Tag: Special Feature

Pixie Dust in the Air: SongKran9 Review

There is no dance floor big enough for gCircuit. Two weeks has pass since SongKran9 and the music is still beating in my heart. The biggest gay circuit party in Asia has truly lived up to its name and hype. The three day event spanning from 10th to 12th April includes three night parties and two pool parties. With an estimated six thousand party goers a night, I would describe the experience at SongKran9 a supersized “a night at the club”; the music was definitely spectacular, the crowd partied harder and the air was cleansed with pixie dust.

When you stepped onto the SongKran9 red carpet you are greeted by hot models from the different partners and sponsors of the event. From Atlantis Cruise, which does gay cruise in US and Europe, to Jack’d, one of the most popular global gay app, your eyes can’t help but wonder. Three booths stood out. The first was testbkk.org. They had an impressive boxing ring themed booth in sleek black and gold complete with sexy models in boxing attire. Their motto “Suck, F*#K, Test, Repeat” is a coy reminder that even though many of us are indulging in the process of sucking, f*#king, and repeating, we cannot neglect the importance of testing. For an NGO of HIV and STI awareness, they have an impressive PR campaign.

Next was Pure Bliss Weddings, a wedding planning company for LGBT that is based in Phuket. Not only was taking pictures in their beach themed booth fun, talking to the planners about the different weddings that are taking place in our region is an eye opener. It gives one hope that the society is progressing even though we do not have legalised marriage for our community in Asia yet.

Lastly was SongKran9’s own booth where you have the chance to meet and greet the GoGo boys who will be performing. The month leading up to the event, one only gets a sneak peak of who the GoGo dancers are from gCircuit facebook page. However, to have a chance to meet them is another thing altogether. The highlight is being able to meet SongKran9’s brand ambassador Peter Le. Despite the star power shrouding him, Peter is a very humble and stand up man. The way that he carried himself and interacted with his fans was nothing short of impressive.

Upon entering the dance floor, you will be amazed by its sheer size. Being there early, I was able to see how the void began to slowly fill up with the heat from party goers, the thirsty for fluids and the need for a rad beat. The opening DJs were fanatics. My personal favorite was opening DJ Louis T. He had the right mix of tribal music that could keep me going for hours. After experiencing the beat of the opening DJs over the three days, I feel that each and every one of them have the qualities to be a main DJ at the next big circuit party.

It was only when the dance floor was packed enough then did the performance for the WICKED party began. All the dancers and models who we meet earlier came on stage with more than enough confetti to ignite the night. From the elevated view of the VIP, one could see the intricate tango between the main DJ, the GoGo boys and lights show. Even the WICKED party was filled with the excitement excited of a virgin experience, the NEON party which is the second night’s party you can see that the GoGo dancers are really up their game. They brought about more energy than the night before and were able to maintain the high energy level dance after dance. Placing NEON party as a leader in the running for the best party of the five. However, the prediction was pre-mature. This is because the opening sequence of the PHARAOH party was the most erotic thing I have ever seen in my life.

The GoGo boys were dressed like Egyptian Kings.
They had sexy servants waiting on their every hand and foot.
These Gods dance sensually with each other in a vessel that descended from the heavens.
While their servants bathed them in milk.

The first thing that came out of my mouth when the performance ended was , “I think I just wet myself”. It is hard to determine which party was the best as each one was different. Even the pool party has its own set of fun. It was a nice break from dancing in the dark. The pool party encompasses the vibe of the water festival element of the actual Thai New Year. Having hundreds of topless guys in sexy swim trunks playing with water. Who can ask for more?

However, no party is perfect and if one were to look around, one would be able to find some unhappy and bored party goers. The SongKran9 teams still works tirelessly to put up a good show. At the front of the house, one can see the Drag Queens, Miss GiGi and Siva entertaining the new party arrivals. Even the PR director, Jom, has made it a tradition to come all dressed up in Drag. Much credit also goes to Yoss who designed the beautiful outfits for the GoGo Boys and Drag Queens. The countless tech and backstage crew were instrumental in ensuring that everything ran smoothly. Together with Tom and Oui, it is unquestionable that these folks are serious about partying and definitely know how to run a good show. With a successful ninth year under their belt, you know that when SongKran10 comes along next 15th to 17th April 2016, it is sure to be bigger, better, bolder … and a ton more of pixie dust in the air.

*For event pictures, refer to the following links
Day 1: WICKED Party
Day 2: NEON Party
Day 3: WASH and PHARAOH Party

Image courtesy of gCircuit
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April 25, 2015
The Gay Asian DJs

When you are dancing your heart out in the club, how aware are you of the DJ up there? I find myself saying “Oh, I like this DJ” or “I don’t like this DJ”. Who are these people behind the music? Does local DJs have what it takes to hold a global audience when masked behind a westernized beat? In the upcoming SongKran9 circuit party, we have three DJs who are all more than well qualified to be opening DJs: DJ Louis T from Malaysia for Wicked party, DJ Head from Hong Kong for Neon party and DJ Spectrum K from Thailand for Pharaoh party. SimplySxy takes the time out to get to know them better.

SimplySxy: When did you start DJing—and what or who were your early passions and influences?

DJ Louis T: I think probably 10 years ago and during that time, my influences were Danny Tenaglia, Peter Rauhofer, Victor Calderone and DJ Paulo too. I was in love with progressive house and tribal music. The tribal sound back in those days was different than current one.
DJ Head: I started DJing 6 years ago, and I attribute my early motivation to a dear friend and mentor, Mr. Tony Moran.
DJ Spectrum K: I love music at a very young age and have collected a lot of CDs. From CDs and music, I learn to speak English.

SimplySxy: What do you personally consider to be the incisive moments in your artistic career?

DJ Louis T: There are a few moments. The first of cause is the moment when I saw how my music brought joy to people, that always makes me smile. I will start to take pictures and videos to capture those moments. Secondly, whenever I am hired for a big party or gigs like Mardigras 2012 in Sydney Australia and even my first SongKran party in Bangkok. During these parties when I see people enjoying themselves, it makes me jump up and down with them as well.
DJ Head: The publication of my first compilation by NERVOUS RECORDS.
DJ Spectrum K: In every (artistic) process there is an incisive moment. When you get the feeling that everything seems to make sense that is an incisive moment. Like when I look forward to go to work, feeling happy about my work and seeing a happy audience. It reminds me that my career in the music business is the right one.

SimplySxy: What are the main challenges as a DJ and producing your own music?

DJ Louis T: My main challenge is to manage my time between DJing, making music and my day job. I often exhausted flying around, come back and start work the next day. But when I am on my deck doing my stuff, everything else stop. I am totally focused and push all other worries aside. The music energizes me and I am not tired. I just want to play good music to the crowd. Plus the crowds keep me going the whole night.
DJ Head: My main challenge is to maintain a good balance of giving the crowd what they want and what I would like them to hear. Producing music is like cooking a meal, no matter how good your food is, your ultimate satisfaction comes from sharing.
DJ Spectrum K: My main challenges as a DJ is to know how to please my audience without changing my style. I would like to produce my own music if I find the time and the right moment. At this point, I am just happy to see my happy audience dancing with me rather than lock myself alone and do music.

SimplySxy: Do you believe in the possibility of “reading an audience”—and how do you put it into practice? Is the relationship with the GoGo dancers a collaborative one or a battle?

DJ Louis T: It is important to read the audience and play what makes them happy but it is also important to make sure you stay within your style and to play a set that you yourself enjoy. I always believe if I myself do not enjoy the music, then the set sucks. With the GoGo dancers, we need to have connection and communication. It is important too to play the right sexy beat so they can do their best to make the night great. It is never a battle, it is a collaboration. Usually we talked about this before the night, and I am a friend to most of them. I love them.
DJ Head: Reading the audience is necessary, which is why you want a live set. As for GoGo dancers, it really depends on the production. I work with organizers to make sure that the performances would enhance the set but if say, the timing, frequency or lighting etc. is off then it could be distracting to say the least.
DJ Spectrum K: All this should come naturally when you are in the club, you can see people how they react. The main focus is the body language whether people are happy, dancing and enjoying. All this will show on their face. As for GoGo boys, it is mostly collaborative but sometimes, a GoGo show changes its mood when they want to perform other types of music or the show is running too long. That makes the audience lose their rhythm and the DJ has to restart the uplifting mood again, unless the GoGo dancers are the professional ones who are able to dance hand in hand with the DJ music style.

SimplySxy: How much, do you feel, is the club experience shaped by cultural differences? Do you, when travelling, take these cultural differences into consideration when DJing?

DJ Louis T: There will be cultural differences in different countries of course. I often find the Asians love their vocals and tribal, not much After Hour. In the West, lesser vocals, more After Hour, stronger tribal and they love to be teased (in music form). Traveling helps me to experiment new styles that fit these cultures but I often try to stick back to my style as much as possible.
DJ Head: Cultural differences are not as big as one may think in this subject, although I do get inspired by different cultures in different cities and also at different times.
DJ Spectrum K: When I get asked by friends “Where are you travelling next?” and I may say Seoul, or Guangzhou “China” (to name a couple). Their replies are always “Wow, do they have a scene?” or “Do they have clubs?” or “How do they know about dance music?”, or the best one is “Do they dance differently?” It’s funny because people learn and change. At first, Guangzhou’s side seems quiet and people don’t know how to dance but eventually, they learn and start to appreciate the music. With the social media, no city is left far behind for long. You can always find people who know how to party and appreciate good music in each city. So yeah, culturally speaking, festivals and clubs worldwide are slightly different. Some are more vocal than the others (yelling, screaming, enthusiasm) or they might allow smoking or not, or drinking or not, or age limits on entry. But this is everywhere, and I don’t see it so much as a cultural thing. Living and working in Bangkok allows me to try different things and being able to stay in touch with social media lets me get the latest music information. Due to the social media, almost everywhere is the same. Everyone knows each other so there is no great difference where you spin or work with different crowds.

SimplySxy: How or what do you feel is the difference between DJs from Europe and USA as compared to Asian DJs or yourself. What edge do you feel that Asian DJs might have?

DJ Louis T: In my opinion, Asian DJs are very adaptable to different genres of music. Europe and USA DJs are very loyal to their roots and style. Asian DJs are also experimental.
DJ Head: The circuit scene is dominated by music from USA and Europe so an Asian DJ does not really have so much an edge other than his fan base.
DJ Spectrum K: Most Europe and USA DJs are well appreciated and respected compared to Asian DJ or maybe Thai DJ. I guess it’s the branding and how they market themselves. Most people will think that since the DJ is from overseas, he/she has got to be famous or popular. It is sad that Asian people don’t really support their own local DJs. Although I might not as popular as other European, American DJs, I do have fans who do appreciate me and I do consider myself blessed.

SimplySxy: Since this article is for Simplysxy, what is your definition of Sexy?

DJ Louis T: On people? Charisma, communication and talent. On music? A Sexy bass line.
DJ Head: Profundity is sexy as I believe the art of seduction lies in enticing the object to further exploration.
DJ Spectrum K: Everyone has a different definition of sexy but my sexy is all about good attitude and letting yourself go and have fun, stop being uptight, let your hair down, be humble and be nice. Leave the attitude behind when you are in the dance floor and that is what I called “sexy”.

Check out our next Songkran9 article on the 10 Things you need to get ready for the Songkran9 Pool Party!

https://soundcloud.com/dj-louist

https://soundcloud.com/dj-spectrum-k

Image courtesy of gCircuit
Have an amazing experience or tips you like to share on SimplySxy? Drop us an email at editorial@SimplySxy.com!

March 21, 2015
SEX. PARTY.

Who Needs Romance When You Can Just Have the Sex?

Valentine’s Day is beyond cheesy. There. I’ve said it.

Sure, I am all up for celebrating love and that fine romance (and cheese), but definitely not on this day, which has become too commercialised to the point that retailers are obviously milking it for all its worth by marking up the prices of their items and coming up with annoying “Valentine’s Day” promotions. Don’t waste all that hard-earned money, boys and girls! (Findings show that Singaporeans are some of the biggest spenders on V-Day. Tsk tsk.)

So, instead of observing the 14th of February as how the mainstreamers have marketed and perceived it to be – lovey-dovey saccharine sweet to the point of diabetic – why not turn the day on its head and make it an Anti-Valentine’s Day instead? And what’s the polar opposite of romance? Why, the answer is sex, of course. And it’s not just sex (singular), but lots and lots of unabashed, no-strings-attached sex.

Also, since Valentine’s Day is supposedly all about that one person in your life, and we are all about making a 180 degrees turn here, Anti-Valentine’s Day shall thus be about le sex with multiple partners. Maybe even all at the same time. You know what this means, right?

SEX. PARTY.
Now this is one sexperience that I have yet to try (no, going to saunas is not equivalent to sex parties; at least not for me). I have always been curious about the mechanics of it all: how and where do you gather the participants? Where will it be held? How long does a party last? Must the number of tops, bottoms and/ or flexes be proportionate to each other? Who will be the one to provide the safety equipment? Is it a bare-it-all from the get-go or do people walk around in their underwear first? Is it safe? Will the police ever find out and raid such shindigs? What about the hotel staff and people staying there? Will they not be curious? And these are just some immediate questions off the top of my head!

The idea of a sex party (aka orgy/ gang bang/ what have you) is not unheard of, not an entirely new phenomenon, and is most certainly – at least nowadays – not that overtly hush hush, especially in today’s context. In fact, I have heard stories of such parties taking place here in the sunny island that sets in the sea. (Again, those recent news about brothels in neighbourhood estates do not count. We are talking about a party, not a mechanical barter sex trade.)

One of my exes frequented these sex parties (don’t ask me if the ex still attends them now) and from what I have gathered, the whole set-up is not as sleazy as you may think. Most of the time, these parties are held in swanky, five-star hotels. Participants from all walks of life either get personally invited or register their interest to attend to the lead organiser. Time and date has already been set prior; all you need to do is show up and have fun. Naturally I followed that up with even more questions: how do you indicate to the other party your interest in them? What if the two of you turned out to be of the same role? And, the most important question that kept running through my head: do you do it in full view of the other participants, or do you do it somewhere secluded? Because I am thinking that the only place where you can have private access is clearly the (spacious) bathroom!

Even after pressing my ex for the answers to my questions, I am still left unsatisfied. Thoughts start running through my head. Is it as classy as what Tom Cruise and Nicole Kidman attended in Eyes Wide Shut? Or is it more of a fun affair, like the ones Billie Piper had been to while sharing with us her Secret Diary of a Call Girl? Or maybe it’s just sex-OTT like in the pornos, complete with chains, leather, whips, handcuffs and all? Hmmm.

With my curiosity having been immensely piqued, I suppose it is finally time to get down to that item on my sexperience bucket list and participate in at least one sex party by this month; my Valentine’s sexlist, if you will. Maybe I will end up with like-minded individuals who believe in the same Anti-Valentine’s sentiments as I do. Then we can do it all through the night (or day, depending on what time the party is being held.)

Like I said: who needs romance when you can just have the sex?

Image courtesy of Shutterstock
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February 14, 2015
Alone for Valentine’s?

Alone for Valentine’s? You CAN Still Get Off…

… with yourself. Who says that you have to be partnered and who has the audacity to condition you into thinking that Valentine’s Day is only for lovers? As you will know if you have read my column here on SimplySxy before – I am a great fan of masturbation. I am also a believer in the art of self-love so let’s get to it…

Picture it: Valentine’s Day 2015, you, yourself and a box of tricks 😉 Draw the blinds, turn the lights down low and get yourself ready by taking a romantic bath with flickering candles and soft music in the background.

And if you’re struggling to picture that, if you can’t quite see how to make that much effort ‘just’ for yourself, allow me to tell you a story…

Once upon a time I was in the supermarket where I go very regularly and the girl at the checkout knows me well. I was putting my produce of a huge turkey, candles, bottle of Champagne, sumptuous dessert and various entrées and nibbles onto the conveyor belt and as she was scanning the items she said:

‘Expecting company?’

‘No’ I replied

‘I thought you lived on your own?’ said the cheeky cashier.

‘I do. This is all for me. I’m taking myself to dinner’ she looked a little shocked, then confused. It seems that we as human beings are looked upon as ‘odd’ when we show ourselves some lovin’. I find this incredibly sad. I also find it depressing that so many of us actually dread ‘VDay’ – sounds a little like ‘D-Day’ don’t you think?

So how can you take a tip or two from my supermarket experience? Can you take yourself to dinner on Valentine’s and make love to yourself all night long? I’ve written loads about masturbation and how to get you off but I have also written loads about how loneliness can kill us from the inside out. Let’s put a stop to that right now and realise that we are worth it.

Let me just give you a few more practical hints to get you going…

You know that ‘box of tricks’ I mentioned? Well you can turn this into a treasure chest by placing your favourite sex toys, underwear (man) lingerie (woman), cock rings, clit teasers, candles, scented oils and maybe even your favourite DVD and/or magazine which may or may not be porn related. Whatever floats your boat. Then… keep the box for special occasions just as you would save your special underwear for that special guest.

Tonight you are that special guest. You are in for a treat…

Do as I described previously: dim the lights and get yourself in the mood to really take the time to enjoy your body and your evening alone with the best person you know: you.

Please do also take a look at my previous articles here on SimplySxy on Masturbation, which will take you to the place few have been – a place so special it would be a shame to miss out by distracting yourself with a night on the town. You can go out on the town anytime – make this night for YOU.

Choose this moment on this day to really remind yourself what love is all about. Don’t get drawn into all that commercialised crap and simply be the sexy loving human being that you are. I trust you … Yes: I do 🙂

Image courtesy of Shutterstock
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February 12, 2015
Have A Sexciting Vday
Have a Sexciting Vday!!

Life has been monotonous enough, and you are telling me that you just want to go through the motion this Valentine’s day with your wife? Come on!!

Do something out of the norm for you wife. How about a naughty evening for a change? Many times, women complain that their men do not spend enough time gearing thing up, or enough effort spicing things up. Guys, it’s time to take the lead this Valentines day!

Instead of paying a premium in restaurants and on roses, DIY everything YOUR sexy way at home!
1. Get home early to cook – in only an apron over your body to get yourself in the mood. Feel the air brushing through your skin and you will feel sexy instantly. Wait for her to return home.
2. Play some sexy jazzy music on the hi-fi. Humans are visual and audio creatures. Music gets yourself in the mood while waiting for her return.
3. When she gets ‎home, welcome her in that apron suit. Have a good kiss at the door before welcoming her to sit at the dining table. She should be very shocked by now.
4. Also get her to put on an apron, just like you. Instead of a usual gift, give her a sexy gift for this Valentine’s day. How about some sexy Babydolls? A naughty vibrator? Something that she will feel sexy in/on?
5. Instead of a ‎bouquet of flowers, how about a jar of condoms or edible undies?? Something that is really unexpected. By now, ladies already know what they are in for. The rest is up to your creativity to spice it up and create the fireworks that you want.
6. Have a good conversation over dinner. Please, gentleman, meet her needs FIRST!! No getting into action yet, let the sexual excitement build up through your attention towards her. Many women complain that they lose attractiveness in the eyes of their husband as they age. Proof this wrong to her through your undivided attention to her. Make sure you esteem her and edify her like you have never done it before. Even though you think she already knows, that’s not the point. She loves to hear it from you, again and again. So do it if you want what you want at the end of the night. Women love it!
7. Have some dessert wine (Ladies love them). Some alcohol makes the night a little more colorful. A little tipsy in a safe environment such as your own house is perfectly fine. In fact, it is so wonderful because there is nothing to worry about. Let yourself loose and let your heart take you home.
8. Have a small strip poker game or adult board game. You both have only 1 piece to strip anyway. It shall take you into action very soon.
9. End off the night whichever way u like it. It is time for your needs to be met, gentlemen. Make sure you make it memorable with a tight cuddle at the end. Let the tingling sensation linger after the fireworks to rekindle the love and affirmation.
So there you have it! Something different this Valentine’s day. You are free to add in any segment that fits your taste or fantasy. Remember, so something different, challenge your creativity in the realm of sexuality. I am sure you can rekindle the love between you and your spouse through a small act of creativity.

Image courtesy of Shutterstock
Have an amazing experience or tips you like to share on SimplySxy? Drop us an email at editorial@SimplySxy.com!
February 9, 2015
My Saucy Valentine Sex list
Valentine’s Day. I love this day. It gives me the perfect excuse to spend my days leading up to it dreaming of endless possibilities and lists in pampering my partner, to indulge my partner in a night of unforgettable memories amidst our busy schedules.

I have always created different possibilities when it comes to Valentine’s Day. Questions of: What can I do to make this year a little more special, to create a magical night of discovery and exploration, a night of uninterrupted explosive sex that would push boundaries and create new undiscovered sensations. Why, I create a sexlist of course. My Valentine’s Sexlist. A sex list gets me prepared for a night of good expectations. It gets me psyched up and ready for what is to come.

My sex list always starts with the mood. How do I set the mood right for Valentine’s Day:
1. Candles. Nothing screams mystery and romance more than entering a dimly lit room, inhaling the scent of sweetness mixed with candle wax burning, flicking in the darkness of the room.
2. Wine. Alcohol in small amounts will increase your libido and make you feel flushed. Now imagine this setting where you enter into a dimly lit room, with wine by your bedside. As you start sipping wine, allow yourself to be pampered by engaging in long foreplay and by teasing each other ever so slightly. A slight nibble on the ear, hands moving up thighs, sharing a sip of wine between kisses. There are endless possibilities when it comes to spicing up the mood with some wine at the beginning!
3. Chocolates. Just like wine, chocolates are known to increase desire, arousal and sexual satisfaction. After all, you are getting ready for a long exciting night, aren’t you?
With the mood set, my sex list would carry on to things that would create an exciting adventure for an unforgettable Valentine’s Day night. I want to treat my partner to a full sensuous feast, to tantalise every sensation and every fibre possible.
1. A sexy lingerie. Valentine’s Day is the day to be creative and open, to wear something that you might not wear on an ordinary day. Be it a crotchless panty; which could open up a ton of creativity, or a sexy two piece lingerie, it is the day to give your partner a visual treat for the eye, and to make him yearn for your body simply by teasing his sight. Guys, do not worry, for you can do the same. Put on a piece of tong, or a C-String and you can be assured that your lady appreciates more than just the visual treat she receives.
2. Get your partner a sex box which comprises everything needed to create an unforgettable, explosive and intimate Valentine’s Day. Our Saucy Secrets, a Singapore based company (www.oursaucysecrets.com) , has made my dream come true by putting together creative, intimate, fun and exciting packages for every one of us. Each box has been carefully thought through to ensure that couples not only have all the necessary tools needed for an unforgettable night of pleasure, but that there is a central theme running through these boxes, tying in every item in the box. It is an adventure waiting to be explored. I had the luxury of exploring Saucy’s Valentine’s Box with the theme (Back to Basics), and Saucy’s Kinky Box, and I got to say, it sure blew my mind with the sensations I encountered with my partner. Not only did I get to know my partner’s sexual preference better and experienced such heightened sensations through the Valentine’s Day Box, I also got to explore my kinkier side with blindfolds, handcuffs and whips with the Kinky Box. It was sensuality at its best.
3. Foreplay. My Valentine’s Sexlist cannot do without foreplay. This is the night of romance and sexuality, the night where I want to take as much time as I can, pampering and teasing my partner slowly. It is a night that should result in an explosive orgasm, a night of unforgettable memory.
All images courtesy of Our Saucy Secrets.
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February 8, 2015
SongKran9: A gay love story

Come April, Thailand will be the host to Asia’s largest gay circuit party. Songkran9 is a three day circuit party event organized by gCircuit. This year, Songkran9 will span from 10 to12 April. This massive event will include three night parties and two pool parties with established DJs from around the world. One can expect to hear great music, see hot go-go dancers and meet wonderful people while parting the night away. gCircuit has created a solid brand that is known to all those who love to party.

The gCircuit brand is also synonymous with their founders, Tom and Oui. Tom and Oui are a loving gay couple that has been together for over 15 years. They met during Tom’s first trip to Bangkok. On his last night before flying home to Singapore, they crossed paths on the dance floor of a gay club and both knew it was love at first sight. However, the deck was stacked against them. On top of coming from a conservative family, Tom was only back in the region because it was his NYU summer vacation, hence adding more miles between them. In an effort to be together, Oui decided to fly to New York to study English. Upon Tom’s graduation two years later, Tom decided to settle down in Oui’s native country, Thailand. The couple has built their life in Bangkok ever since.

During the mid-2000s when Nation Party, a gay circuit party that was held in Singapore, was discontinued indefinitely, Oui suggested that they start their own circuit party. Base on their love for the dance floor and coupled with their entrepreneurial background, they decided to take on the journey and were determined to succeed. Tom felt that if they want to do a circuit party, then they had to do it right. The party should have the best DJs with the best go-go boys and be held at the best locations. There were many gay parties at that time that were held in rundown straight clubs and these were struggling to stay alive. Being mediocre was not an option for the couple. Tom and Oui wanted to have a party that was unique to Thailand, just like how the Nation parties was unique to Singapore. Hence, they choose the Songkran festival—a well known wet and wild water festival in Thailand that welcomes the Thai New Year.

This year, gCircuit celebrates its ninth circuit party and its success can be attributed to Tom and Oui’s passion and persistence. The couple has a lot of love for the LGBTQ community. They believe in listening to people and giving back. When they started, they only had a two night party. It subsequently expanded into three, when the demand grew. When the Bear community wanted a space where they would not feel judged, they decided to have an exclusive Bear pool party. The outreach and contribution of gCircuit goes beyond just a three day party. In 2013, gCircuit helped Standard Chartered bank roll out a suite of products called We+. This range of products allows unmarried couples, regardless of sexual orientation and gender identity, in committed relationship get loans and mortgages. This year, they are focus is on addressing the increase in number of HIV cases reported by UNAIDS. They want to help to create an innovative way to bring the awareness for the need for safe sex to the new generation. gCircuit is definitely headed towards bigger and bolder things.

The LGBTQ calendar is shaping up to be an exciting one with SongKran9 opening the year. So come April if you are looking for a place to power up your soul, remember there is a massive circuit party with a rich history down in the City of Angels.

Image courtesy of gCircuit
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January 23, 2015
Are Bert and Ernie Gay? 🙂

Bert and Ernie. Gay? Why is this important?

I was horrified to read years ago that Noddy and Big Ears were forced to deny ‘improper relationship’ in Toy Town. Not to be outdone, it appears that Bert and Ernie, the iconic residents (and roommates) of the long-running children’s TV series Sesame Street, have been ‘outed’ over their (assumed) sexual identity by no less than the New Yorker magazine in the wake of the US Supreme Court’s landmark ruling to overturn the Defence of Marriage Act.

In the cover image featured on the left, the couple are sitting on a couch with Bert’s arm wrapped around Ernie and Ernie’s head nestled against Bert’s shoulder. They are watching the Supreme Court decision granting same-sex couples the “equal liberty” guaranteed by the US constitution’s Fifth Amendment.

As the US grapples with serious economic and social challenges, the release of the cover image has provoked fierce debate, about the sexual orientation of this couple and the potential for litigation by Sesame Workshop—which owns the characters—against the magazine.

I loved the denial by Sesame Workshop back in 2007 opining: “[Bert and Ernie] are not gay, they are not straight, they are puppets. They do not exist below the waist.”

The characters Noddy and Big Ears and Bert and Ernie demonstrate friendship and conflict resolution in a manner that children can positively relate to. Is it really important that these characters have a label for their sexual orientation? Is the fact that these characters are friends not enough? Are these characters less educational, less relevant and potentially despicable if they exist below the waist?

What then is the optimum age to start to discuss the issue of sexual orientation with our kids?

I had an unexpected answer to this question during a recent visit to Israel; I was privileged to view a kindergarten session in a unique programme designed in collaboration with the national education system and the kindergarten departments in several city municipalities. In the gay centre in Tel Aviv, I was drawn to the delightful sound of children’s laughter as their male kindergarten teacher was blowing giant bubbles for the children to play with in the shade of the Meir Gardens next to the centre.

The notion that education begins in the kindergarten years takes on a real currency here as a team of psychologists, education counsellors, teachers and representatives of the education system have been developing a unique program, which would help kindergarten teachers’ deal with children who are raised in LGBT(lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender) families and acknowledge their special needs.

With LGBT parenthood on the rise, there is a need to introduce these new and non-traditional families to our community. Any child who is connected to general community media can see or hear discussion about gay marriage. Do we leave them to form their own opinions or do we step up to have conversations with our kids about respect for differences across the board? Do we introduce our kids to the possibility that they can like/dislike or agree/disagree with others while still enjoying mutual respect?

I believe that in a healthy society, it’s important to acknowledge that some children are part of a non-traditional family or are friends with other children from non-traditional families and to respect diversity while enjoying our individual sexual values.

As a psychosexual educator, parents often ask me how they can start conversations about sexual diversity with young children. I recommend, as a general rule, to trust kids to ask what they specifically want to know and to respond only to the questions they ask in basic terms. Once your child has processed that answer, and they have felt safe and respected to ask any questions, they will seek more information

Parents can use specific observations to help children understand differences such as comparison of different toes. Regardless of differences in sizes, shapes and colours of everyone’s toes, most people young and old, can still walk and play. Some people choose to decorate their toes and put them on display and others don’t. Grandma’s toes may hurt her at times but that doesn’t stop her from being loved and valued. Continue to build on that foundation to create discussions when opportune to raise differences in religious beliefs and traditions and the way different people express their love depending on their sexual identity or personality profiles.

When parents role model their own respect for differences and respond thoughtfully to occasional confusion over something new and different, they will allow their child to feel safe to explore their growing world and engage in further talks about sexuality.

I realized there was a need for a 21^st century tool to help parents and teachers manage the new challenges in communicating sexual respect and diversity. I wrote the sex education app for iPad ‘Parents, Tweens and Sex’ and designed it in collaboration with Swinburne University Design to support parents to have these confronting sexual conversations with their ‘tweens’ (10–13 year olds). I was motivated by my experience as a counselling psychologist and clinical sexologist and also as a parent to support other parents to be comfortable to have these conversations to enable them to share their personal values and ethics with their tweens.

One conversation starter in the ‘Parents, Tweens and Sex’ app examines the notion of ‘same, same but different’. In addition, it guides parents in discussions around choosing to celebrate people’s sexual differences while delighting in sameness. Go Bert and Ernie!

Images courtesy of Sarah Calleja, Kathy W

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June 28, 2014
Pink Pride

It is time to hit the gym and start eating healthy so as to look good for the different LGBT events that is happening in June 2014. This month’s calendar has suddenly become jam-packed with Shanghai Pride moving back to June and President Obama declaring June as LGBT Pride Month in the US. In anticipation for these events, let us review the top five moments for two major LGBT events that took place last year: Pink Dot and Taiwan Pride.

Pink Dot started around 5 p.m. and during this time you could find many laying down picnic mats, snacking on food and chatting with friends while basking in the evening sun. Just off the car park, there were booths of the different LGBT NGOs and event sponsors. If you took a walk around the park, you would be sure to stumble upon old friends. There were performances from various groups to entertain us and once the sky turned dark, everyone gathered towards the center of the park with their pink cellophane filters on their phones light for Pink Dot’s classic lit-up with an aerial photo shoot. There were about 21,000 attendees last year which was a record high for the Singapore LGBT event. Every year, the event gets bigger and this year will be no exception.

Taiwan Pride on the other hand began about 2 p.m. but the cool autumn breeze made the 4 km walk a joy. The parade route started and ended in front of Taipei City Hall. Passing by Sun Yat-sen Memorial and then going up Dunhua South before looping back to City Hall via Zhongxiao East. We saw many people dressed in sexy costumes, parade floats catering to different fetishes and people from varied walks of life striding side by side. When you have 60,000 people walking with you, the atmosphere is nothing short of electric.

Now for my personal top five moments of these two events.

Number five: There were a lot of hot and cute guys. I was surprised I did not get diabetes from all the eye candy. One advice for anyone attending these events for the first time is not to be shy. Please go up to anyone you like and say hello, take a picture, or get a number.

Number four: The Singapore flag flying pass during Pink Dot. Coincidentally on the very same day, the flight path of the Chinook carrying a giant Singapore flag for the National Day Parade rehearsal was over Hong Lim Park. The flag was accompanied by two Apaches which made it a truly marvelous sight to see.

Number three: Singing “Home” by Dick Lee after the Pink Dot light-up. Usually after the Pink Dot light-up, the event organizer will play the theme song for that year’s event. The song “Home” was last year’s song and it is a very emotional national song for many Singaporeans.

Number two: Taiwan Pride was just plain awesome. I could easily ramble on a list; walking with 60,000 people in the parade, the wonderful weather, having Taipei 101 in the backdrop, the people and the culture. You just have to be there in person to experience how magical Taiwan Pride can be.

Number one: Seeing the different minorities of the Taiwan LGBT community. Taiwan is much bigger in population then Singapore, which makes their LGBT minorities hard to remain unnoticed. During the parade, I had a chance to walk along many disabled LGBTs; some in wheelchairs and others born with birth defects. It really had me thinking about how difficult their life could be. It is not always fun and games in the LGBT community as there is a lot of discrimination within this unified rainbow. I empathized with them and realized how blessed my gay life has been.

Images courtesy of Pink Dot SG rally organizers © 2013 and Sahib Torun

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June 27, 2014
I Do, Do You?

Being a gay guy with quite a fair bit of failed relationships does not mean that the notion of marriage (or civil union or whatever you call it) does not cross my mind every once in a while. Not that I would picture myself in a wedding dress, but I do think about how my wedding ceremony and dinner will be like, what kind of band I am going to hire and what sort of food I am going to serve to my guests (yes, my guestlist is almost done with a few amendments). With each failed relationship, the dream wedding seemed to be further away, but I never did give up hope as I foresee my future with a partner till the end of time (or at least till death do us part).

Indeed, just merely two weeks ago, I was proposed to by my then-partner-now-turned-fiancé during our second anniversary celebration. Not really a tear-jerking moment or how I would have imagined it to be (there was no kneeling down or romantic scene and/or music playing at the background), but it served its purpose and I was touched, to say the least. However, many questions followed—Will there be a wedding? Should we start planning the reception now? Do we need to find a venue? Who can officiate at our wedding? Apparently according to my partner, the proposal is the ultimate peak of the relationship and we can now spend eternity together (I can almost hear the thunder in my head roaring). I pretty much guessed that there are fundamental cultural differences and misunderstandings between us (oh, did I mention that he’s Filipino and I am a true blue Singaporean).

A few of my close friends told me that since I have “chosen” this unconventional route of being with a guy, I would have to live without a wedding and that the marriage certificate is just a “piece of paper”. I gave them quite an earful, but not to the extreme. First of all, I did not “choose” to be with a guy as no one with a sane mind would choose a lifestyle where one has to struggle against peer pressure and social norms (basically to swim against the current just to find love). Second of all, I do not care about the certificate to be very honest, as I do not need the government to recognize the love I have for my man and vice versa. So why a wedding you ask? Simply because I want to share the joy and love of the holy matrimony with close friends and families and isn’t this what most weddings (regardless conventional or not) are about?

So like any good relationship’s advice, I “communicated” with thy fiancé and after extensive discussions with him, I can understand his reasons as to why a wedding is not in the line-up of events in our lives. He focuses on the more practical issues: saving up to get a place of our own and living happily ever after, as compared to “throwing” money into one big party with no practicality to speak of (now you know why I can marry this guy). Despite understanding his viewpoint, I feel that a wedding is still important (to me), even more so for a gay and interracial couple.

So as you are reading this article, I may have whispered enough in his ears to convince him of a mini wedding ceremony and reception. I may be a semi-closeted gay; I do need to put my head out once in a while to breathe in some fresh air.

Image courtesy of Shutterstock

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June 25, 2014