Tag: Pornography

When Erotica Meets The Internet: How Technology Has Changed Pornography

The term “pornography” is often a vague way to describe representation of sexual behavior in books, media, art, and movies that evokes sexual stimulation. It has gained the reputation as being naughty, illicit, and has even been condemned by many cultural and religious groups. Another term we often hear is “erotica”, the more acceptable and tolerated version of pornography. The difference between the two is subjective and varies based on where you are and whom you ask. The history of pornography traces back long before we had the Internet and smartphones. It has been around since humans began to communicate through art, literature, and cultural symbols of sexual imagery and erotica. Pornography has been a worldwide phenomenon since the ancient Greek and Romans, Hindus, Japanese, Egyptians and even during the Victorian era in Great Britain.

The origin of pornography goes as far back as ancient cave drawings depicting sexual and erotic imagery. Different cultures around the world have historical depictions of erotica that can be seen as sacred, religious and artistic and to others, perverse and inappropriate. As technology has advanced, so has the access and distribution of pornography. The invention of the printing press led to a surge of pornographic material to the masses including magazines, newspapers, and picture books. The Internet launched in 1991 when there were fewer than 90 published adult pornographic magazines. By the year 1997, there were over 900 pornography websites on the web. Current statistics show that there are now 2.5 million pornography websites available on the Internet. People have always been fascinated with sexuality. Sex is everywhere and only a click away using the latest technology, allowing viewers to browse in private, anonymously and without shame.

The argument in today’s culture is how pornography impacts our sexuality and that technology has changed the landscape of pornographic material. As technology advances, we have more access to pornography and research has yet to conclude if it has a negative impact. Some believe that pornographic material can actually help alleviate sexual repression and create a sense of sexual enlightenment. Others believe that the widespread access of pornographic material is corruptive, dangerous and leads to sexual addiction, infidelity, and sex crimes. Pornography has been controversial due to religion and politics, which attempt to regulate the impact of sexual material on society by influencing how we think about pornography in regards to our sexual values and beliefs. The impact of technology is rapidly changing our sex lives. It has changed how we communicate and our sexual behavior. Humans are fascinated by sexual stimuli and pornography has been an outlet for exploration and entertainment. But how has the Internet changed pornography? Technology has been a powerful source of promotion for sexual material and since the birth of the Internet, it has created a fast-growing billion dollar industry that dominates the world wide web.

The appeal of the Internet is the anonymity, affordability, and accessibility of the content. Other than website history, there is no traceable activity which makes browsing and exploring different aspects of sexuality private. Pornography is believed to be a dominantly male interest; but growing numbers of women are using the Internet to explore sexual desires. It has become a routine part of culture in both Eastern and Western parts of the world. The average person does not have to interact with others to obtain erotica. Women who were too embarrassed to browse the video section at a local adult store can now search pornography from the comfort of their own home. Popular sites like PornHub provide enough erotic material to satisfy a variety of sexual curiosities. The general rule is, that if you can imagine it, there is most likely pornographic material of the same accessible on the Internet. The vast amount of pornographic material that is available on the Internet brings up the question of how our erotic interests and desires are shaped. Neuroscience, sex research, and Internet data have all looked at the impact of pornography on human desire. We need to understand the origin of sexual interests to see the correlation. There has to be an impulse that activates the search for a fantasy, image, or search term. Our programming for desire is influenced by social stimuli. This programming varies for men and women. It is a known fact that men are more visually stimulated while women are looking for stimulation through emotions. The Internet provides that stimuli whether it be images for men or stories for women. As technology develops further, it caters to the diversity and science of human sexual desire. Our brains are programmed to sample our cultural environment. This can include messages by parents, teachers, friends, and the media. Our desires are then set according to these social inputs. Since our cultural environment is changing towards online interaction and technology, so are desire programming, sexual interests, and curiosities.

Pornography fascinates the average person and influences our sexual response and programming for desire. Whether or not there is scientific basis or facts, it will continue to be a topic of social and political protest. For some individuals, it can be a way to engage sexual exploration and an opportunity to become sexually awakened by learning to express oneself as a sexual being and to develop a sense of understanding around sexual values and needs. It can help an individual or couples learn about personal desire and turn-ons by being exposed to different forms of sexual stimuli. Many sex therapists will prescribe pornography or erotica to help clients engage in sexual interests and grow towards sexual awareness. Different types of pornographic material can evoke an emotional response whether be it sexual arousal or disgust. These emotions can help the therapist understand a client’s sexual programming and better provide tools and resources for sexual concerns. The political agenda disagrees with the positive aspects of pornography as a teaching tool and believes that it commercializes sex and causes more corruption, sex crimes, and negative behavior rather than good. There is no conclusion that a simple exposure to online pornography will negatively sexualize our society any more than other forms of media. Like any form of media, moderation is important and understanding the impact can help reduce impulsivity, compulsivity and out of control sexual behavior. As a society, we must acknowledge that pornography is here to stay and understand how we can create awareness around how technology has changed pornography and how the Internet is changing our sexual relationships.

Images courtesy of Shutterstock

Tomorrow, SimplySxy introduces Cindy Starfall, the asian sensation as our exclusive interview continues!

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May 2, 2014
Porn Valley’s Goldstar Lesbian Lily Cade Speaks Out

Lily Cade, porn valley’s goldstar lesbian and AVN Best All-Girl Performer nominee 2014, shares with SimplySxy her views on pornography, porn addiction and her favourite sex toy she can’t do without.

SimplySxy: What is your personal view on pornography?

Lily Cade: I love making porn. I’m a performer and a director and I find this job fulfilling on so many levels. I love the athletic, high energy sex. I love being able to inhabit a character that isn’t myself and embody her through a sex scene. I love knowing that everyone is on the same page – that we are all on set to make a product and to make it good. For me this is an expression of my creativity and an expression of my authenticity as a sexual being.

There’s a dark side to the porn industry, and it’s that a lot of people get into it not because this work really speaks to them but because they mistakenly think it’s a super lucrative profession or just kind of don’t know what they are getting themselves into. There are doors closed with all of our life choices, but porn closes some pretty big ones (teaching being a prime example – we see a lot of “ex-porn star teacher fired” type stories). If you do this job because you like it and you’re proud of it, someone bringing it up can’t hurt you…but if porn is the record of you making life decisions you regret, it can be used as a weapon against you. Girls ask me all the time about getting into porn, and I tell them what is good and what is bad about it and a lot of times they change their minds about doing it. This job really isn’t for everyone.

SimplySxy: What were some of the challenges which you faced when you started out in the industry?

Lily: I’m a bit of an unconventional porn star. I have short hair, I’m sort of butch (I call myself “Hollywood Butch” as in “I’m not one, but I play one on TV”), I do girl/girl porn exclusively because I’m gay and not as a stepping stone to boy/girl and larger stardom. I just f**k girls like I mean it.

When I first got into porn, I had a lot of producers and agents tell me that I wasn’t going to be successful, particularly if I wasn’t willing to f**k men on camera. I just decided to represent myself, and I feel that I’ve accomplished a lot. I have my own website LilyCade.com, I’ve directed movies that have been nominated for AVN awards, I’ve won two Feminist Porn Awards, and I was up for Best All Girl Performer at the AVN Awards last year. I’ve shot hundreds of scenes and I’m still going strong.

I did make some changes to my look for porn. I was really rough around the edges when I got in, but I like being able to be more versatile. I’ll always have shorter hair, but I can rock an evening gown or a masculine suit depending on what the role calls for. I learned everything I know about doing makeup after I got into porn – before porn I’d basically only worn it for Halloween. I’ve grown a lot as a performer and as an actress.

SimplySxy: What are your views regarding pornography addiction?

Lily: Pornography isn’t technically addictive, although certainly there are people who become obsessed with it. I think any activity that you’re doing in lieu of human interaction can be a problem, whether that’s looking at porn or playing World of WarCraft or just watching television all day. For some people, porn can be a really positive thing, as a masturbation aid or as an educational tool or as something to spice up partnered sex. It’s about balance. If your entire life is watching porn, that’s not great, but we’re talking about adults here. I don’t feel that as a media creator I’m responsible for policing people’s media consumption or judging their lives.

SimplySxy: Please share with us one tip for ladies to enjoy anal sex?

Lily: If your definition of “anal sex” is someone’s dick in your ass, then you probably need to work up to it. Rimming feels good to a lot of girls (although I’ve met chicks who hate it – humans have varied sexual tastes), so do toys like buttplugs. If you approach anal like it’s a thing you’re trying to accomplish instead of approaching your ass as yet another conduit to pleasure, you’re doing it wrong. Your ass has nerves in it. Explore them and figure out what feels good to you.

Anal hygiene is important too. It’s way easier to relax around anal sex if you’re not worried about “santorum”. Us porn girls are well acquainted with enemas.

SimplySxy: What is the ultimate role play for you?

Lily: I like cops, prison guards, anyone in a uniform. I like playing with this particular sort of power and the abuse thereof. These sorts of authority figures are part of a system that’s f**ked. Our prison system is just massively inequitable, but the uniforms are hot, and that power to f**k up your life is hot, and there’s something taboo about being drawn to something dangerous.

I’ve done a lot of scenes where I’ve played a dirty cop and drawn attention to things that are unfair about the system while still doing really hot sex scenes so you get a touch of this “wrong but hot.”

SimplySxy: Which do you think is the sexiest part of a men’s body?

Lily: Oh honey. I’m the wrong gal to ask. His money, I suppose, since I’m just not at all interested in men sexually. I’ve never even kissed a boy .

SimplySxy: What is your favourite sex toy?

Lily: My strap-on. I’m good with it, and I know how to give angles and do all the porno positions – picking girls up, pile-drivers, you catch my drift. I like being able to f**k girls really hard, which I can also do with my hands, and I like the athleticism of it. I think a lot of dildo use in porn scenes can be kind of disconnected – less using something to f**k each other and more using it to avoid having to have sex with one’s scene partner – but when I have my strap-on buried in some girl and I’m kissing her at the same time she’s definitely there with me.

Also, a lot of the girls I f**k are kind of straight. My energy is kind of masculine. I’m a creature of the borderlands and a lot of girls who aren’t into girly girls are into me. So the strap-on thing works for me.

SimplySxy: Share with us one secret to spice it up in bed with a lover?

Lily: Let go of your hangups. You have one life, and it’s dumb to be afraid of being honest about what you like and who you are. Just be honest about your desires, both to yourself and to your partners.

Also monogamy is insane. There is so much that you can learn from other people that limiting yourself to one person sexually is just a very silly choice, on the level of deciding to have only one friend. Jealousy is a stupid emotion. It’s so, so stupid. I feel it too, but objectively it’s never brought anything of value, and I know better than to let it rule my life.

SimplySxy: What defines a sexy man according to you?

Lily: I’m going to refer to question 6, and then answer this for woman.

I’ve always said that my type is an energy thing. I f**k a lot of really attractive women (porn star perks, guys, porn star perks…seriously this job is a f**king thrill ride) with a variety of looks. I am not attracted to overweight women – I’ve always had to work hard to keep my own weight down, and it’s something I don’t like about myself, and it’s something that I just can’t cannot connect with erotically – but short of that I’m pretty open-minded.

I’ve had mind-blowing sex with women that I wouldn’t look at a picture of and be aroused by but whose energy turned me on in person. When a girl is into me, and I can feel her desire for me, that’s hot. Or if she’s nervous but ready, that’s hot too. I love butches and femmes and black women and white women – as long as she’s down, and game, and likes herself and likes sex.

SimplySxy: In your opinion, what can a guy do to give a girl a mind-blowing orgasm?

Lily: What sex means to me is rocking my partner’s world. I’m a service top – I’ll run the show, but you’re the star. I’ve never actually had an orgasm from masturbation, but I have had them from being so turned on by my partner’s pleasure or carried away by being connected with her. My sexuality is just profoundly other-focused.

I don’t think that most people operate this way, but if you can channel that it goes a long way. Learn her body. Pay attention to her. The same moves do not work on every girl, although there is sort of a basic set of stuff to choose from. I would say that the key to being a really good f**k is communication, both verbally and intuitively.

I have a leg up on dudes, because I know what the stuff I’m doing to her feels like. I can put my fingers in a girl and have this sense memory of what that feels like to me. I know her spots because I have them too. Yet, everyone is different, and plenty of women like things I don’t like..so you can learn to understand women too. You just need to listen to them with all five of your senses .

SimplySxy: A last message from you to all your fans and the SimplySxy readers?

Lily: I love my fans. I’m not a typical porn star, and I don’t want to be. I’m assertive and opinionated and I don’t do bullshit and I love that my fans support me in expressing my real self. I’m an entertainer, and an entertainer needs an audience. When people tell me that my work has affected them it means a lot to me.

If you like the things I’ve said, and you’d like to see me in action, check out my website LilyCade.com or follow me on twitter at @lily_cade

Images courtesy of Lily Cade

Come back here for tomorrow’s article on Internet and Pornography by Dr Shannon Chavez.

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May 1, 2014
Meet Meiko Askara, the new Porn Princess

SimplySxy presents its Pornography Special Feature 2014. We are delighted to present Meiko Askara, dubbed the new Porn Princess, as the first interview in this series. Meiko shares with us a secret to spice it up in bed and we get her opinion on the age old question, does size really matter?

Meiko Askara: First off Thank you for this wonderful opportunity and interview. My name is Meiko and I’m a 18yr. old mixed raced Japanese/Taiwanese budding starlet who entered into the Adult industry pretty much out of High School since turning 18 back in October 2013. I am currently a college student and grew up in Northern California living a very normal family and social life. I’ve always wanted to be a performer in Adult film as I am a very sexual person but wasn’t sure how to go about it. I made contact with someone who was familiar with the Adult Film industry who was able to steer me in the right direction with their Adult industry connections. I’m normally a very quiet person in everyday life who likes to garden and paint on my free time but a little wild in the bedroom. My First scene was with Kink.com a famous BDSM fetish site. It was a Hardcore Four guy Gang-Bang with double penetration and anal. I shot with some of the Pro’s in the biz. I shot that scene in I think in December 2013.

SimplySxy: Where do you feel the current direction of the adult industry is heading towards?

Meiko: The Adult industry has for the most part, for years been based on the business model for adult entertainment performers where Agents are contacted by producers of various sites and niches and our business arrangements are handled by our agents. We could elect not to do the scene but do not have much control of the content that is being shot or the pricing structure for the various scenes in which we are being asked to perform in. A current trend is one where the Adult Performer is in charge of his or her own destiny. Where we determine our own pricing structure and have more control of the content of our scene based on the consumers fantasies and using our Fan’s script as the base to develop the scene to be shot. The business is about being personal, not necessarily producing pre-scripted scenes from big production companies. Social media such as twitter helps facilitate dialogue between performers and fans, and helps us promote our own ventures where the Fan is the director. Such sites such as Clips For Sale and Customs4U are good examples of this business model. Many of us are now doing webcam appearances and creating our own content and custom videos from the comfort of our own homes where there is a close symbiotic relationship between the Adult Performer and the fan directly. Scripted content from big production companies will not be going anywhere anytime soon but there is definitely a new trend occurring in the industry for a more personalized experience for the consumer of Porn.

SimplySxy: What are some of the misconceptions people have about the adult industry?

Meiko: I guess one of the biggest misconceptions is how long a porn shoot actually takes even for a 5-10 minute scene. Between make-up, wardrobe and the crew setting up equipment it can be an all day affair. It’s a lot of work. Another misconception is that just because a male or female talent does Porn, it is assumed we also do escorting on the side. While some girls in the industry do escort on the side, most of us strictly keep our sexual encounters private or perform in a very regulated professional environment. I might add that the industry is very regulated with mandatory 14 day STD/HIV testing and production companies will not shoot us and performers will not perform with someone who does not have a current test. The industry as a whole is actually in some aspects safer than the one night stand that some members of the general public engages in. The industry takes a bad rap every time an HIV scare occurs. It becomes a media circus and all the anti-porn crusaders point to the industry as a cause of sexually transmitted diseases when the opposite is actually the case when the hard numbers and facts are actually analyzed, it will show that HIV outbreaks are actually quite rare when compared to the number of outbreaks in the general public.

SimplySxy: Can you share with us one funny/awkward/embarrassing moment that have happened on set?

Meiko: To be quite frank, anal scenes where the performer has not taken the proper preparatory measures can lead to an embarrassing moment where shooting needs to stop and the talent needs to “Clean Up “. The embarrassment is minimal as everyone in the industry is very professional and when an accident does occur, it’s a brief interruption and then the scene continues.

SimplySxy: Were you nervous when you made your debut porno?

Meiko: Actually ……NO. It came too natural for me. Not sure if that’s a good trait. Haha

SimplySxy: Where is your favourite filming location/scene?

Meiko: I really enjoyed my first scene with kink.com. It was a four guy hardcore gangbang. It allowed me to test my limits in a sexual manner while being in an environment that was completely safe. I got to shoot in a beautiful mansion in the Hills down in Southern California with some very good looking male talent. I had a blast.

May 1, 2014
Vaccinate your Teenager against Unwanted Pregnancy and Sexually Transmitted Diseases

With internet pornography and lack of healthy sexuality, a growing number of teens and young adults get most of their sex education from watching Pornography.

As a parent would you like your child to learn about sex from other teenagers?

Parents can now vaccinate their children against unwanted pregnancy and sexually transmitted disease with information!

What makes this such a problem in Singapore is the generation gap between traditional views of sex on one side and the availability of pornography to teenagers on the other side.

Parents are not comfortable talking openly about sex with their children and by the time the kids turn into teenagers, they have gotten most of their information from other teenagers or internet porn and not from mom or dad.

“A survey was conducted in Singapore about the growing number of teenagers having unsafe sex. The survey stated that because of a lack of knowledge among young people it could lead to dangerous behaviour that puts them at risk of unplanned pregnancies and sexually transmitted infections. The incidence of sexually transmitted infections among teens rose from 238 cases in 2002 to 787 last year.”

Parents need to learn how to talk to their children about sex when they are young, starting out with age appropriate materials done in a positive way. The biggest challenge that most parents have is their own embarrassment with talking about sex. One way to combat this embarrassment is to view it as knowledge that will vaccinate their children against unplanned pregnancies and sexually transmitted diseases that could save their lives.

Knowledge is power, and the more positive information that children learn about their own bodies, then they are less curious about searching for information that can be damaging or dangerous leading to unsafe sex. Not talking about healthy sexuality or shaming a child for talking about sex is the most dangerous message that a parent can give to their child and teenagers!

The process starts when a child is younger and curious about their own bodies, a parents’ feedback is crucial. Never put negative connotations on a child’s body, use correct terminology, and call a penis a penis or a vagina a vagina. When a parent sees a child touch themselves, don’t shame them, but understand that they don’t know the difference between scratching their arm or touching their penis/vagina. Telling them to stop or saying something negative is only going to shame them or make them feel bad about their body.

As children turn into teenagers, talk to them about sex, to respect their own bodies and if they have sexual urges to masturbate, it is the safest form of sex on the planet. Talk to them about contraception, sexually transmitted diseases. Explain to teenagers that touching, hugging and kissing can be fun, but that it does not have to lead to sex, and saying no is alright and if they say yes, to use a condom. Prepare them for war and give then the armour that they need to survive!

Parents have the belief that if they talk about sex with their kids, then they are telling them that it is alright to have it, and by not talking to them about it means they won’t have it…..WRONG!

With that belief, a parent has just sent his/her child out into the world naked, not prepared and will most likely end up being a victim of an early sexual encounter, learning about sex from other teens and porn. Those are the teens that have the highest incidence of unwanted pregnancy or sexually transmitted disease!

Vaccinate your child with knowledge about healthy sexuality, the odds are that your child will not be among the odds but safe!

March 19, 2014