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How To Explore Spanking & Discipline (Part 2)


How To Explore Spanking & Discipline (Part 2)

We continue our Mistress Iceni feature on exploring spanking and discipline here!

What Goes On In A Session & Favorite Props To Use

First of all we decide pre-session if we will start on arrival or sit and have a chat first for you to settle in. Some role plays will begin at the front door, which can be thrilling – you have arrived home at your Aunt’s house to find her very annoyed about something/you are visiting your bossy new neighbour who suspects you have been peeping on her and have stolen her underwear from the washing line/you are reporting to the headmistress’ study after school for detention and so on.

In these cases, you will be led through to the study and usually given a thorough scolding and interrogation about your behaviour. I like to start my sessions with an over the knee hand spanking to warm up the bottom. This is a good way to forge a connection across my knee before we proceed, and to reduce any resistance: once the pants come down, so does the attitude, I find. Then we would move on to a variety of positions – over the school desk, lying face down on the red leather sofa, touching your toes, strapped to the Eton Flogging Block and so on, and I would use several of my implements.

My spanking sessions can be relentless, but I will also give you regular breaks maybe in corner time, holding a stress position, hands on your head and pants round your knees. If it is a scholastic/Governess/home tutor session I would incorporate tasks like writing lines/essays/prepare a presentation/memory tasks/tests. I absolutely love scolding so often I will scold you throughout and verbally tease you. I like some interaction and cheekiness, but some people are quiet and compliant all the way through which is also fine. 

I like to end my session with an OTK spanking as well, to complete the circle, and depending on the visitor/scenario, will encourage the spankee to relax across my knee for a little while specially if it has been an intense session. Then I would offer a cup of tea or coffee and sit and chat for a while, making sure they do not leave until they are fully recovered!

With regards to props, the devil is in the detail. I ask a lot of questions before the booking and mull over the scene in advance so I can get creative. For example, I had a session booking where he wanted to be spanked for stealing sweets from the corner shop when he was a lad, something he got away with at the time. So I bought some old-fashioned-looking sweets and put them on the chair in the study. When I opened the door and took him through as his Aunt, claiming I had searched his bag after a phone call from the newsagents and discovered his stolen stash, he saw the sweets, gasped and turned pale and started trembling!

It was wonderful and a very powerful indication that just one or two appropriate props can really help with authenticity. He hadn’t expected to see that, and afterwards he said they looked just like the sweets he had stolen, and seeing them jolted him right back to being that young boy feeling the guilt of having done it. A perfect way to get into the right headspace! 

Other props I love are my retro 70s phone with round dial and curly wiring, so I can call parents/authorities/the school.  My custom-made Eton Flogging Block is a formidable piece of furniture that’s been nick-named ‘the Beast’ and is very intimidating. I am very fetishistic about items and implements so I could tell you about many more props, but there wouldn’t be time to cover them all!

What Should One Knew To Spanking & Discipline Prepare For Prior To Their First Session?

Firstly, do your research regarding who you visit. If you wish to experience purely a discipline/spanking session, I’d advise visiting a disciplinarian rather than a mistress (who would probably be good at it, but also does many other things, and does not specialise in this area). A disciplinarian/spanker solely focuses on this area and will have more experience and nuance.

Also research where they work from – do you want a domestic environment or a dungeon? Look at their online presence – things like Twitter, webpage, reviews, clips (so you can see how they work). Depending on location, people charge different rates so maybe you can find cut-price sessions that undercut some of the others, but you get what you pay for in life. 

Approach with a polite and informative email, and communicate as much as possible before the session (not mailing 10 times a day! But it’s best to be clear before you start about details/background etc).

Consider whether you need a safe word or not. Remember ‘I can take a hard spanking’ is very subjective. You may imagine you have a huge tolerance for pain but not be able to handle what you thought you might. Or you may be too cautious and find once you get going, you love it and could take harder. So bear in mind if you think it might get too much, you can request a safe word before the session. 

A great spanking session is about connection. The most important thing is to feel the right connection with this person in your initial contacts. It is about trust and instinct. 

Don’t be late! If you’re running late, inform her/him. Follow reconfirmation instructions to the letter. This shows attention the detail and a level of respect.

Arrive clean and tidy, above all clean. We are dealing with your bottom – need I say more? Nice underwear is also much appreciated. Often you may bring a gift if you like but it’s not compulsory. If you do choose to turn up with flowers/chocolates/a bottle of wine etc you will probably be remembered as very thoughtful and considerate. 

Be prepared if it’s your first time – the effect of discipline may not be what you expect. Some people can experience strong emotions during a spanking as it can bring up unexpected repressed emotions. It might make you feel rampantly horny!

Equally, it may send you into sub-space where you feel floaty, serene and peaceful. You can become quite discombobulated – forget your wallet or pick up the wrong pair of glasses, or try to leave via the boiler cupboard (all of these have happened after my sessions!) so make sure you have gathered yourself and your faculties before leaving. 

Mostly know this – it might be an intense experience, and some of it may be painful, but if you have been thinking about getting a thrashing for some time, and are not sure whether to try it, I’d say if it’s often on your mind then it is for you, and it will be a liberating experience and the start of a whole new chapter to your life.

You are never too old to go across my knee either – I have one lovely visitor who is 85 and took his first spanking at 75. It’s never too late to start this journey. But be warned – once you pop, you can’t stop! 

Mistress Iceni – London-based disciplinarian specialising in spanking and role plays with a distinctly vintage style. I may remind you of your old school-teacher, Mum’s friend, strict neighbour or Governess, but whichever female authority figure I represent for you, a visit to my study will usually result in a sore bottom and a marked improvement in your behaviour. I am a firm believer in old-fashioned discipline and you will find it may hurt at the time, but it is ultimately for your own good. 

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Twitter: @Mistress_Iceni

Clips4Sale Clips store ‘At Home with Miss Iceni:

Upcoming projects to promote:

I am currently working on several projects to collaborate more with women as I have enjoyed filming so much with Anty (@Anty851 on Twitter, follow her, she’s wonderful) and Ana, and before that, the wonderful films for Miss Elsa Svenson ( as Miss Ashbrook. I am planning to film some clips and content with a lovely young lady Dilan (@OhdearDilan on Twitter- you really should follow her too) Also I have Emily Jane now available to join me in sessions and film with me as a spankee. I’m currently in discussions with another lovely young lady to offer exclusive custom clips as mother and daughter. So watch this space and follow me on social media if you want to see me spanking some pretty bottoms!

My other project which I worked on extensively during lockdown is my retro spanking novel: Set in 1979 in provincial England, it’s the story of Andrew, a permanently horny 17 year old who is sent to live with his strict Aunt while his parents divorce. She takes him on a roller-coaster journey of discovery with help from her equally assertive lady friends. It is a coming-of-age story that examines self-acceptance, kink-shaming, gender identity, spanking, age play, petticoat punishment and the psychological and emotional pull of corporal punishment. I have pitched it somewhere between ‘Harriet Marwood, Governess’ (which was a huge inspiration, and this is a kind of updated homage) and the saucy ‘Carry On’ Films of the 1970s. The working title is ‘Aunty knows best’ and I have just finished the first draft, so while it is not available just yet, I will promote it as soon as I have it ready for my eager readers! The plan is to publish as a paperback, e-book and possible audio version, narrated by myself.

Images courtesy of Mistress Iceni

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Mistress Iceni

London-based disciplinarian specialising in spanking and role plays with a distinctly vintage style. I may remind you of your old school-teacher, Mum’s friend, strict neighbour or Governess, but whichever female authority figure I represent for you, a visit to my study will usually result in a sore bottom and a marked improvement in your behaviour. I am a firm believer in old-fashioned discipline and you will find it may hurt at the time, but it is ultimately for your own good.


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