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It’s Only Kinky The First Time

Kink

It’s Only Kinky The First Time

Hi there,

When the creators asked me to write a column for Smply Sxy, I thought what else is there to say about kink exploration that you haven’t heard before?  Then it hit me, maybe you hadn’t heard what I’ve researched and learned from half a century of kinky play.   In Los Angeles, we have dozens of public play dungeons, nightclubs and private play parties to keep you out every night of the week.  It’s a weekly competition to do something new in the kink scene here.

file2901246197549I frequently receive email and calls from people looking to explore that secret sexual desire that is just beyond the normal penetrative sexual experience.   I call it your ‘kinky itch’ that won’t go away.   We know that the way to mastery is through information and practice and with kink it’s just a lot more fun doing the lab work.  By expanding your erotic intelligence you grow a new set of intellectual muscles, intuitive skills, emotional connections and spiritual resonance.

When you begin your exploration of kinky sexuality you pursue better health.  Psychologist Esther Perel in her book “Mating In Captivity” describes sexual fantasy as important and necessary to feed our ‘emotional hunger’.

Sexual fantasy is like a dream.  Dreams are the subconscious way of communicating your emotions and issues in metaphor and stories that hopefully you can interpret.  Ignore the dream and they get stronger and can become nightmares or a repeated story that won’t go away.   Pursuing the ‘kink itch’ feeds the emotional need and curiosity your body is expressing.

How kinky are you?  Well there are thousands of fetishes, some healthy, others not.  You need more than sexual drive to manoeuvre through what works for you and this column will hopefully be that guide and mentor along the way to save you from the bumps in the road.

So your job is to ask the questions.  Send them anonymously if you like.  I’ll share the answers I have learned and also what I’m hearing, seeing and feeling in the dungeon.

I aim to be pleased,

Mistress Serene

Mistress Serene

Mistress Serene is an erotic intelligence coach, arm chair adviser, philosopher, BDSM educator, and practitioner. She is an author of “All My Heroes Were Ho’s, Life Lessons From the Dungeon” and an upcoming short story collection “Firsts, Our Coming of Age Stories”. Her company Serene Sin produces a line of sensual toys call Love Bites Gloves. She is a frequent radio and Internet show guest and author appearing on Playboy and Spice Radio, Dr. Julie Block, Size Matters with Lexington Steele, Leatherati.com, TSR Networks, The Fetish Show and presented nationally at DESIRE: Leather Women Unleashed, Evolution Revolution and Leather Leadership Conference.

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