What It’s Like To Be An Escort In Germany
Becoming an escort was not a decision based on just one reason. Of course it gives me more financial freedom and I have enough time to study sociology and gender studies, to take care of my three dogs and enjoy my private life. But if money would be the only reason, I would not do it very long with so much passion. I love that, with every date I have a new opportunity being the perfect companion and I can create a connection with this person. I always liked about sex that it makes men honest in a special way. In my experience men mostly show their pure self completely being in the moment through erotic intimate moments. Probably it is hard to play a role when most of your blood is centered between your legs. Therefore, already before being an escort I loved to have sex with different men to get to know them in all facets.
I like to find a unique way to create a connection with every single customer. Humans generally want to feel safe and loved. To be able to give someone this feeling that he can open up himself in my company is something I really enjoy. As an escort, I have a safe space where I can enjoy erotic and intimate connections for the time I am booked. Nobody gets hurt because of potential expectations for the time afterwards and one top I get paid for a shared amazing date experience.
When I started as an escort, I didn’t tell my friends and family about it or asked for their advice. I knew they would love me no matter what as long as I am happy. So I knew they would also worry about me and based on prejudice probably try to change my decision. After around one year as an escort, I had already told my best friends about it and I figured out that I didn’t want to hide a big part of my life for the next years from my friends and family. Now I have a much deeper and more honest relationship to my family and they support me to be happy and accept my choices. I tell them everything and support them. I enjoy support and love from all my friends and family and it has been the best decision to be honest and stand behind my choices.
What Made Me Decide To Escort
I started escorting in the end of 2016. Even if it is legal in Germany, there are still a lot of negative prejudice about this industry. Nevertheless, to be an escort somehow has always been attractive in my imagination. I tended to be less attracted by the ideal of a monogamous relationship leading into marriage, a house and two kids. On the contrary, I have been attracted by the experience of creating a connection with another person. I wanted to explore the unique and special chemistry each relationship is built on.
Therefore, I enjoyed to date a lot of different people over different time periods. Every time I thought about working as an escort. I was fascinated by the idea but scared about the negative consequences for my social life. So it took me some time and I needed to live one my own for a while till I was brave enough to face my responsibility of doing what feels right for myself. When I then thought about which work could suit my passion, escorting felt like the right answer and it still does!
What It Is Like Being An Escort In Germany
The biggest difference to many other countries like the US is probably that in Germany, escorting is a legal profession. When you work as an escort, you have to get the required papers at the city office and you have to pay taxes as in every other legal business. Even if in Germany, the content of the prostitution law takes place in many critical discussions, there is at least a law that provides the rights of legal work. Anyway, sex work in general has to deal with many negative prejudice. Therefore, to avoid social exclusion, many sex workers keep their job a secret.
In Germany, it is more common for an escort to work with an agency than independently. Respectively, many agency websites can be found on the internet. Still, as in every other industry, you have to figure out which one fits best for your priorities. The good ones provide many detailed information on their websites.
Being An Independent Escort vs Working For An Agency
I started with an agency and now I work more and more as an independent escort as well. In general, I think it is a matter of lifestyle for everyone, whether working with an agency or alone is the better way. It is a matter of priority and time. For some, escorting is just a side job, for others it is a full time work with the character of even a life choice. As an independent, you have to do all the work and organization around your online representation and your dates on your own. You make every decision so you are the one who is responsible.
An agency offers you to work with someone who knows the industry and can give you advice and support. The agency organizes everything for you like screening your clients, the communication and your marketing. Therefore, the agency charges a provision for every organized date. As an independent escort, you keep your full fee from every date but you have to invest as well in your website, in your advertising and what else is needed to support your business. If you want to decide everything yourself and above that you have enough time to do all the work yourself, you might not need an agency.
To work with an agency basically means to outsource some work and pay them for their service. In this case still, you should compare the different agencies to see if find you one that suits you before you make a choice. A good agency works together with you and the work is based on respect and trust from both sides.
Things That The Escorting Industry Can Improve On
The escort industry in Germany is just one part of the sex work industry. In general, I wish as a first step, that all countries would decriminalize the whole industry. The law should define sex work as legal work in a way which respects and protects all sex workers as a part of the society. A law just issued control will not change the social acceptance. That’s why in Germany, there are still social stigmata and many negative prejudice.
For me, this was the reason I didn’t tell anyone in the beginning about my profession. When you do it just for a while it might work but I think that hiding a part of your life from everybody costs as much energy and can hurt yourself a lot. The worst experience I made as an escort has been the feeling of a growing distance towards my friends, family and my private life. I loved escorting as a part of my life but I lived a life pretending escorting wouldn’t be a part of it.
The decision to change that has affected my life in many positive ways. I wish everybody in this industry that they don’t have to struggle because of hiding their job.
Considerations Before You Become An Escort
As pointed out, I do have many positive feelings about being escort and I collect many positive experiences. However, there are not only nice people out there. Some want to take advantage of you, some might not accept your boundaries. You should be certain of what you want and what your boundaries are as well as how you can assure they’re kept. You should know how to screen your clients before dates and make sure you know what kind of a person your client is.
Moreover, a safe meeting place is crucial. You need to decide whether you want to start as an independent or with an agency. Find a way to get support and the knowledge you need. Find an agency to work with or other sex workers to support you and give you advice. You should consider as well how you can manage to integrate the job into your life and combine it with your private life, and last but not not least, how you can keep the two of them separated from each other.
Irina Le Fey – I am a cute, high energy, open minded girl from Germany. I love hiking in the wild nature and dating to explore human culture. Meet me as your little island to escape the ocean of daily life.
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