Connect with us

Holding on or Letting go

Photo: Morguefile


Holding on or Letting go

There are two choices in life – holding on or letting go.  On a number of instances, I have been faced with that difficult decision-making.  Every single time, it never gets any easier for me.  It seems that whichever choice I make, there is either a resolution or a consequence that comes with it.

It is funny how we tend to hold on too much onto something or someone that contains a lot of memories in them.  Regardless of the setting that we are in or we are going to be, somehow we still want to bring them with us no matter what.  This recognition of such a general truth is applicable to every context usage in our lives, be it on things, on people, and on issues with our selves.

We should know when it is already time to walk away and let go, as well as when it is necessary to hold on and fight.

Letting go is not a one-time-big-time thing.  It happens every day.  I see it as a resolute choice to make, in which there is no turning back anymore.  You do not get to press any rewind button and restart all over again.  When you let go, a part of you dies inside and it is that kind of death that is irrevocable.  But sometimes, letting go can be very helpful and it does us the favour of making our lives less complicated.  When we let go, it is like throwing something heavy off our chest and recognizing that life is better without it.  From time to time, it is necessary to let go of things and people, especially those that are becoming a burden to us. In letting go, we realize that it is either the healthiest choice we have ever made or something that we will regret for always.

On the other hand, most people think that letting go is the hardest choice that we will have to encounter in life.  I would have agreed to that if I had no experience of it first-hand.  But, because I do know and based on my own familiarity, I now beg to disagree to that belief.  As an unsolicited opinion, holding on is more enigmatic than letting go, especially when we are the only ones who want things to stay exactly the way they are.

Holding on can be very debilitating in the long run.  I am not trying to promote the concept that we should not follow our heart’s desires, but when we hold on to something or someone for far too long, it becomes a habit and habits are usually hard to break.  At the very least, we should always see to it that whatever or whoever we are holding on to, should be worth it.  We must keep in mind that regardless of losing that one thing or that one person we are desperately holding on to, we do not lose ourselves in the process.

It is not that holding on is a detrimental option.  I am not against it.  In fact, most of the time, I find myself holding on to things and to people more often than I should.  However, I found out that not because we are holding on means we are doing what is more glorious.  It is about the ‘why’ and the ‘what for’ behind it.  In the end, we will have to honestly answer to ourselves if our reasons are worth it or not.

In life, we will always find ourselves in a quandary as to whether to hold on or to let go.  When we reach that point wherein we need to make a choice, we should reflect upon and assess the situation carefully and subjectively, and not in a biased manner.  It is important to use both our minds and our hearts to evaluate the pros and cons.  It is true that our feelings and emotions can magnify our thoughts and we may end up making the wrong choice.  But it is also true that in some situations, when we follow our hearts, we will never go wrong.  That is one of life’s ironies.  Living life is never a facile and carefree thing to do.  As they say, you win some and you lose some.  You just have to make up your mind, be firm with whatever choice you make, and not look back at it with regret.

Yes, there are two choices in life which we make every day.  There are a lot of hurdles to pass through and we have to know which ones are worth letting go and holding on, because what it all comes down to is not just about winning the gold but about the sacrifices made and what was left until the very end.


Maria Solita Zaldivar-Guzman, better known as Em-Em to her family and friends, is the editor-in-chief and the publisher of Raven Magazine, Aklan’s eco-tourism and lifestyle magazine which was established on June 2013. She also works as a columnist for Western Visayas (Boracay) Informer and has a weekly column entitled Cloud Watching. She is the executive secretary of the local chief executive of the municipality of Nabas, Mayor James V. Solanoy. Her writings were published in The Philippine Daily Inquirer – Youngblood and in Inquirer Jr., Singapore online website, Ireland online website and in Opinion’s Post.


More in Lifestyle

To Top