I think the exploration of kink and alternative lifestyles can hold a lot of transformative potential. This could go either way. It can be extremely positive if done properly and with the right people. Conversely, it could be negative if done incorrectly and with the wrong people. What I mean by this is that one should always be conscious of the potential up and downsides. For instance, I personally believe that kink, BDSM and alternative lifestyles can actually be therapeutic to some degree if executed properly. If you are submissive like I am, however, you must be aware that BDSM sex will create a very intense bond between you and your dom. There is such thing known as “sub drop” which follows sex, that could feel like a downer and is characterized by feelings of loneliness and longing for your partner. My point is that you do not want to have this kind of intense sex with someone who does not care enough about you to be there for you afterwards. It is best to pick your partners carefully and make sure you get to know them before putting yourself in such a potentially vulnerable position.
How My Interest In Bondage & Rough Sex Developed
I simply got bored with normal (vanilla) sex and starting seeking out what I wanted. I am very dominant in my every day life outside of sex, and so being submissive sexually allows me to maintain balance by experiencing a different power dynamic. Furthermore, I’ve always been curious about what it’s like being subjected to someone else’s will. I was even drawn to this as a kid, before I ever had any interest in sexuality. Whenever I would watch cartoons where the bad guy would kidnap/detain someone, I would always wonder what it would feel like to be in their position. It was only natural for me to seek out this sort of thing in a sexual context when I became an adult.
Where I Enjoy Receiving Pain!
I enjoy receiving pain on my butt, my boobs and my face mostly. I like being spanked and having my face slapped a lot. I also enjoy being choked and having my hair pulled. I do not limit myself to just that though, pain is fine anywhere so long as it starts off moderate so that I can gauge my tolerance to it. I never asked someone that I was having sex with to avoid a specific body part or anything.
Favorite Forms Of Intense Bondage Sex Play
I really enjoy (consensual) rape scenarios… Like where I’m just hanging out with someone and out of nowhere they grab me and aggressively force me to do whatever they want. Of course this is only okay if I have already given my consent to the person I’m with and discussed my limits with them. I love it especially if they tie up my limbs before fucking me, because then I feel totally helpless.
Another form of bondage sex play that I enjoy is being forced to cum while tied up or bound in whatever way. Normally this occurs if the person I’m having sex with holds a vibrator to my clit while fucking me. I like this because I can just relax and not have to try to make myself cum. I am naturally very turned on by being in this scenario, so it comes pretty easy to me (no pun intended).
I also enjoy being bound during group sex/threesomes. I like the feeling of being used and being helplessly tied up and fucked by more than 1 person gives me exactly that. I actually filmed a video a few months ago of a threesome between myself and 2 of my guy friends during which this occurred. You can watch it here: https://www.niteflirt.com/profile/Lily_Seven?gb_id=933353&un=25bc
Are Orgasms Always More Intense And Powerful?
Not necessarily. It really depends on the connection you have with the person that you’re having sex with. I’ve had intense orgasms during both vanilla and BDSM sex. I do however think that there is more potential to build up to powerful orgasms with BDSM sex as the pain can create a powerful contrast and intensify the good sensations.
Tips For Couples To Try Bondage Sex Play
If you want to do things properly, take the time to learn what you are doing. This is especially important with rope bondage, since you don’t want your partner getting too uncomfortable in the position they are tied in, or losing circulation in their limbs. The best way to learn is often in person, as you can directly speak to people who have experience with these kinds of things. There are many tutorial/workshop events advertised by geographic region on www.fetlife.com so I would highly recommend making an account there and checking out what’s going on in your region. Also, don’t be shy to ask questions and reach out to people. Most who have experience with BDSM/kink/alternative lifestyles are used to it, and in my experience they enjoy discussing it very much.
Hello, my name is Lily and I enjoy putting on webcam shows, making my own porn and putting together cool photoshoots. My fetishes include being submissive, exhibitionism, rough sex, bondage, group sex/threesomes, being spanked, being choked, having my hair pulled, being called a slut, leashes/collars, toys, anal sex, oral sex and much much more. I am also very attracted to intelligent people and particularly love dominant men who are very caring. I also enjoy being worshipped by submissive men. Aside from my sexual interests I am very passionate about music (I sing and play piano). I also enjoy writing, cooking, gardening, making my own clothes, philosophy and psychology as well.
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I am currently working on a musical project, creating a blog which will feature my writing, filming many more videos, participating in photoshoots and diverse other interesting projects, follow me on twitter for updates!
Images courtesy of Lily
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Comments
3 responses to “Bondage Sex Play – What You Should Know”
I really appreciated all the information made available in this article. As a feminist, I know many other feminist view BDSM as oppressive to women. I recently did a section on BDSM in my Women and Sexuality class. Every essay was written by someone in the BDSM community describing why it should be accepted by feminism. A few years ago I had a friend who told me that they were really into pretending to be raped while having sex with their boyfriend. As a victim of sexual assault, I did not see how anyone could be turned on by this situation. I flashbacked to my rapes and neither of them turned me on. I was confused. After reading those essays and your article, I feel I have a better understanding of the BDSM and rape role play. As you stated, the rape is consensual because it is discussed beforehand. You clearly state your limits and it is expected that they follow them. While I personally would not participate in a rape role play and given my experience, I still cannot fully understand it, I support a person’s right to participate. Rape role play is not rape and the person being “raped” actually has all the control. I respect it, I do not fully understand it, but I support a person’s right to choose. I have found that BDSM is more consensual because so much is planned and discussed first. In addition, there seems to be more trust between partners. I was allowing someone to choke me once and they did not stop when I told them to and that really ruined my sexual trust with that person. I will continue to seek out more information and ask questions because I want to be a feminist ally to the BDSM community because consensual sex is always good sex.
How much more confused & contagious can fem-Nazi-ism be(YUK).. feminists are better off single and silent… your voice,opinion & perspective is a deadly weaternized infectious plague..pls stop passing it on to naive gullible victims that appreciate masculinity unconditionally and love being a masculine man’s kinda feminen (woman).
Feminists are their own worse nightmare & oppression…(MGTOW)in a fem-Nazi-ism Social societal construct.
I live around London girls, and they look pretty good and some of them love this kind of things too.