SimplySxy

Category: Sex Ed

  • How To Explore Spanking & Discipline (Part 2)

    How To Explore Spanking & Discipline (Part 2)

    We continue our Mistress Iceni feature on exploring spanking and discipline here!

    What Goes On In A Session & Favorite Props To Use

    First of all we decide pre-session if we will start on arrival or sit and have a chat first for you to settle in. Some role plays will begin at the front door, which can be thrilling – you have arrived home at your Aunt’s house to find her very annoyed about something/you are visiting your bossy new neighbour who suspects you have been peeping on her and have stolen her underwear from the washing line/you are reporting to the headmistress’ study after school for detention and so on.

    In these cases, you will be led through to the study and usually given a thorough scolding and interrogation about your behaviour. I like to start my sessions with an over the knee hand spanking to warm up the bottom. This is a good way to forge a connection across my knee before we proceed, and to reduce any resistance: once the pants come down, so does the attitude, I find. Then we would move on to a variety of positions – over the school desk, lying face down on the red leather sofa, touching your toes, strapped to the Eton Flogging Block and so on, and I would use several of my implements.

    My spanking sessions can be relentless, but I will also give you regular breaks maybe in corner time, holding a stress position, hands on your head and pants round your knees. If it is a scholastic/Governess/home tutor session I would incorporate tasks like writing lines/essays/prepare a presentation/memory tasks/tests. I absolutely love scolding so often I will scold you throughout and verbally tease you. I like some interaction and cheekiness, but some people are quiet and compliant all the way through which is also fine. 

    I like to end my session with an OTK spanking as well, to complete the circle, and depending on the visitor/scenario, will encourage the spankee to relax across my knee for a little while specially if it has been an intense session. Then I would offer a cup of tea or coffee and sit and chat for a while, making sure they do not leave until they are fully recovered!

    With regards to props, the devil is in the detail. I ask a lot of questions before the booking and mull over the scene in advance so I can get creative. For example, I had a session booking where he wanted to be spanked for stealing sweets from the corner shop when he was a lad, something he got away with at the time. So I bought some old-fashioned-looking sweets and put them on the chair in the study. When I opened the door and took him through as his Aunt, claiming I had searched his bag after a phone call from the newsagents and discovered his stolen stash, he saw the sweets, gasped and turned pale and started trembling!

    It was wonderful and a very powerful indication that just one or two appropriate props can really help with authenticity. He hadn’t expected to see that, and afterwards he said they looked just like the sweets he had stolen, and seeing them jolted him right back to being that young boy feeling the guilt of having done it. A perfect way to get into the right headspace! 

    Other props I love are my retro 70s phone with round dial and curly wiring, so I can call parents/authorities/the school.  My custom-made Eton Flogging Block is a formidable piece of furniture that’s been nick-named ‘the Beast’ and is very intimidating. I am very fetishistic about items and implements so I could tell you about many more props, but there wouldn’t be time to cover them all!

    What Should One Knew To Spanking & Discipline Prepare For Prior To Their First Session?

    Firstly, do your research regarding who you visit. If you wish to experience purely a discipline/spanking session, I’d advise visiting a disciplinarian rather than a mistress (who would probably be good at it, but also does many other things, and does not specialise in this area). A disciplinarian/spanker solely focuses on this area and will have more experience and nuance.

    Also research where they work from – do you want a domestic environment or a dungeon? Look at their online presence – things like Twitter, webpage, reviews, clips (so you can see how they work). Depending on location, people charge different rates so maybe you can find cut-price sessions that undercut some of the others, but you get what you pay for in life. 

    Approach with a polite and informative email, and communicate as much as possible before the session (not mailing 10 times a day! But it’s best to be clear before you start about details/background etc).

    Consider whether you need a safe word or not. Remember ‘I can take a hard spanking’ is very subjective. You may imagine you have a huge tolerance for pain but not be able to handle what you thought you might. Or you may be too cautious and find once you get going, you love it and could take harder. So bear in mind if you think it might get too much, you can request a safe word before the session. 

    A great spanking session is about connection. The most important thing is to feel the right connection with this person in your initial contacts. It is about trust and instinct. 

    Don’t be late! If you’re running late, inform her/him. Follow reconfirmation instructions to the letter. This shows attention the detail and a level of respect.

    Arrive clean and tidy, above all clean. We are dealing with your bottom – need I say more? Nice underwear is also much appreciated. Often you may bring a gift if you like but it’s not compulsory. If you do choose to turn up with flowers/chocolates/a bottle of wine etc you will probably be remembered as very thoughtful and considerate. 

    Be prepared if it’s your first time – the effect of discipline may not be what you expect. Some people can experience strong emotions during a spanking as it can bring up unexpected repressed emotions. It might make you feel rampantly horny!

    Equally, it may send you into sub-space where you feel floaty, serene and peaceful. You can become quite discombobulated – forget your wallet or pick up the wrong pair of glasses, or try to leave via the boiler cupboard (all of these have happened after my sessions!) so make sure you have gathered yourself and your faculties before leaving. 

    Mostly know this – it might be an intense experience, and some of it may be painful, but if you have been thinking about getting a thrashing for some time, and are not sure whether to try it, I’d say if it’s often on your mind then it is for you, and it will be a liberating experience and the start of a whole new chapter to your life.

    You are never too old to go across my knee either – I have one lovely visitor who is 85 and took his first spanking at 75. It’s never too late to start this journey. But be warned – once you pop, you can’t stop! 

    Mistress Iceni – London-based disciplinarian specialising in spanking and role plays with a distinctly vintage style. I may remind you of your old school-teacher, Mum’s friend, strict neighbour or Governess, but whichever female authority figure I represent for you, a visit to my study will usually result in a sore bottom and a marked improvement in your behaviour. I am a firm believer in old-fashioned discipline and you will find it may hurt at the time, but it is ultimately for your own good. 

    Follow Mistress Iceni on

    Website: www.missiceni.com

    Twitter: @Mistress_Iceni

    Clips4Sale Clips store ‘At Home with Miss Iceni: https://www.clips4sale.com/studio/138363/at-home-with-miss-iceni

    Upcoming projects to promote:

    I am currently working on several projects to collaborate more with women as I have enjoyed filming so much with Anty (@Anty851 on Twitter, follow her, she’s wonderful) and Ana, and before that, the wonderful films for Miss Elsa Svenson (wellsmackedseat.com) as Miss Ashbrook. I am planning to film some clips and content with a lovely young lady Dilan (@OhdearDilan on Twitter- you really should follow her too) Also I have Emily Jane now available to join me in sessions and film with me as a spankee. I’m currently in discussions with another lovely young lady to offer exclusive custom clips as mother and daughter. So watch this space and follow me on social media if you want to see me spanking some pretty bottoms!

    My other project which I worked on extensively during lockdown is my retro spanking novel: Set in 1979 in provincial England, it’s the story of Andrew, a permanently horny 17 year old who is sent to live with his strict Aunt while his parents divorce. She takes him on a roller-coaster journey of discovery with help from her equally assertive lady friends. It is a coming-of-age story that examines self-acceptance, kink-shaming, gender identity, spanking, age play, petticoat punishment and the psychological and emotional pull of corporal punishment. I have pitched it somewhere between ‘Harriet Marwood, Governess’ (which was a huge inspiration, and this is a kind of updated homage) and the saucy ‘Carry On’ Films of the 1970s. The working title is ‘Aunty knows best’ and I have just finished the first draft, so while it is not available just yet, I will promote it as soon as I have it ready for my eager readers! The plan is to publish as a paperback, e-book and possible audio version, narrated by myself.

    Images courtesy of Mistress Iceni

    Like to be featured on SimplySxy? Drop us an email at editorial@SimplySxy.com!

  • How To Explore Spanking & Discipline (Part 1)

    How To Explore Spanking & Discipline (Part 1)

    To me it is perfectly normal to be kinky. One of my greatest joys in this work is to encourage and allow people to deal with their deep-seated shame around their kinks, and to allow them to express themselves fully with someone who makes them feel safe and accepted.

    I believe kinks to be a very healthy expression of our shadow selves – the darker, quirkier recesses of our souls. If you deny something, it is like pushing a beach-ball under the surface of the water. It will pop up again somewhere else, you can’t keep it under. As long as it is safe, sane and consensual I do not judge anybody.

    Exploring a kink with someone on the same wavelength has something innocent about it. Together you can regress to that space you naturally inhabited when playing with your friends as a child: lost in your boundless imagination, totally immersed in the fantasy world you have created, going on a magical mystery tour. I find people who are kinky to be the most grounded, self-accepting, and self-aware people.

    What Does Discipline Constitute?

    Most people think ‘discipline’ means punishment, and it often is, but its original meaning is ‘to learn or teach’ from the Latin ‘disciplina’ (as in ‘disciple’). I love it because it is ultimately good for people and it has so many facets: role-play, endorphin-release, trust, power exchange, regression and so on. You might think it would get boring or repetitive, but for me it never does. I find it endlessly fascinating.

    Is Spanking Part Of Discipline or A Totally Independent Kink?

    I’ve never been asked that before! I think they are linked because you usually spank someone in the context of a disciplinary scenario. I can give you an example of how they are independent: I can carry out, for example, a long discipline session which involves very little actual impact play – say an intricate school scene with lots of role play and activities like corner time, writing lines, stress positions, scolding and so on, and only deliver 12 cane strokes near the end.

    Sometimes people ask for this type of more cerebral and psychological session. But I would rarely spank someone outside the context of them being disciplined in some way. Sometimes I spank my ‘nephew’ Andrew purely for the fun of it and because his pert little bottom is irresistible but usually it involves a play-acting theme where he has done something wrong or ‘needs’ it. 

    Reasons Subs Are Into Spanking & Discipline

    First of all, I don’t really like the generic label ‘sub’. I think mostly for real spankophiles, it’s understood that many people are not even natural submissives. I prefer to call them ‘bottoms’, ‘spankees’, ‘nephews’ ‘naughty girls’ etc.

    I hear many reasons: being spanked as a child or witnessing spankings at school or in a domestic environment, therefore being ‘hot-wired’ to like it. The release of endorphins afterwards and the floating sense of calm. Being embarrassed or humiliated, or being objectified sexually by having to strip in front of me and/or my lady friends (from men, not women). A need to regress to a younger age/return to a child-like state. Being put in their place to balance ego in a dominant, high-status line of work. Giving someone else power over them and being able to let someone else make decisions for them.

    The complete focus it takes to experience the physical sensations of impact play – it brings you into the present moment and away from the stress outside in the rest of your life because you cannot have your mind filled with anything else during the experience. It turns them on: for some people, it’s just their kink. The comfort of being across someone’s lap and being held in an OTK position. I’d say it’s 50/50 with people who are into spanking because they were spanked as a child, and those who weren’t. 

    Mistress Iceni – London-based disciplinarian specialising in spanking and role plays with a distinctly vintage style. I may remind you of your old school-teacher, Mum’s friend, strict neighbour or Governess, but whichever female authority figure I represent for you, a visit to my study will usually result in a sore bottom and a marked improvement in your behaviour. I am a firm believer in old-fashioned discipline and you will find it may hurt at the time, but it is ultimately for your own good. 

    Follow Mistress Iceni on

    Website: www.missiceni.com

    Twitter: @Mistress_Iceni

    Clips4Sale Clips store ‘At Home with Miss Iceni: https://www.clips4sale.com/studio/138363/at-home-with-miss-iceni

    Upcoming projects to promote:

    I am currently working on several projects to collaborate more with women as I have enjoyed filming so much with Anty (@Anty851 on Twitter, follow her, she’s wonderful) and Ana, and before that, the wonderful films for Miss Elsa Svenson (wellsmackedseat.com) as Miss Ashbrook. I am planning to film some clips and content with a lovely young lady Dilan (@OhdearDilan on Twitter- you really should follow her too) Also I have Emily Jane now available to join me in sessions and film with me as a spankee. I’m currently in discussions with another lovely young lady to offer exclusive custom clips as mother and daughter. So watch this space and follow me on social media if you want to see me spanking some pretty bottoms!

    My other project which I worked on extensively during lockdown is my retro spanking novel: Set in 1979 in provincial England, it’s the story of Andrew, a permanently horny 17 year old who is sent to live with his strict Aunt while his parents divorce. She takes him on a roller-coaster journey of discovery with help from her equally assertive lady friends. It is a coming-of-age story that examines self-acceptance, kink-shaming, gender identity, spanking, age play, petticoat punishment and the psychological and emotional pull of corporal punishment. I have pitched it somewhere between ‘Harriet Marwood, Governess’ (which was a huge inspiration, and this is a kind of updated homage) and the saucy ‘Carry On’ Films of the 1970s. The working title is ‘Aunty knows best’ and I have just finished the first draft, so while it is not available just yet, I will promote it as soon as I have it ready for my eager readers! The plan is to publish as a paperback, e-book and possible audio version, narrated by myself.

    Images courtesy of Mistress Iceni

    Like to be featured on SimplySxy? Drop us an email at editorial@SimplySxy.com!

  • What Should You Do If a Vibrator Gets Stuck Inside You?

    What Should You Do If a Vibrator Gets Stuck Inside You?

    The modern world of sex toys is one that spans far and wide, as there are currently an endless number of little devices aimed to help you enhance your sex life in both self and partner play. With this vast collection comes a variety of different characteristics in your toy, as each maintains a unique size, shape, and curvature.

    And the unique nature of all of these toys, especially a vibrator for women that can range so greatly in size, arises the truth that yes;

    Sometimes sex toys do get stuck inside you!

    And if you have found yourself in the position of frantically wondering what you should do if a vibrator gets stuck inside you, then before getting into the more detailed advice, please-

    Start First With Breathing!

    Although there are quite a few necessary differences in the steps you should take if a sex toy gets stuck inside your vagina versus your anus, start first with taking a few deep breaths! No matter what, breathing will help you to lower your heart rate, and relaxing your tense body is one of the most essential steps in helping to remove a vibrator as it will assist in not making your current situation worse!

    Seriously, just know that everything is going to be entirely okay and this is a normal occurrence, so never feel embarrassed or afraid to seek help, whether that be from your partner or a healthcare provider, and breathe slowly to approach the situation with a strategically calm mind.

    What To Do If A Vibrator Gets Stuck Inside Your Vagina vs. Stuck In Your Anus

    I am going to be blunt here because it is the best advice for you… If a sex toy is stuck in your butt, then unfortunately you are going to need medical care, so keep breathing slowly and seek immediate attention. You see, a sex toy getting stuck in the vagina is usually a totally different experience, as the cervix of your vagina will act as a literal wall to prevent that little hand-held bullet vibrator for women from entering the womb.

    Pretty handy of evolution to hand us that one, right?

    Yet the anal cavity just isn’t quite there on preventative measures. If a sex toy gets stuck in your anus, then there is a chance that it will continue to move further up and eventually into the digestive tract which will require surgery (Hint: This is why it is important to use body region-specific sex toys like the high-quality butt plugs from “V for Vibes”) to remove it safely.

    Your best bet is to not try and reach your fingers inside to grab it out as this will even further push the toy in, and instead head to the doctor. Like I said, your doctor has seen this before and it is nothing to be afraid of, so take the lesson learned and get yourself all fixed up!

    If you have a vibrator stuck in your vagina, however, then although you can always seek medical attention as the best and safest means to get it out, there are also plenty of effective techniques you can implement to get your favorite little woman’s vibrator out of you!

    What To Do If A Vibrator Gets Stuck Inside Your Vagina

    Lay Down and Breathe

    Remember that breathing is the most important thing in this situation! Lay yourself down flat and continue to relax your entire body by closing your eyes and breathing slowly. It will indeed feel difficult to enter a meditative state when you know that something is stuck inside you, but you have to do your best to try!

    This is because the key to getting anything out of your vagina begins with pure relaxation of the muscles, as your vagina is quite strong, and any extra tenseness will further tighten that grip on the toy. By laying down, you will help your entire pelvic floor to relax. To further do this try bringing your feet together.

    This position feels great during sex as it enhances stimulation as a result of calm muscles, but it is also a great position to try and get a stuck toy out of your vagina for the same reasons. When you are calm, breathing, and laying down with your heels together, slowly reach your fingers inside and see if you can’t find a grip on the stuck vibrator.

    Chances are you will be able to feel it, and once you have, keep breathing while you pull it out. Just be careful to not take this too fast, as you don’t want to injure yourself further, and wallah!

    Use Gravity To Your Advantage!

    Gravity is one heck of a force, so try utilizing a squatting position to enhance the natural ‘downward and out’ direction of the vibrator with gravity. Get out of bed, keep those deep breathes a-comin’, and place your feet about shoulder-width apart to enter the squatting position.

    Lower your core until your butt is hanging down around your knees. Once you are squatting, begin increasing the strength of your breaths to push the toy out of your body. Not quite as crazy as giving birth, but be strong with your force while ironically remaining as calm as possible.

    If the gravity and pushing together do not bring the sex toy completely out, then use your fingers as well while still in the squatting position to try and grab it. The position of your body should allow you to easily feel inside yourself and snag that sneaky little vibrator for women right out!

    Lube Is Your Friend

    No matter what method you choose in finding an answer as to what to do if a vibrator gets stuck inside you, regardless of such;

    There is no such thing as too much lube!

    Lube is your friend, and it is an extremely important asset in removing a stuck sex toy. Not only will lube help to prevent any stretching or tearing of the vaginal wall, but it will also help give you the lubrication required to comfortably stick your fingers inside and up to the cervix.

    Just remember, vaginas are technically made to stretch, but you never want to force anything that is beyond your comfort zones. If you simply cannot bring yourself to what it takes to reach your hand inside to pull it out, then seek medical attention to do so for you. But if you can, then use a ton and a ton of lube to make the sex toy removal as smooth as possible.

    When You Can, Ask for Help!

    Unless you have accidentally had too much fun using your vibrator for women by yourself and inevitably lost it inside, then chances are there will be a partner with you who can help you out in this situation. First of all, as soon as you realize a vibrator is stuck inside you, you need to stop any further sexual activity.

    Tell them what has happened so that nothing is done that will push the toy deeper inside. And then, approach the situation together!

    An extra pair of hands will do you a lot of good here, as they will have a lot better of an angle in finding and grabbing the toy with their fingers. Just as well, it can help you to further lay back and straighten out your body by preventing the awkward lean that occurs from reaching your hand down towards your vagina. If it helps, use your hands to spread your vagina apart so that your partner can easily navigate and see to remain as delicate as possible in this process.

    Take A Moment To Look Around You

    I know this might seem silly, but if you really cannot get the sex toy out of your vagina, then you must question one time if it even got stuck! Look diligently around the area and under every one of your sheets. Sex toys are slippery and they can be small, so maybe you did not lose it inside yourself but instead lost it somewhere else!

    Double-check and take but a few moments to look around you before moving on to the next step in getting it out.

    Always Seek Medical Advice

    Please please, your body is your body, and to look out for your health in the best manner possible, the safest and most efficient method in removing a sex toy or vibrator from your vagina is to simply seek medical care in doing so.

    Your doctor will ensure that everything has been done properly and that nothing else has slipped inside(like a battery), so if it feels right simply do not wait any longer and get yourself professionally checked out for the absolute best results!

    Photo by Shutterstock

    Like to be featured on SimplySxy? Drop us an email at editorial@SimplySxy.com!

  • What It’s Like To Pro Domme In A Dungeon

    What It’s Like To Pro Domme In A Dungeon

    Kink and an alternative lifestyle should be normalized just a little bit more because more people than you realize actually live life that way or have some interest in kink, but since it is so outcasted by society, people don’t accept it.

    It would be nice if people were able to just express themselves and be into what they are into and not have to fear judgement. The kink society is a very welcoming community and a really good support system for people who need a way to express themselves differently than what society considers the norm.

    What Is Inside A Dungeon?

    Generally, a dungeon has some equipment that you can tie a person down to, usually a St. Andrews Cross, a bed of some sort, or a cage. All dungeons are different, but typically hitting implements (whips, paddles, floggers).

    I bring my own equipment for electrical play, strap ons, and sounding kits that I am comfortable using and have a lot of experience working with. I keep my things separate and every girl usually brings their own equipment well. They are so many different things you use in the genre of Femdom and kink, it’s never going to be a limited list. I am constantly being brought new presents and toys that are fun to use.

    The list can really go on forever, but some of the more popular ones are ropes for bondage, cuffs, blindfolds, clothespins, and sensory deprivation tools.

    What Is Your Dungeon Of Choice?

    I choose Mystique Chamber because it is the closest and most convenient for me to go to, and it is the only dungeon in the San Fernando Valley area. I was happy to find that all the other Domme’s are very similar to me, and we have all ended up bonding, connecting, and becoming very good friends.

    There is not a caddy element there, and since I have been there for so long I let myself in and out, it’s comfortable, it feels like home, and I really enjoy it there. Femdom is a very broad topic so all my sessions vary, but some of my most popular sessions involve foot worship, bondage, financial domination, ball busting, corporal punishment, and strap on/sissy play.

    Misconceptions Of Dungeons

    People usually hear the word “dungeon” and they get all freaked out that it’s a “Big Scary Place.” This is not the case, it’s a safe and fun place to play where people can express themselves and their kinks.

    Most people can share their darkest secrets without worry that they normally can’t share with anyone else and truly feel free. It can be quite cathartic and therapeutic for most people who visit.

    Rules & Boundaries In A Dungeon

    Every Domme has their own set of rules and set of boundaries that they instill with their clients, as each Domme is independent and does not work for the dungeon.

    In general, we keep the dungeon safe and sanitized. We like to keep the privacy and safety of the dungeon, we do not provide the address of the dungeon until immediately before the session to any new clients until they have paid a deposit and have valid references.

    We try our best to keep the dungeon a safe, consensual, hygienic, and private location for the benefit of everyone who visits.

    How Can A Sub Prepare For Their First Dungeon Experience?

    A sub should do their research, and research the Domme they want to have a session with beforehand to see if their styles will mesh well with one another. Send a respectful e-mail with a list of interests and boundaries so they can collaborate with the Domme for the best possible experience.

    A list of general interests is best, as all the Dommes are all professionals and can provide a very natural flowing session from the sub’s interests expressed to them. All of the Domme’s are very talented and inspired, so a sub should keep in mind to let the Domme do what they do best and follow her lead at all times. Give the Domme free reign, but still set their own personal limits and boundaries.

    Clear communication from the beginning of the session and during is the most important aspect for an enjoyable session. The more respectful a sub is, the better their chance is to book a session. Tipping is in everyone’s best interests.

    Sorceress Bebe – LA based pro Domme, findomme and fetish clip artist. I am fierce when it comes to psychological domination and once you fall under my spell, there’s no going back. You’ll be hooked, spellbound and begging for more. The way I get into your head becomes an addiction from which you will never recover, but why would you want to?

    Follow Sorceress Bebe on

    Website: https://www.sorceressbebe.com/

    Twitter: https://twitter.com/b_findom

    Mystique Chamber Page: http://mystiquechamber.com/sorceress-bebe/

    Clip Sites:

    o   iWantSorceressBebe.com

    o   https://www.clips4sale.com/studio/144411/sorceress-bebe

    o   https://www.manyvids.com/Profile/1003755650/SorceressBebe/Store/Videos/

    Fan Sites:

    o   https://onlyfans.com/b_findom

    o   https://stars.avn.com/sorceressbebe

    Call Me Sites:

    o   https://www.sextpanther.com/Sorceress-bebe

    o   https://www.niteflirt.com/SorceressBebe

    Amazon Wishlist:

    o   https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/9H7DZ0DS8DAQ?ref_=wl_share

    Article images courtesy of Sorceress Bebe

    Like to be featured on SimplySxy? Drop us an email at editorial@SimplySxy.com!

  • How To Explore Kinky Phone Sex With Goddess Reba

    How To Explore Kinky Phone Sex With Goddess Reba

    Well, since I have been involved in the BDSM lifestyle for a little over 20 yrs, I guess you could say that I am very much in favor of kink and BDSM. There is so much more to BDSM than the stereotypical whips, chains and women in tight leather corsets. For many people, BDSM is a way to de-stress from a high pressure job.

    For others, BDSM can be a way for them to discover (or get in touch with) their true self that they may be afraid to show to the rest of the world. And for some, BDSM can be a way of safely dealing with past traumas.

    In a nutshell, I see BDSM as a beautiful, complex and diverse window into human sexuality and the human condition.

    What I Love About Kinky Phone Sex

    This might sound a bit odd, but I genuinely love getting to know the clients and building a deeper connection with them. I have always loved talking to people from all over the world, even before I dipped my toe into the phone sex industry.

    Kinky phone sex provides, for me, a fun way to talk to fascinating people in a more in-depth and personal way than I could ever hope for in conventional chat rooms or out in public. I absolutely love my job and can’t see me ever stopping.

    Reasons One Engages In Kinky Phone Sex

    There are several reasons why someone would like to engage in kinky phone sex. Each person is different, so I can only speak in generalities, but I would say that the primary reason would be safety.

    Calling a kinky phone service, like the company I work for (www.peplove.com) is a discreet way to safely explore sexual fantasies without any pressure or having to worry about disease or social stigma. Clients come to me because they are looking to connect with someone that won’t judge/shame them for their fantasies. 

    Do You Have A Particular Dom Style?

    I’m not sure I have a particular ‘style’. What I can tell you, is that I am brutally honest, no-nonsense and down to earth. While I have a fondness for some of the more sadistic practices, I realize that not everyone is interested in that; so I adjust accordingly and bring out my softer, more sensual side.

    I have many interests, both in BDSM and in the outside/vanilla world, which I use to help build a connection with the client. Want to talk about wax play? Bring it. Want to talk about servicing an entire hockey team? I’ve got you covered. Want to talk about hiking the Appalachian trail? I’m there with my hiking boots on. Let’s go. 

    What Goes On In A Kinky Phone Sex Session

    This is a difficult question to answer. Each call is different and unique to the client. One thing that all calls have in common, is that I ask the caller what is on their mind.

    For some long established clients, they just jump right in and tell me that they have been naughty and need to be punished. Then we discuss what happened and the sort of punishment they deserve. For new clients, I start with asking a variety of questions in order to learn their interests and their limits. Within the fantasy realm that I weave, there are no off limit topics. 

    What Should One New Prepare For?

    If you are new to kinky phone sex, I want you to be as open and honest as possible. Let me know, right away what your likes and dislikes are, if there are any words or scenarios that are a complete turn-on or turn-off.

    I can’t read your mind, so it’s important that you, the client, tell me these things. Also, please remember that I am a real person and that being respectful and polite will take you far. 

    In regards to expectations, you should expect to be heard and to explore your fantasies in a safe, entertaining manner. 

    Born & raised in the U.S. Midwest, Goddess Reba is a phone sex operator with www.peplove.com and writer of erotica and kink positive educational articles.  As a BDSM lifestyle Dominatrix, Goddess Reba has seen it all and loves getting into a submissive’s mind to see what makes them tick. Goddess Reba brings a wicked sense of humor and a wildly creative imagination to everything She does. Her rave reviews speak for themselves.

    People can see and learn more about Goddess Reba using the following links:

    https://twitter.com/GoddessRebaXxx

    www.peplove.com/ladies/goddess-reba

    https://stars.avn.com/goddessreba

    https://fetlife.com/users/6548441

    https://peplove.com/rebas-rave-reviews

    https://yourkinkyfriends.com/2018/05/19/phonesex2/

    https://www.kinkacademy.com/2018/10/outskirts-of-kinky-town/

    Article images courtesy of Goddess Reba

    Like to be featured on SimplySxy? Drop us an email at editorial@SimplySxy.com!

  • How Do I Explore My Interest In Interracial Sex?

    How Do I Explore My Interest In Interracial Sex?

    It’s really hard to get out and meet new people right now with the pandemic still going on. Social media is a great way to start. Simply expanding your Instagram and following pages that are focused on Black men, mixed couples, interracial dating, etc can really help.

    Then, of course meet a Black man (or if you’re a Black man, meet a white woman). Then let the exploration begin! It’s a wonderful journey!

    How Has Interracial Sex Changed One’s Sex Life?

    For me, sex requires a lot of passion and connection. When I dated white boys, I personally wasn’t finding that. I could easily say that Black men are better at sex, because for me they are. But, that’s because I’m very attracted to Black men and the style of sex they offer. When you find someone that really excites you, the sex is going to be different and better.

    In addition, Black men have a certain sexual characteristic. Typically, Black men are more passionate and uninhibited. And typically, they do have larger penises. Those elements can really step up your sex life and change it forever. That’s why we say that once you go Black, you don’t go back!

    Is The Topic Of Interracial Sex Taboo?

    Unfortunately, interracial sex is still taboo. Not as much as it used to be though. It’s still taboo because of racism, particularly from the side of white males. Having sex with a Black man certainly isn’t racist. Being sexually attracted to Black men is no more racist than preferring a certain hair color or body type.

    Interracial sex is taking off and interracial relationships are growing faster than conventional ones. The people that think interracial is racist are a very small minority and they’re shrinking more everyday. 

    Misconceptions About Interracial Sex & Dating

    There is a lot of anger and jealousy that comes primarily from white males. The misconceptions that they share such as Black men will get us pregnant and leave, Black men are rapists, and Black men will abuse us. They’re all misconceptions that are part of an attack rooted in jealousy and racism. It’s easy to fall for them, but they’re not true. 

    Ways To Explore Interracial Sex

    If interracial sex is something that you’re thinking about, have fun doing the research! Visit some of the interracial porn sites such as Blacked.com Darkx.com and Blackedraw.com among many more. Let your inhibitions down and have fun!

    Follow interracial pages on Instagram or Twitter and meet like-minded people. From there, indulge in the sex. If you’re new to it, go in with an open mind and leave your hang ups at the door. 

    How To Prepare For An Interracial Sexual Experience

    When I first expressed an interest in meeting and having sex with a Black man to my best friend, she gave me a gigantic black dildo and said “you better practice first”. It was obviously a joke, but it also woke me up to reality: Black men do sex different and it feels different. Not every Black man is enormous, but most of them are on the bigger side. Getting used to the size difference if you’ve only dated white boys before can be challenging.

    So, practicing with a larger toy isn’t a bad idea. Black men typically have more stamina as well and that can take a toll on your body if you’re not prepared. Don’t be afraid to tell him to take it slow. If the passion becomes too much, he’ll understand if you have to take a breather. It’s common for a Black man to take sex seriously.

    For most Black men, sex is a connection and it should mean something. A Black man will work hard to please us and it rarely seems to fail. So, get psychologically ready as well!

    Andrea Dillinger – 26 year old Scorpio. Interracial for over four years and counting! 

    Follow Andrea on

    Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/annie_the_dredre/

    All links to websites and social media find me on Instagram @annie_the_dredre and I’ll be happy to answer your interracial questions!

    Images courtesy of Andrea Dillinger

    Like to be featured on SimplySxy? Drop us an email at editorial@SimplySxy.com!

  • The Secret Life Of A Hotwife (Chapter 11) – Varieties Of Play

    The Secret Life Of A Hotwife (Chapter 11) – Varieties Of Play

    Ever wondered what really happens on a hot girls’ night out? Meet Juliet Adelaide and her friends in The Secret Life of a Hotwife as they drive into the sassy world in this no-holds barred account of a hotwife’s lifestyle, and uncover all you’ve ever wanted to know, from the sensual and provocative to the risque and unspeakable.

    Based on the steamy real-life experience of Juliet Adelaide, author of The Mrs Sexy Chronicles, this exclusive first-hand account of her exploration of sexual freedom and insight into the life of a hotwife will leave you begging for more.

    Chapter 11 Teaser – Varieties Of Play

    The other ladies were surprised that there is another hotwife in the bar. Louisa said she doesn’t get to talk about it often but she would be happy to answer any questions we had about her hotwife lifestyle. She turned to me and asked if my husband is a cuckold. Michelle asks what that meant and Louisa replied with a smile that it’s another game that can be played by those actively taking part in a hotwife lifestyle and while she is permitted to have lovers but Nate is not. I then chipped in (to Michelle’s benefit) that a woman plays a more dominant role when her husband is a cuckold.

    With a laugh, Louisa told us how her husband wanted sex so much that she thought it would be fun to make him wait for extended periods of time, with her teasing him. Louisa added that while her husband had no qualms about her taking on lovers, she really wanted to be dominant as Nate had almost always been the sub in their relationship anyway. And they both liked it that way. Louisa leaned forward and whispered that she even went to the extent of bringing home a cock cage from a local adult store one day.

    Julie nearly spits out her Margarita and laughs. She had seen cock cages before but had not known anyone that had used one.  With a twinkle in her eye Louisa told us about the available on the market these day. They come in a variety of metal, plastic or silicon.  Some of them have small gaps so you can touch different areas of the penis, while others allow no access at all. They have to be put on a non-erect penis, but otherwise they just kind of fit snugly around the whole cock. The purpose of these cages is the same: they make it impossible for a man to get an erection.

    Purchase and read the rest of this amazing book by clicking here: The Secret Life Of A Hotwife 

    Juliet Adelaide has a Bachelor’s degree in Humanities and Culture from Arizona State University. She started dating her husband at the age of 17 and they were monogamous for 25 years. They are a devoted couple who only recently opened their marriage to new sexual experiences allowing Juliet to become a hotwife.

    “mrs Sexy” is the witty, erotic and true story of her experiences with this new polyamorous lifestyle. Juliet, (aka Mrs Sexy), takes you through the most personal moments of her romantic and sexual adventures.

    Follow Juliet on

    Website: https://mrssexybook.com/

    Twitter: https://twitter.com/mrssexybook

    Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/Mrs-Sexy-469306166570252/

    Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mrssexybook2

    YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UC_p2kOC111O_3CEtat-7lCg

    Images courtesy of Juliet Adelaide

    Like to be featured on SimplySxy? Drop us an email at editorial@SimplySxy.com!

  • How To Get Started Into Swinging For Couples

    How To Get Started Into Swinging For Couples

    In the last 20 years, alternative lifestyles and relationships other than  traditional ‘monogamous heterosexual’ marriage has gained acceptance and popularity. Adult porn stars, such as Jemma Jameson, have become household names. Movies such as Eyes Wide Shut was a box office hit, and the 50 Shades of Grey series started an entire movement, where people felt free to openly discuss subjects once thought of as taboo. The internet has a never ending supply of access to free porn, and the content has shifted from big budget productions, with actresses that 90% of the population cannot relate to, and replaced with amateur and reality porn. 

    Sex is no longer such a taboo topic,  and people are now comfortable enough to share their desires without the fear of being judged. We have so many different types of relationship dynamics today, and it would be foolish to think that traditional, monogamous relationships are ideal for everyone.  For some, exploring the options outside what is considered the ‘norm’ can teach you things you never knew about yourself or your partner by opening up the channel for communication,  challenging perceived sexual and personal boundaries, and strengthening the relationship with oneself and your partner. 

    How My Interest In Swinging Began

    Several years ago, I shot about a dozen adult films in LA and Miami. I became good friends with one of the male actors, who happened to live in Dallas, and we quickly became close friends. He was a bartender at several venues, and one was the upscale swingers club in Dallas. I was asked to promote/host one of their events. 

    I was brand new to the industry, and I was met by a packed club of  half naked people, waiting in line for my autograph. I became fast friends with the owner and his wife and several other couples, but there was one couple in particular, that developed into a deep, loving relationship. I was their girlfriend for almost 2 years, and we shared a very special friendship. I am still good friends with them, the club owner, and several of the same couples I Initially met 10+ years ago. 

    Reasons For Couples Who Explore Swinging

    Well, there are the right reasons, and the wrong ones LOL, and I have experienced couples in both situations. 

    The lifestyle is not a bandaid for a failing relationship. If your relationship does not already have a strong foundation of trust, mutual respect, and open, honest communication, you are setting yourself up for failure. Both parties must be willing participants and should never be forced or guilt tripped into this scenario. Ground rules and boundaries MUST be discussed, agreed upon, and upheld, and the line of communication should always maintain open.

    If you are scared or uncomfortable openly communicating with your partner or others your needs, desires, and boundaries, a counseling session with an intimate coach would be a better course of action for self improvement and strengthening your relationship. 

    How Does One Bring Up The Idea Of Swinging To Their Partner?

    Again, honest and open communication is key. One way to bring up the subject to gauge interest is to watch an adult film together, involving a scenario with more than two participants.  Comment to your partner how much the scene turns you on and why…..ask if this is something they would ever be open to trying together to gauge interest. 

    If you need to convince your partner to engage in adding an additional person/persons to your bedroom, then you should not pursue this lifestyle. Both you and your partner must be willing participants.

    3 Tips For New Couples To Try Swinging

    1. Open, honest communication: I’ll say this again, because I can not stress enough that this is KEY to a positive experience 

    2. Set clear rules and boundaries: Have a discussion of your ground rules for what each of you is comfortable with, and what is off limits

    3. Take your time: Many couples new to the lifestyle make the mistake of attending a lifestyle event with the mentality they need to hook up. They create unnecessary pressure on one another,  as well as creating an aggressive vibe that most will find off putting. Relax, really take the time to talk to people and get to know them before thinking about taking your clothes off. There are several lifestyle websites where you can create a profile, and get an opportunity to chat online. For first timers, I highly suggest hiring a professional such as myself, with years of experience meeting with nervous couples.

    Hayden Hightower – A petite blonde playmate based in Dallas TX.  Hayden is a TER Dallas TOP 10 provider available for luxury Companionship and VIP Concierge services for men, women, and couples. She is highly regarded for her Couple’s encounters and her authentic NURU Bodyslide encounters, in addition to her one on one girlfriend experiences. Hayden is an avid fitness enthusiast and works in the health/wellness industry helping others achieve a healthier lifestyle.  In her free time, she enjoys working out, relaxing at home, and spending time with her boxer, Tank. 

    Follow Hayden Hightower on

    Website: http://hayden-hightower.wixsite.com/texas

    Twitter: @hayden_dfw

    Article images courtesy of Hayden Hightower

    Like to be featured on SimplySxy? Drop us an email at editorial@SimplySxy.com!

  • Why I Love Camming

    Why I Love Camming

    I grew up believing sex was meant to be between two people who are in love. The older I’ve become, the more I have realized its value as an essential part of my life. It has helped me learn about myself in more ways than I can explain and has proven to be a place of comfort for me.

    How The Idea Of Camming First Come To Me

    I first started camming because a friend from graduate school introduced me to it. She had done so previously but didn’t do the same kind of camming that I was interested in. I had help from her to start my own Chaturbate and went on to find out how I wanted to cam through trial and error.

    What Did You Have To Prepare To Get Started?

    A lot of it was watching other peoples’ streams and seeing what their tip menus were like but also talking to friends and seeing what I felt comfortable with. No matter what, you have to keep in mind that you are in charge here and that you can do as you please no matter what anyone else says.

    The equipment aspect involved me buying a new laptop, new tower computer, lots of lighting (ring lights and string lights), HD camera, microphone, Bluetooth keyboard and mouse, along with any other decorations to make yourself feel the most comfortable and sensual.

    I had been lucky and achieved most of these through earning money from camming or through my clients paying for them so they could see me better.

    Personal preparation is just taking care of myself. I like to cam often so people normally find me eating at the beginning of my stream and drinking something with caffeine to get me started. I like to be clean, showered, shaved and trimmed before I cam and pick out whatever outfit I am in the mood for that day. This changes from lingerie to cosplay to little girl outfits.

    Why I Enjoy Camming

    I enjoy the freedom of camming, of being able to find what I like without too harsh of consequences. Camming has become a safe space for me to be a tease and to realize my desires sexually and mentally.

    What Is Your Specialty?

    My specialty is teasing, soft BDSM, and girl on girl. I had learned that I had too much stage freight to cum on camera so I stuck to teasing my audience with dildo blow jobs, my body and my need to flirt. I have a friend of mine that also cams and we will sometimes cam together to change up the pace.

    Are There Any New Content Coming Up?

    Honestly most of what will be new is what I slowly become comfortable with on cam. I have been playing the long game with my room and we like to flirt and take our time together.

    Nerdy Girl – I’m 5’9” and 145lbs. Interested in male/female/trans. Studying Bacteria Stuff in Microbiology. In my free time I like hiking and traveling adventures!

    Follow Nerdy Girl on

    Chaturbate: nerdygirl30

    OnlyFans: nerdygirl30

    Email: nerdygirl1923@gmail.com       

    Instagram: @Nerdygirl1923

    Twitter: @nerdygi91733947

    I cam with a friend and her Chaturbate is pinkpineapple63, but we cam on my Chaturbate – nerdygirl30.

    Article images courtesy of Nerdy Girl

    Like to be featured on SimplySxy? Drop us an email at editorial@SimplySxy.com!

  • A New Era of Sex on Cam?

    A New Era of Sex on Cam?

    Is cybersex the new normal? Some might argue, yes! Now more than ever, people are getting it on, online. Couples and singles alike are keeping it safe and sexy through texting, image sharing, and video chatting in lieu of the traditional hookup. Adult webcam sites are exploding in popularity, with recent traffic skyrocketing to record-breaking numbers. 

    We can easily attribute this recent trend to the ongoing coronavirus pandemic. Earlier this year, widespread lockdowns decimated the in-person dating scene with mass business closures that hit bars, restaurants, and clubs the hardest. Because of COVID-19’s contagious nature, hooking up was out of the question. 

    Even now, with somewhat relaxed restrictions being the norm for most places around the world, global health officials gravely advise everyone to stay home as much as possible and avoid contact with those outside your immediate household if you can.

    This level of isolation, of course, led the New York Health Department to give New Yorkers a serious “talk” about our sexual activity during the pandemic in the form of an official memo. The memo encourages them to have safe, socially distant sex using webcams instead of risky in-person meetups. 

    While this may have been news to some, tech-savvy citizens have been having webcam sex long before the coronavirus outbreak. With features like Skype and Facetime having been out for years, its safe to say that modern couples more than likely already know their way around a webcam, and this isn’t some sudden leap into a technological dystopian world without real live sex. The fact is some of the best porn cams have tens of millions of registered users.

    Entering relationships and engaging in sex online is nothing new. Online dating through websites and apps has been around for decades, with most 21st century singles having created a profile on at least one of them at some point during their lifetimes. 

    With or without a pandemic to nudge us along, modern humans are already accustomed to using technology for our sexual gratification. After all, no one with access to the Internet is exclusively jacking it to skin magazines anymore.

    Instead, porn fans are turning to live cam shows en masse. Live cam shows do what videos won’t: listen and respond in real time. These interactive shows create an intimacy between a cam model and their viewers that modern audiences love. Other popular media formats like Twitch and Youtube create spaces for relatable everyday people to be heard and, more importantly, admired, and the realm of virtual sex shows is no different. 

    This craving for online proximity is merely magnified by the fact that during these stressful times, our friendships and romances are being put on trial with no clear end in sight. Without the usual spaces for socialization available, people are turning to the Internet for relief. 

    As such, cam models don’t just provide an outlet for sexual frustration, but an overall angst towards the current climate as well. In the age of sex on cam, cam sites provide a forum of bonding and healing in ways that videos cannot, and the proof is in their newfound popularity.

    Featured image by Nycolle Suabya from Pexels

    Like to be featured on SimplySxy? Drop us an email at editorial@SimplySxy.com!