fine!” he assures me. “But…but…” I stammer. “But what?” says Rick. “But have you finished with him?” I have to ask. Rick smiles enigmatically and replies: “I’ve gone as far as I can go. Now it’s up to you.” Scarcely believing my good fortune or Rick’s generosity, as well as wondering what Brad’s attitude might be about this whole thing, I accept the invitation, of course, telling Rick “Thanks!” and he answers: “Thank Brad, don’t thank me.” Then I descend the stairway and go into Rick’s Rec Room. The room smells of sex and poppers. Brad is on the bed, lying on his back, naked except for a leather collar and a cock ring. His eyes are wide open, he has a delicate, slightly rococo armband tattooed on his upper arm, and his long, lean body, in complete repose, is clearly receptive. “What a pretty picture!” I say, almost in awe. Rick agrees, adding: “He’s a beautiful man!” Brad doesn’t say anything. He doesn’t have to. I sit on the edge of the bed and begin to run my fingers over Brad’s tight, flat belly. Rick goes to the top of the bed near Brad’s head, leans over, and begins to kiss him. Brad moans gently, and his cock begins to swell. I put my mouth on the head of it and taste a savory combination of sweat and lube. His hips began to rock under me, and as Rick kisses him and plays with his nipples, I gently begin to suck on his cock and lift his balls. Rick gives us each a hit of poppers, and the three of us begin to make love in wondrous synchronicity. As I suck on blond Brad, I can see Rick’s dark cock getting bigger and bigger, and I wish I could suck on them both at the same time.

    The unspoken message is to please Brad, so together Rick and I pay our separate and various attentions to Brad, who remains surprisingly recumbent and passive. Gradually, we get him, as well as ourselves, hotter and hotter. Suddenly Rick stands up and exits the room, leaving me unexpectedly alone with this tall, exquisite youth. For a moment I feel like a usurper. I’m confused, wondering: Why am I here? How did this happen? Do I deserve this extraordinary feeling of trust? Why is Rick sharing him? Why has Rick left? The moment of doubt passes, and I begin simply to enjoy the feelings. Brad loves to be touched, anywhere, everywhere. His skin is flawless, his chest perfection, and his responses to my touch on his skin are almost orgasmic. So much so I wonder what drug he might be on. I run my fingers and lips over his body, and he throbs in response. I suck on his balls and run my hands over his legs. In turn, he draws up his left leg, inviting access to his innermost parts, and slowly, gently I put my right hand into his ass, all the while playing with his upper body and flat belly with my left hand and continuing, the whole time, to suck on his cock, which gets harder or softer, in my mouth, in gradual sequences. At one point, Brad puts his left hand around his cock and begins to play with it, watching as I bite his nipples and play with the rest of his body. I put my hand in his butt once more, and he shoots his wad, wordlessly, all across his flat, muscled belly. I rip off my T-shirt and underwear, grease up my dick, and masturbate on top of Brad’s recumbent form, as he looks up at me. Rick returns, puts his arms around me first, from behind, then hugs us both and leaves the room once again. It is reassuring and odd at the same time.

    Brad still has his hand on his cock, and the sight of this beautiful man lying under me makes me crazy. I shoot off in what seems only an instant, and we lie there, close together, and with my fingertips I rub the cum into that tight, youthful body until it disappears into his skin. Brad says: “I’m cold,” and pulls the covers over him, then goes into a sleep-like trance. I get a drink of water and go upstairs to look for Rick, who is stretched out on my bed, naked, suntanned and spectacular, calmly looking at the book I had abandoned an hour or two earlier. We compare notes about Brad’s astonishing beauty. Rick tells me how he first perceived Brad in the bar, bare-chested, his jacket hanging off one shoulder, tall and so incredibly stunning that no one dared approach him. Always ready for a challenge, Rick set his sights on the unknown boy, shined his magic light, and within moments they’ve left the bar together to come back to the house for a drink, etcetera.

    Now it’s two hours later. Rick and I agree that Brad was On Something, but neither of us can determine exactly what it was. Maybe a little pot; maybe a bit of speed, too. Probably a mixture. In any case, he’s extremely high and astonishingly sensitive to touch; no doubt that’s why he more or less passed out. We go back downstairs to look at him, try to get him to talk, which he doesn’t or can’t, and Rick opines, not unhappily: “I think Brad’s going to stay the night.” Five minutes later, much to our surprise, Brad awakens and gets up.

    Each of us has a shower, we have a drink and talk for a few minutes in the kitchen. Brad doesn’t have a lot to say, and it doesn’t matter. I ask him why his skin is so sensitive. He smiles a slightly shy, dazzling smile, and replies ingenuously: “I guess that’s something I get from my mother.”

    Everyone says goodnight, Rick drives Brad home, and I change the sheets, which are a mess, but that’s why God invented washing machines, isn’t it? Then I make up Rick’s bed and leave a chocolate for him on the pillow, as at any good hotel. That’s the very least he deserves.

    Counting my blessings, I’ve determined that Rick has gone St. Valentine one better. His behavior is not exactly saintly, and he has no inclination whatever to become St. Rick. Nor does this have anything to do with sentimentality or sweethearts or Victoria’s Secrets or heart-shaped, red candy boxes. Nonetheless, Rick’s generosity, charity and cleanliness are beyond, if not above, godliness, and tonight’s gift was as unique, unforgettable, and spontaneous as it was – how shall I say? – deeply appreciated. Furthermore the night before Valentine’s Day is not yet over, and tomorrow night, if we choose, there’s still plenty of time to Go Out!

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    Image courtesy of Shutterstock
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  • Alone for Valentine’s?

    Alone for Valentine’s?

    Alone for Valentine’s? You CAN Still Get Off…

    … with yourself. Who says that you have to be partnered and who has the audacity to condition you into thinking that Valentine’s Day is only for lovers? As you will know if you have read my column here on SimplySxy before – I am a great fan of masturbation. I am also a believer in the art of self-love so let’s get to it…

    Picture it: Valentine’s Day 2015, you, yourself and a box of tricks 😉 Draw the blinds, turn the lights down low and get yourself ready by taking a romantic bath with flickering candles and soft music in the background.

    And if you’re struggling to picture that, if you can’t quite see how to make that much effort ‘just’ for yourself, allow me to tell you a story…

    Once upon a time I was in the supermarket where I go very regularly and the girl at the checkout knows me well. I was putting my produce of a huge turkey, candles, bottle of Champagne, sumptuous dessert and various entrées and nibbles onto the conveyor belt and as she was scanning the items she said:

    ‘Expecting company?’

    ‘No’ I replied

    ‘I thought you lived on your own?’ said the cheeky cashier.

    ‘I do. This is all for me. I’m taking myself to dinner’ she looked a little shocked, then confused. It seems that we as human beings are looked upon as ‘odd’ when we show ourselves some lovin’. I find this incredibly sad. I also find it depressing that so many of us actually dread ‘VDay’ – sounds a little like ‘D-Day’ don’t you think?

    So how can you take a tip or two from my supermarket experience? Can you take yourself to dinner on Valentine’s and make love to yourself all night long? I’ve written loads about masturbation and how to get you off but I have also written loads about how loneliness can kill us from the inside out. Let’s put a stop to that right now and realise that we are worth it.

    Let me just give you a few more practical hints to get you going…

    You know that ‘box of tricks’ I mentioned? Well you can turn this into a treasure chest by placing your favourite sex toys, underwear (man) lingerie (woman), cock rings, clit teasers, candles, scented oils and maybe even your favourite DVD and/or magazine which may or may not be porn related. Whatever floats your boat. Then… keep the box for special occasions just as you would save your special underwear for that special guest.

    Tonight you are that special guest. You are in for a treat…

    Do as I described previously: dim the lights and get yourself in the mood to really take the time to enjoy your body and your evening alone with the best person you know: you.

    Please do also take a look at my previous articles here on SimplySxy on Masturbation, which will take you to the place few have been – a place so special it would be a shame to miss out by distracting yourself with a night on the town. You can go out on the town anytime – make this night for YOU.

    Choose this moment on this day to really remind yourself what love is all about. Don’t get drawn into all that commercialised crap and simply be the sexy loving human being that you are. I trust you … Yes: I do 🙂

    Image courtesy of Shutterstock
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  • Aunt Leona’s Birthday Party

    Aunt Leona’s Birthday Party

    Yesterday, June 2nd, was Aunt Leona’s 82nd birthday. Last week I asked her if she’d like me to have a party for her, and she said no. I suggested a small dinner instead might be preferable as a celebration, and again she said no.  Then I went to the desert for the long Memorial Day weekend, returning late Monday night, at which point she telephoned saying she’d changed her mind and that she did indeed want a party. She decided to invite four people, then waffled about when the party should take place: whether it should be on Wednesday, the actual day of her birthday, or whether it should be the next weekend, or perhaps the following week, because she hadn’t made up her mind soon enough to give advance notice, etc. etc. Knowing that this event could loom large on the horizon if something weren’t decided quickly, I told her I believed the party should be on her veritable birthday, that we should get on the phone instantly and invite the people we wanted. If they could come, Fine, and if they couldn’t, Too Bad! She agreed, the guests were invited, and I spent the next day shopping, cooking, and preparing.

    Karen arrived an hour before the party was to begin in order to help me set up. Instead of setting up, we sat on the porch and drank martinis. Jon and Jeff had offered to bring Aunt Leona, and when they were half an hour late, we concluded that they’d either decided or been asked to redo her outfit, and sure enough, an hour after that, they arrived, the three of them. Leona was in black from head to toe, glowing, with her newly cut white hair crowning the somber ensemble, in complete contrast to her personality, which is as mischievous as ever. She loved describing her change of attire after fashion consultants Jon and Jeff got to her door.  Jon was elegant wearing a dark silk shirt with fine linen trousers, and Jeff very handsome in a blue, mock workshirt with pearl buttons, chino trousers, and a high-fashion tan leather belt with a silver buckle. They entered giggling, because she had greeted them wearing different shoes on each foot, asking which one they preferred.

    Two of the people Aunt Leona invited, Tom and Tim, arrived even later. Tom, whom she calls “The Tomster,” is a refined, delicate young man of about twenty-five, whom I’d met once before at Leona’s house. He’s clever, bright, and good-humored, as well as just a little fey.  His other half, Tim, surprised me in that he looks as if he could be Tom’s brother. They are both the same age, slender, delicate and handsome; both have abundant dark hair, fair skin and wear elegant, casual clothes with great style. As they walked in, Jeff whispered: “Awfully Junior League, aren’t they?” and two minutes later, Karen, appraising their entrance on her own, cupped her hand and muttered quietly in my ear: “Girls!”

    We enjoyed drinks, hors d’oeuvres and small-talk outside on the deck. Several of the guests arrived even later than Tom and Tim; as a result, cocktails were served at some length.  I’d placed pâté, crackers, almonds and cheese on a stool for easy access. When Wayne arrived, Leona asked him to sit with her, moved the cheese off the stool, and announced that cheese doesn’t require a seat.

    By then the evening air had taken on a chill; consequently I changed my original plan to have dinner outside around the picnic table. The interior dining table is too small for a large group, so it was decided at the last minute to serve a buffet. We arranged pillows on the floor by the coffee table with candles and wine goblets nearby; chairs were pulled up to make a comfortable circle for those who wanted them, and the meal was presented with complete informality, creating an intimate atmosphere conducive to good conversation among a group of people who were not all previously acquainted.

    Talk was spirited, sometimes silly, and always amusing. Jeff told me he overheard Aunt Leona ask Karen, with some puzzlement, in the kitchen: “Tom and Tim, are they awfully Junior League?” Karen answered, “I don’t know. What’s Junior League?” After the meal and before birthday cake and presents, we continued to sip our wine and converse. Someone asked Tom how he and Tim had met, they exchanged glances, and Tim exclaimed: “Oh, we’re not going to tell THAT story, are we?” Everyone said: “I hope so!” and we all urged them on. In response, together they recounted how they had met in college, then became room-mates and good friends, but not more than that. After graduation, they made a date for a night on the town, and rather late in the evening, after several stops and diverse entertainments, decided to go to a bar called The Louie, located near a downtown freeway in a somewhat questionable neighborhood. The patrons of The Louie usually leave their cars at an adjacent parking lot which is well lit and supervised by an attendant furnished by the club. For some reason, the attendant was out of sight as they parked, and before they realized what was happening, the car was surrounded by four muscular black men armed with knives who told them to get out and start walking. They were hustled across a footbridge over the freeway, where the thieves took their car keys, money, wallets, and finally, all their clothing. They were left naked, in a state of shock and terrified, in a dangerous part of the city. We all wondered: what happened? The answer: they burst out laughing and fell in love. There was nothing else to do. It was too late to knock on a stranger’s door, they were doubtful about walking around naked, and they weren’t certain what course of action to take.  Fortunately, soon after, a woman drove by, took pity on them and provided them with a sheet to wear. (She happened to have a sheet in the car because she was in the process of moving.) Too frightened to ask two naked men into her car in the middle of the night, she told them to wait right there, that she’d call the police from a pay phone and not to worry. Later on, the police arrived; were characteristically neither sympathetic nor friendly, but eventually returned the boys home. The car was not found until weeks later, completely trashed, and ever since, Tom and Tim have been sweethearts.

    It was a sensational story, and no one could top it, so cake was served and Leona was presented with her birthday gifts. The last one to be opened, a surprise from Jon and Jeff, proved to be a life-size, inflatable man-doll, with an open mouth, a similar size opening at the crotch in front, and another similar size opening at the backside. With the doll, although packaged separately, was an oversize phallus, dismembered and wrapped in cellophane, cleverly designed to fit into any of the doll’s orifices: mouth, crotch, or backside, in any direction. We blew up the doll-man and inserted the cellophane-covered phallus into the normal front position, so it appeared as if he were wearing a condom. Jeff introduced him as Doc Johnson. Aunt Leona grabbed him by the cock, shook it admiringly, and said “Pleased to meet you.”

    Then we sat him on a chair while we continued talking and laughing hilariously. When it came time to leave, Aunt Leona grabbed him again by the cock, waved him in the air, and said:  “Come on, Honey.  Let’s go home!” Then she delicately took Jon and Jeff, each by one arm; still holding on to Doc Johnson. Off they went, the four of them out to the jeep, three of them giggling into the night.

     

    Image courtesy of Shutterstock
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  • SongKran9: A gay love story

    SongKran9: A gay love story

    Come April, Thailand will be the host to Asia’s largest gay circuit party. Songkran9 is a three day circuit party event organized by gCircuit. This year, Songkran9 will span from 10 to12 April. This massive event will include three night parties and two pool parties with established DJs from around the world. One can expect to hear great music, see hot go-go dancers and meet wonderful people while parting the night away. gCircuit has created a solid brand that is known to all those who love to party.

    The gCircuit brand is also synonymous with their founders, Tom and Oui. Tom and Oui are a loving gay couple that has been together for over 15 years. They met during Tom’s first trip to Bangkok. On his last night before flying home to Singapore, they crossed paths on the dance floor of a gay club and both knew it was love at first sight. However, the deck was stacked against them. On top of coming from a conservative family, Tom was only back in the region because it was his NYU summer vacation, hence adding more miles between them. In an effort to be together, Oui decided to fly to New York to study English. Upon Tom’s graduation two years later, Tom decided to settle down in Oui’s native country, Thailand. The couple has built their life in Bangkok ever since.

    During the mid-2000s when Nation Party, a gay circuit party that was held in Singapore, was discontinued indefinitely, Oui suggested that they start their own circuit party. Base on their love for the dance floor and coupled with their entrepreneurial background, they decided to take on the journey and were determined to succeed. Tom felt that if they want to do a circuit party, then they had to do it right. The party should have the best DJs with the best go-go boys and be held at the best locations. There were many gay parties at that time that were held in rundown straight clubs and these were struggling to stay alive. Being mediocre was not an option for the couple. Tom and Oui wanted to have a party that was unique to Thailand, just like how the Nation parties was unique to Singapore. Hence, they choose the Songkran festival—a well known wet and wild water festival in Thailand that welcomes the Thai New Year.Gcircuit4076

    This year, gCircuit celebrates its ninth circuit party and its success can be attributed to Tom and Oui’s passion and persistence. The couple has a lot of love for the LGBTQ community. They believe in listening to people and giving back. When they started, they only had a two night party. It subsequently expanded into three, when the demand grew. When the Bear community wanted a space where they would not feel judged, they decided to have an exclusive Bear pool party. The outreach and contribution of gCircuit goes beyond just a three day party. In 2013, gCircuit helped Standard Chartered bank roll out a suite of products called We+. This range of products allows unmarried couples, regardless of sexual orientation and gender identity, in committed relationship get loans and mortgages. This year, they are focus is on addressing the increase in number of HIV cases reported by UNAIDS. They want to help to create an innovative way to bring the awareness for the need for safe sex to the new generation. gCircuit is definitely headed towards bigger and bolder things.

    The LGBTQ calendar is shaping up to be an exciting one with SongKran9 opening the year. So come April if you are looking for a place to power up your soul, remember there is a massive circuit party with a rich history down in the City of Angels.

    Image courtesy of gCircuit
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  • The Pink Soldier

    The Pink Soldier

    A soldier defends his country with pride. He fights for the people he loves and for the land that he grew up in. Assuming that soldier wanted to be a soldier in the first place. But for Singaporeans like me, being a soldier is not a choice because of the mandatory conscription

    Don’t get me wrong, I love my country. It’s a small country with low crime rates, no natural disasters, and delicious food. Aside from the fact that I can’t get married here and I can get arrested for having gay sex, it’s a lovely place.

    I have been in the army for almost four months. Running, marching, and doing push ups in the sun while getting yelled at is something I am pretty much used to by now.

    Like most Singaporean boys, I dreaded my enlistment, two years of my life taken away while my female counterparts get a head start in their higher education and careers. However, as a GAY Singaporean boy, I had more things on my mind. Do I declare my sexual orientation to the army and let all branches of the government know I’m gay? Effectively destroying any chance of getting a job in the government sector? If I don’t declare my sexual orientation to the army, which is what most gay Singaporeans do, then I would have to go back into the closet.

    I don’t have a problem returning back to the magical world of Narnia. All I had to do was say “Bro” all the time and know the names of female porn stars.

    “Bro, check out Maria Ozawa’s tits in her new video, she gets jizz all over it.” or something like that.

    My platoon mates are nice guys (mostly). But like most straight guys, their anuses tighten up whenever another vaguely gay comes up in conversation.

    “I don’t have a problem with gay guys, as long as they don’t be gay around me.”
    “Gays are fucking disgusting.”
    “Eww, faggots.”
    “Don’t be a faggot.”
    “Did you see the way that faggot was staring at us?”

    And all that jazz, all of which I have grown used to hearing. I would love to bitch them out one day about their homophobic remarks, but there’s just too much at stake. I risk outing myself, which would make me an outcast to be picked on. I risk losing any “friendships” that I had forged. We are brothers in arms, comrades for life, unless you liked cock.

    The Singapore Armed Forces obviously isn’t the best place for homosexuals. We’re not allowed to serve openly and homosexuality is still listed as a mental disorder on health declaration forms. Any lack of masculinity made you a target for others to mock and jeer at.

    I tell myself that I am proud to serve my country even though it treats me like a second class citizen for being gay, I tell myself that the words of others don’t matter, I tell myself that these “brothers” of mine will accept me for who I am. But are they just lies I feed myself to give me the strength to push through? The next twenty months will tell.

     

    Image courtesy of Shutterstock
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  • Who says you cannot be naughty + nice?

    Who says you cannot be naughty + nice?

    Christmas has descended upon us once again! Amidst the merry making, gift-wrapping and festive cheers, there is still that important question that begs to be answered: Naughty, or nice?

    To be frank, what’s the point of segregating the naughty from the nice? Who says you cannot be naughty while, at the same time, be nice? Or vice versa? I am pretty sure that Santa has gotten on with the times and disregarded making those lists and checking them twice.

    Let’s start with the simple stuff: how to be nice. There are plenty of examples that you can execute, which automatically fall under the nice list:

    1. Surprise that special someone with a home-cooked meal! If you can’t cook, get their favourite take-outs and fashion it into a presentable meal at home. Alternatively, if you are not into that much work, just reserve a table for two in a place that you can (obviously) afford or go Dutch with.
    2. Get him or her that gift that they have always coveted. But of course, do bear in mind your budget for this season. Don’t skimp on other gifts just to get that something special. Or worse, get yourself into serious debt. Tis the season to be jolly, not to be devoid of money.
    3. If you are up for something altruistic, how about setting aside some time to do voluntary work? Find a cause that resonates strongly with you and give back to society. Spread some Christmas cheer to those less fortunate than us.

    Once you are done with the niceties, it’s finally time to put on your sexy Santa outfit – or elf, if you are into that sort of thing – get out there and get some! Depending on what flavour you like, add some spice and mint this festive season:

    1. Inject spicy moves into your bedroom activities. Greet your partner at the door with barely minimal or even nothing on. Blindfold them. Tie their hands and feet together with something silky. Introduce feathers into the foreplay. Get the temperatures rising by alternating with something hot and cold. Some biting action here and there, so long as they are in discrete spots. For the home run, do it anywhere and everywhere apart from the bed.
    2. Suggest going for a long drive across the country. Ride shotgun and give him glimpses of what he will be receiving once you have reached your secluded destination. If you’re the driver, that’s even better! Of course, be mindful of the traffic laws. As what they say in the army: you can do anything, so long as you don’t get caught.
    3. If you are feeling extremely naughty, how about a threesome? That will be the ultimate surprise. It can also be a good gift, if you can’t afford to buy anything this year. If a threesome proves to be a tad too much, get someone to be a voyeur instead – it is not too extreme, yet at the same time still injecting that naughty vibe. However, if you want something even more extreme, then go ahead and find a sex party. Now kids, remember that it is always better to be safe than sorry, so ensure that the gloves are on before the lovin’ can commence.

    Mixing up the naughty and the nice this festive season is not a difficult task to execute and achieve. With some sleigh bells jingle-ing and ring ting tingle-ing, now is the time for some (sleigh) ride with your Santa baby, who will be hurrying down that chimney tonight.

    Let’s get your Feliz Navidad on!

  • Has Emma Watson been Naughty or Nice for Christmas?

    Has Emma Watson been Naughty or Nice for Christmas?

    On September 20, Emma Watson, best known as Hermione Granger to all Harry Potter fans, delivered a powerful speech on feminism and how to make men active participants in stopping violence against women at the United Nations. While the speech is aimed to raise awareness of gender equality, it does send some useful messages that can be applied to other contexts, including the LGBT rights movement and sexual equality.

     

    According to Watson, in order to effectively stop all kinds of violence against women, men need to start becoming active participants in the process of solving gender inequality. Additionally, in the past, feminism is often considered as men-hating, and solutions to violence against women have long been victim-oriented. The advices are mostly asking women to be aware of their own dress-code, behavior, and personal safety. Rarely do we see men being mentioned as part of the solution, and this creates a very unbalanced situation where women, often the victims, are required to solve their own problems, while men, often the perpetrators, can sit by the side, waiting for the situation to improve.

     

    For LGBT rights activists, Watson’s advice sheds new light on how to engage the general public in a more effective and meaningful way. Throughout its history, LGBT rights movement has mostly been an one-way traffic, where activists championed pro-LGBT slogans to attract the general public’s attention. This strategy has been working fine until now, but if we place it next to the feminist movement, it is not hard to see the similar patterns between the two, a victim-oriented perspective. While LGBT rights movement may not seem to be straight-hating, some extreme slogans might sound a bit aggressive at making the heterosexual camp recognize us and our rights. That may explain why some hardcore anti-LGBT individuals insist on upholding their principles even until now. Instead of continuing to push them to accept sexual equality, trying to make them part of the efforts to end sexual inequality may work better. In other words, strengthening interaction and mutual understanding can clear the barriers between both camps. It no longer feels like forcing things onto an unwilling customer, rather, we will be offering them insights into our lifestyle and culture, and let them take time to compromise the difference between these new understanding and their old beliefs.

     

    That being said, there is still much work to do in terms of establishing a systematic approach to bridge the gap between both camps. Clearing sexual stereotypes should be one important step to take because it has been one of the fundamental principles that divide all of us into different groups. Sexual stereotypes enforce rigid image and definition to different groups, and members of those groups oftentimes will think and behave along the same sexual ideology. The clash between different sexual ideologies is inevitable and that often leads to the misunderstanding between each other. To get rid of sexual stereotypes is to free all groups from the rigid rules imposed on them and reconstruct the meaning of sexuality. The rigid image and definition matching with different groups should come to an end, because after all, sexuality should be fluid but not rigid. Freeing different groups from having to follow certain ideologies is to help encourage mutual understanding among different groups.

     

    Watson’s speech may be paving the way for the breakthrough of LGBT rights movement, with us inviting the rest of society to join the force to end sexual inequality and discrimination. Although the idea of heterosexual and LGBT communities coexist harmoniously in the world may seem too ideal for now, the idea of shifting the responsibility of ensuring sexual equality to the long-time foes of that idea is one groundbreaking but adoptable solution. While the process may still take decades to reach that harmonious state, it will be a good direction for the LGBT rights movement to go forward.

  • Naughty or Nice: Begging to Cum

    Naughty or Nice: Begging to Cum

    Men tied up and begging to cum. That is the catch phase of fetish porn site Men on Edge. The site caters to those that have a BDSM fetish that skews towards Edging. Edging is orgasm control. It is a sexual technique where you reach a sexual high while consciously prolonging your climax. In one of the scenes that I watched, a guy was blowing another guy that was tied up. The blow job was aggressive making the submissive hard and high quickly. Before the submissive could climax, the dominant stops the simulation to prevent the submissive from ejaculating. It does sound like torture but there are some people that enjoy it; having erotic sexual denial sessions that could last hours.

    Edging is not only a form of sexual pleasure but there are those that use the technique to help to cure premature ejaculation naturally. When performing Edging on your own, you would masturbate to learn your own point of no return. That is the point when you know you will ejaculate. Once you learn how the sensation feels like, you will have to learn to resist the urge to ejaculate both physically and mentally. This is a tall order that requires patience. Some recommend that an Edging session last between 20 to 30 minutes. And adds that you might only see improvements after a few weeks of training.

    Sexual pleasure and curing premature ejaculation are only some of the benefits of Edging. Another interesting benefit is multiple orgasm. Guys having multiple orgasm is a topic that is rarely talked about. However by practicing Edging, it is something achievable for men. When you are fully well aware of your own point of no return, you are able to stop stimulate during sexual intercourse before you cum. Hence, your body will feel the full pleasure of climax without ejaculation. This is also known as a dry orgasm. Once the wave passes, you should be able to carry on for the next round. Making sexual intercourse last as long as both you and your partner what to.

    It is important to know how long a session should last. During one of my sexual escapades, I ejaculated however the guy that I was with did not. I remember the guy told me I almost made him cum twice but he held back. It made me wonder if it would have been different if he did not hold back. I had to endure getting lock jaw, prolonged anal pains and general fatigue. It is not easy for someone in the bottom position. It also made me wonder the effects of Edging causes desensitization of the penis. I have slept with guys where they remain flaccid for long period, take a lot of stimulation to get hard and it feels like they take forever to cum. It is not the most enjoyable of all sexual encounters. However, these negative experiences are just speculation on my part that might be cause by Edging.

    At the end of the day, Edging is pleasurable and useful sexual technique. It may bring an interesting dynamic to current your sexual lifestyle. So this Christmas if you are planning to have some fun, then trying some Edging fun and leave someone begging to cum.

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  • What do most men do after sex

    What do most men do after sex

    I am one of those men who believe that –

    The sex act can be divided into three components: foreplay, intercourse, and afterplay.

    Foreplay, about which volumes have been written, is the traditional lead-in to intercourse itself. Foreplay can last from minutes to hours, is limited primarily by imagination and creativity, and includes all activities that stimulate the sexual appetite for intercourse. I truly enjoy foreplay, unlike some men who just want to get down to the business.

    Personally speaking, I love intense and insanely hot makeout session, caressing, heavy petting and oral sex. The passion of getting aroused by tantalizing kissing, touching and caressing erogenous zones, exploring each other’s bodies before penetration can be very satisfying.
    Intercourse itself is what most people consider the pleasure of sex. However, what happens after intercourse can be just as meaningful emotionally and pleasurable physically. This post coital activity is known as “afterplay”.

    This is what most men do after having sex-

    1. Roll over and fall asleep.

    2. Obsessive need to clean up after. Some men feel repulsed after orgasm and just want to clean themselves up thoroughly.

    3. Light a cigarette. I know it sounds like a cliche’ but some men enjoy a smoke after the act.

    4. Get up and leave. Their point is- “I am in for sex and not for after play or anything. Dude, we are not in a relationship or anything, Right?”

    5. Cuddle, some men like to cuddle which reinforces release of endorphins and oxytocin. It maakes you feel good.

    6. Finally there are those men- who like to clean up everything without using towel, if you know what I mean 🙂

    Unfortunately, most men don’t believe in afterplay, and frankly not much is written about afterplay.

    As far as I am concerned, I believe that afterplay is as important as foreplay. Ignorance of afterplay is common. Many people simply don’t realize that intimate ambiance can continue after orgasm.

    Some universal perspectives on how to enjoy Afterplay

    How should you afterplay? That depends on you as a couple. Many people prefer cuddling and snuggling. Hair brushing, back scratching, massaging, and caressing are also popular. Just lying together, savoring the touch, sight, smell, and taste of each other can bring intense emotional satisfaction and ready lovers for another shared intimacy.

    To quote the fourth century Sanskrit love manual, the Kama Sutra- “If lovers spend time playing and caressing each other at the end of their loving, then their ecstasy and confidence increase. Love-play enhances pleasure.”
    Afterplay should include some of the things that they enjoy and that brought them together in the first place, such as a bubble bath, sharing a glass of wine, or listening to music. Romantic, intimate conversation during afterplay can enhance the emotional aspects of sex and strengthen the bonds of the relationship, as can sharing an intimate laugh or joke.

    Afterplay do’s and don’ts

    It is important to remember that the time immediately after intercourse is a time of great vulnerability. If the intercourse is fast, furious, and unfulfilling, the partners–may feel  “post coital depression.” This feeling of emptiness and resentment can be lessened by effective afterplay, especially with reassurance, embracing, and cuddling. If there was difficulty during sex, the ensuing awkwardness or embarrassment can also be relieved by good afterplay.

    In his book Secrets of Better Sex, Dr. Joel Block provides five “do’s and don’ts ” for enjoying afterplay

    • Don’t use afterplay as a “sexual postmortem.”
    • Don’t air sexual grievances or complaints.
    • Do use this intimate time to express sexual feelings, thoughts, and desires that you’ve not previously shared.
    • Don’t discuss problems with your job, your finances, or your children.
    • Do cuddle and caress for at least five minutes.
    • Do say “I love you’.”

    Want to prolong afterplay?

    You can avoid the following: jumping up to “wash off,” turning on the television, making phone calls, criticizing your partner’s performance, or making comparisons to previous partners.

    Another important consideration regarding afterplay is the timing of sex. If you usually have sex at night, your fatigue, in combination with the parasympathetic response of orgasm will reduce your energy for afterplay. Why not consider sex at different times of the day? Early morning sex is a great way to start the day, and “afternoon delight” is just that. That extra burst of energy may just allow you more room for dessert!

    Now don’t forget to subscribe to my blog and share this article.

    Reference:
    1. http://monticelloinstitute.com/
    2. Secrets of Better Sex, Dr. Joel Block

    This article has been republished with permission from Deepak.

    Please visit Deepak’s website  to view the original post and more of Deepak’s works.

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