SimplySxy

Author: Elton Andersyn

  • How to Really Measure Penis Size

    How to Really Measure Penis Size

    Time to whip ’em out, all you penis-bearing humans. Let’s see what you’re packing. No, we’re not going to have a dick-measuring contest. But, we will be measuring. Today, I’m going to present the proper technique for getting the most accurate measurement of a penis. A Google search will generate all sorts of sites that provide simple instructions on how to correctly measure a penis. However, there are differences that should be disregarded. What follows is a distillation of those techniques as edited by me based on personal experiences and observations.

    Step 1: Gather the following items.

    Ruler (or a measuring tape if the penis is obviously greater than a foot long)
    Tailor’s measuring tape AND\OR A length of string

    Step 2: Get Hard

    However you go about it, it’s critical to achieve and maintain a full erection. For this reason, it’s ideal to wait until the penis is as erect as possible before taking measurements. For most, it takes a while for the penis to attain its greatest volume. It also helps to ensure the penis is going to remain stimulated when left unattended. In my case, once I move from stimulation to something as clinical as measuring my penis, I tend to soften up in a hurry.

    Consider masturbating or having some form of penetrative sex for a good five minutes or so before grabbing the ruler. For those with penises that are growers instead of showers, stimulate the penis for as long as you know it takes to fill out completely. Once you know the penis is fully erect, you’re ready to proceed.

    Step 3: Measure for Penis Length

    A little debate exists as to how to measure for penis length, but the most prevalent technique is to lay a ruler lengthwise along the top of the shaft from the base to the tip of the penis. Most agree that the ruler should be pushed into the pubic bone, as fatty tissues can reduce the length of measurement.

    Some contend that penis length should be measured from underneath. With a lot of men, there’s easily an extra half inch or more of length to be had. Some consider this cheating, but my experience provides evidence that measuring from underneath is more accurate. I’ve noted that the extra half inch I find when measuring my penile length from underneath can be the most potent half inch of my penis. However, sexual technique and body types factor in most to this theory.

    For those penises with exaggerated curves—to the left, right, up, or down—use the tailor’s tape or string to measure instead. A ruler will not take an accurate measurement otherwise. Almost all agree that penis length should never be measured from the side. It’s too difficult to get an accurate measurement that way.

    Step 4: Measure for Penis Girth

    The girth of a penis is its circumference. The easiest way to measure for girth is with a tailor’s measuring tape. If you’ve ever been measured for a fitting or had a garment altered, you should be familiar with a tailor’s tape.

    Simply wrap the tailor’s tape around the thickest part of the penis. The point where the tape meets back up with itself will provide the girth of the penis. Use care to ensure that you do not angle the tape as this will result in a greater measurement than is accurate.

    Don’t have a tailor’s tape? Use a piece of string in the same manner, but use your thumb and forefinger to note the point where the string meets back up with itself. While keeping that point marked, straighten the string and measure the distance using the ruler.

    Step 5: Measure for Penis Width

    Not many sites mention measuring for penis width, but this is an important factor to consider and can be the most difficult measurement to discern. The sites that present how to determine the width offer a simple equation that many may remember from school as the formula for determining the diameter of a circle. The circumference of a circle divided by 3.14 (π) equals the diameter of the circle. This approach will work fine for those with a round penis, but many of us don’t have round shafts.

    The top of my shaft is flat with only the slightest taper at the edges, while it is swollen and rounded on the underside. My girth is 5.75 inches. If I divide my girth by 3.14, the width of my penis should be 1.83 inches. This is an incorrect measurement, though, because of how my penis is shaped. Measured with a ruler perpendicularly across the thickest part of my shaft, my width is 2.25 inches. That’s quite a discrepancy from the application of the girth/3.14=width formula.

    Step 6: Repeat, Repeat, Repeat

    Penises are moody. Personally speaking, there are times of the day and times of the month at which I am prone to fuller erections than at others. To gain the most accurate measurements, it’s advisable to repeat the measurement process at least three times. Once in the morning, once around noon, and once in the evening is one such approach. Note the measurements each time, then add them together and divide them by the number of times you measured. This will give you an average that you can use as the final measurement.

    There are reasons beyond machismo to measure a penis. One of the most practical reasons is in order to properly size condoms. Another reason is for the sizing of cock rings or chastity devices. It’s no fun to have to go to a hospital to have those removed when you realized you used an undersized one. Measuring a penis can also be a fun experience to share with a lover. I mean, who doesn’t like someone fiddling with their diddle?

    There you have it. Pretty simple, huh? Armed with a ruler, tailor’s tape, and/or length of string you can ascertain your accurate size. For those with a penis at their disposal, happy measuring.

    Feature image courtesy of Shutterstock
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  • Is sex more enjoyable without condoms?

    Is sex more enjoyable without condoms?

    In the world of penetrative sex, the guiding wisdom follows that safe sex is the best sex. But is sex truly as enjoyable while wearing a prophylactic as when going at it bareback? This contentious issue has resulted in two polarizing camps: those who sing the gospel of suiting up and those who praise the joys of going raw.

    Truth is, though, most reading this post will answer the question with a collective “duh.” Little else compares to the elation one experiences from the unadulterated sensation of a moist velvety smooth vaginal, anal, or oral cavity.  No amount of extra-thin latex can produce the same sensation of going bareback. Still, there are too many risks involved with unprotected sex to outright promote the practice.

    Nonetheless, sex without a condom is more enjoyable. I know it’s not a socially responsible answer to the question, but it is honest. There are circumstances, however, in which sex with a condom can be more enjoyable than while wearing one. For this reason, I contend that the answer to the question is that it all depends.

    Many who promote the use of condoms at all times like to declare that sex is just as enjoyable, if not more so, than unprotected sex. They suggest sexy ways to incorporate condoms into foreplay. These condom proponents will often discuss the many product options available that allow for the same, if not better, sensations as experienced with unprotected sex. I agree that condoms can be incorporated into sex partners’ routines in a way that makes the experience quite enjoyable, but usually that’s due to a state of mind versus the physical sensations.

    For the bulk of my extramarital relations, condoms were total boner killers. However, I  once had a lover who recognized the effect the appearance of a rubber had on me and made it an enjoyable experience. She had oral skills that blew my mind. Within her retinue was the ability to slip a condom on me with her mouth without me ever knowing. We eventually stopped using protection, but the first time she slipped me inside her, I alerted her to the fact that I wasn’t wearing protection. She smiled down at me and challenged my assertion. I reached down past her bottom and felt that I did indeed sport packaged wood, but I never felt it go on. The condom was in place, and I continued to rock an achingly hard erection. The fact that she was able to suit me up so effectively only served to heighten the sensations in that round. During our next round, however, I grabbed a condom and attempted to pop it on. No such luck. I instantly limped. Being aware of the use of the condom killed my boner.

    The start of the relationship with my most recent lover highlights what a difference the mental aspect plays in regards to the enjoyability of sex with a condom. We started out very responsibly. We never played without protection. I wanted to slide inside her bareback at some time in the future but was in no rush to do so. It got to the point that I began to become aroused at the sight of a condom. Condoms equated to tremendous extramarital sex with my lover. I knew it was only a matter of time before we ditched the condom, but it came quicker than I expected. I actually felt disappointed when we stopped using them. My erections even lost their full rigidity until I got a nice pace going. I still wonder why I had a stronger erection with her while using a condom than without. I inevitably came around and enjoyed bareback sex just as much without a condom as with one. But, how very perplexing it was to find sex more enjoyable with a condom. It certainly gives some credence to the condom-use advocates’ position.

    Another group for whom condoms can make sex more enjoyable are the minute men. Here’s a fellow who gets to the point of penetrating his lover, manages a mere half dozen slow thrusts, and then… Pop! Game over. This man is not afforded with a chance to relish the experience and is often left with a feeling of inadequacy. There is a solution: wear a rubber. From my own experience, the staying power that comes from wearing a condom presents an obstacle to me hitting the finish line. For the longest time, I couldn’t cum if I wore a rubber. In this regard and unlike the minute man, this made sex less enjoyable for me. Luckily, I finally found a sweet spot and managed to find fulfillment while wearing protection.

    In addition to often resulting in limpness, I’ve found using condoms also destroys spontaneity. I remember starting out bareback with my first lover after my wife and I opened our marriage. It took about a month before something clicked and she began to require me to wear protection. The thing about this lover and me is that we often engaged each other in random locations, and always on a whim. My cock would be granite, her pussy a lake, and the tip of my penis would be poised right at her entrance. Then everything came screeching to a halt as we scrambled for a rubber. By the time we found one and unpackaged it, the heat had faded. Even once I managed to sheathe my sword, and if it managed to stay fully erect, a good portion of the passion had dissolved and it became merely an action, not a celebratory act.

    Overall, I will likely always find sex more enjoyable without a condom. It ultimately comes down to the preferences of individuals.

    If done correctly and safely, sex with a condom can result in a higher level of intimacy than protected sex. To do so, though, partners must be honest with one another and communicate any hesitations they may have. Also, I highly recommend getting tested prior to entering into a condom-free sex life with your partner(s), with the understanding that testing doesn’t guarantee that you or your partner(s) are free of STIs. Done responsibly, scrapping the condom and going in bare is one of the most enjoyable feelings we as human beings can experience.

    Image courtesy of Shutterstock
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