Most people assume domination is all about violence, abuse, pain and hurting the other person, however, this could not be further from the truth if you have a real D/S experience.
Kink is for people who love to play and enjoy intense sensations – while being willing to push their own physical and mental boundaries and step outside of the socially accepted box called: the norm or ‘vanilla sex’. Kinky punters who are willing to dig deeper and open up will find ecstatic states within.
A lot of people are actually already using a light form of BDSM to supplement their regular or ‘vanilla’ sex life. Thing such as stretching, biting, spanking or anal play – which brings more sexual pleasure into their daily sex life.
Domination is a form of art: taking control, penetrating one’s mind, helping people to liberate themselves and let go off their fears, stigmas and traumas while healing and expanding their pleasure.
In my humble opinion – if practiced well – it’s like therapy. So overall I think an alternative lifestyle can help you feel more empowered, confident and happy – while you understand and accept yourself to the core.
What Is Anal Stretching?
Anal stretching is pretty much as the words describe. It can be one of the most intimate and erotic sexual acts practiced between two people. It’s a sign of complete trust in your play-partner. It’s a form of ‘giving in’ and offering yourself to the Dominant partner fully.
I love the feeling of anal-stretching. Gradually opening up the ass, first slipping in a finger or two, stimulating the other’s mind while penetrating and taking over the mind and ass simultaneously. It’s pure power.
Anal stretching is the ultimate form of submission. Allowing another person – your mistress – to do whatever she pleases with you. It’s a beautiful way to let go and surrender to the moment where you don’t need to be in control, you can just relax.
It’s a joyous feeling to enter a ‘virgin ass’. Feeling the excitement and pulsation though their anus with the fingers. So raw, so sexy so yummy.
Reasons Subs Love Anal Stretching
During my practice I find three main reasons why subs would love to be stretched anally.
1: Subs want to feel ‘filled up’. Once you have learned how to get fingered, pegged or fisted – your brain will link orgasm to anal stimulation above anything else. Craving to be filled and feel that pinching stretching hole opening, resulting in that ‘being full’ feeling.
Anal orgasms – especially if a dildo or finger is used to stimulate the prostate – can feel like a billion times stronger then any other form of orgasm.
2: Subs want to impress their Top by taking bigger and bigger toys or things up in their ass.
3: This is where the ultimate pleasure – ORGASM button lies. Once you master unlocking the anal orgasm as a man, you never want to go back to just ejaculation. Bum orgasm, can go on and on for minutes, making you orgasm as intensely as a woman.
Misconceptions About Anal Stretching
1: Men who practice anal play are gay.
No, that’s far from the truth. Most men who come and see me are married and have no desire to explore homosexuality. However they do enjoy the pleasure from this sweet form of submission; being anally stretched by a beautiful dominant woman. Giving up control and finally just be the passive one in bed.
2: You can just jump right into it.
No, you need to do proper preparation. Have your cleaning procedure and use plenty of water based lube and you can use inhalation relaxers and poppers as well to make the process as smooth as possible.
3: It’s meant to hurt or once it does hurt, it always will.
No. If it hurts, it’s because the person who did it didn’t know what they were doing. They rushed you, and you were too ‘scared’ and too much up in your mind, worrying about the cleanliness, having something up in your ass, and just generally some days we are more preoccupied and stressed than others.
4: Your anus will get all stretched out.
No. It’s the same misconception that giving vaginal child birth will make your vagina stretched out. The more you practice the easier you can relax.
5: It’s for dirty f** or sluts only.
No. If you willing to let go of the social stigma – one of the biggest misconceptions, you already win. Not only that you can experience stronger orgasms.
Best Methods To Anal Stretch
I’m a handy person. I love using my hands most. Working up the stretch from one finger to two, to three, to four all the way up to five.
The secret of being able to take more then one or two fingers is using plenty of water-based lube, ongoing communication between partner (don’t be afraid to express, if you like it slower, faster etc) and taking your time caring for that bum. If you are a beginner, start by laying down on your back (it’s the most relaxing position) put a pillow below your back and let your partner explore the bum area.
Some subs love and request tools and toys, – so I also have a wide selection of anal butt plugs, dilators, dildos and vibrators ranging from a few inches to massive Don Jon fisting ones. However it’s all about the preparation – not the gear – and how you make the other person feel.
Trust and direct communication will open bums like rose petals.
Safety Precautions To Follow During Anal Stretching
Yes, definitely. Once you have decided you would like to try anal stretching:
1: Get a good cleansing procedure – once you have decided you are ready for some naughty back door play, take a douche or enamel to clear things out.
2: Care for your dietary intake – before engaging in anal stretching, don’t eat for 3-4 hours and if you can keep a vegetarian diet for the previous day, that will support it.
3: Get less paranoid about the poop.
If you follow my tips on cleansing your bum, you are good to go. Paranoia closes the bum, so let it go. Focus on the pleasure and ask your partner to wear some latex gloves in case of an emergency.
4: Take your time.
Be patient and willing to give it a try. Anal stretching is like any other form of sexual activity. Practice makes perfect. Be willing to take one step at a time and remember every baby step is towards your ultimate goal. Get fisted by your Mistress.
Find the most comfortable position. How do you feel the most natural? Doggy or missionaries can be a good start for beginners. Once you get more advanced in anal stretching you can be a cowgirl or boy 😛 Remember, there’s no rush.
6: Red means stop (blood)
If you experience blood, it means you have gone too rough or didn’t use enough lube, so the little nerves in the bum got damaged. It’s best to stop the fun right there to avoid STD and further damage or pain.
Anal stretching is not a sprint, more like a marathon run. It takes patience, endurance and willingness to build up from a finger to a fist. However if you have ever had any sporting achievement, you know that despite the pain and discomfort, the end feels tremendously joyous and you get such a high, that you just want to do it all over again. I’m here for you to expand your anal horizon.
Featured image courtesy from Shutterstock
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