SimplySxy

Tag: kink

  • HongKong Kink Con 2014 – Presenter Bios

    HongKong Kink Con 2014 – Presenter Bios

    With just slightly under 2 weeks to go before HK Kink Con 2014, SimplySxy is delighted to share with you all the 11 bios of the presenters who will be there from 14-16 February.  Read on to find out more about them!

    Morpheus – lordmorpheus.com

    Morpheous (Hons B.A., B.Ed) is a sex educator/author and magazine/kinkyTV/radio consultant based in Toronto, Canada. His Education Series presents a variety of lectures to both graduate and undergraduate studies including: The U of T Sexual Diversity Studies inaugural lecture series in 2008, York University Alternative Sexuality Student Union, Washington University, Missouri, Wayne State and the University of Western Ontario and many others. He travels and presents across the Americas, Europe, and Asia, doing outreach to both academic and positive safer sex organizations. This is his second year presenting at HKKC.

    He is the author of two books “How to be Kinky: A Beginner’s Guide to BDSM” (August 2008 Green Candy Press, San Francisco) and the followup, “How to be Kinkier: Your Guide to Safer BDSM“ (Green Candy Press, San Francisco – release date: spring 2012.)  His work is archived at the Sexual Representation Collection at the Bonham Centre for Sexual Diversity Studies at the University of Toronto, the Leather Archives of Chicago and the National Archives of Canada.

    Every year he hosts the world’s largest single night public erotic Japanese rope bondage event during Nuit Blanche in Toronto, Canada since 2006.

    Mistress Anna – mistressanna.info

    Mistress Anna has been a part of the Adult Industry for approximately 10 years and the last 3.5 years has seen her evolve in to Domination. She is self employed as a Pro Domme as well as being a qualified Personal Trainer and Beauty Therapist, which she has incorporated nicely into the mix via her Bootcamp Mistress/Forced Fitness and Body Maintenance for slaves courses.

    She enjoys role playing an Angry Wife, Sadistic Nurse or Head Mistress mixed in with Corporal Punishment, especially O.T.K Spankings, Ball Busting, Cross Dressing, Water Sports, Anal play, Urethral Sounds, Rope and Temporary Piercing.

    In the community, she leads the Sydney Dommes and subs Munch, and has presented at UBER and Sydney Leather Pride. She is “Rope Mistress” to CJ Blue and is being Served by Chastised Loser.

    Decima

    Decima trained and practiced as a teacher of Drama and Theatre Arts and has been involved in theatre and music most of her life. On retirement from teaching she opened HK’s first BDSM commercial dungeon which served as a meeting point for the community in Hong Kong for many years. Fetish Fashion welcomed many people from around the world who were on their own journey of discovery and provided a safe place to learn and share.

    Decima worked closely with Cross Dressers and provided counselling for many people in the community who wanted better understanding of their sexuality. Her arrest and subsequent trial served only to make her more determined to educate those who wished to understand the BDSM lifestyle.

    As a presenter her experience includes the World Sexology Conference in Singapore and in Hong Kong, and HKKC 1, where her workshop was rated the top workshop of the conference by conference goers. She also lectured for some years in Sexual and Gender Diversity at the University of Hong Kong. She is active in the BDSM community in Hong Kong, and Sydney, Australia on her frequent visits there.

    At the moment Decima is completing her formal training in counselling and psychotherapy and looks forward to using her decades of experience in the BDSM community to help those of minority sexuality who look for reassurance and understanding.

    Elle – MBE2013.com

    Elle has been involved in the BDSM community for about 14 years. In that time, she’s enjoyed bringing her expertise in human anatomy and physiology and her experience in rope, service and D/S to the community through teaching workshops and consulting for various print publications. For the past 3 years she has had the honour of lecturing on the subject of BDSM at the University level alongside her long-time friend and mentor, Morpheous. Elle has a personal passion for M/s, service, objectification, rope, power exchange, ceremony, protocol, ritual and boot worship. She is also the Producer and Director of the world’s largest single night Rope Bondage Exhibition, known as “MBE” which invites hundreds of rope enthusiasts from all over the world to perform in front of thousands of viewers in person and online each year.

    Allura

    Allura has been talking about sex since she learned to speak. After attending Carleton University for gender and sexuality studies, she went on the explore the sex industry firsthand for 3 years. She has worked in harm reduction and outreach for sex workers as well as other high risk groups. She is currently teaching and travelling the world.

    Brian

    Brian has been in the lifestyle for 17 years, and active in the community for 6 years. As one of the community leaders in HK, Brian is the founder and director of HKKC, and helps run the Sunday Munch. He is married to his sub, EmJ, and they have been in a 24/7 relationship for 4 years. He has a fetish for sensory deprivation, as well as the psychology behind D/s. In his professional life, he is an educator, event planner, and founder of HKKC.

    Brian made his debut as a presenter at HKKC 1 with 3 workshops, and he has assisted in 4 lectures at HKU in 2013.

    Milla Reika – milla-reika.tumblr.com

    Milla Reika first began her career as a Mistress/Kinbaku Rope Artist in 2010 in Osaka, Japan. From 2011, Milla moved her career to the stage where she now performs regularly at Kinbaku/SM Events throughout Osaka and Tokyo.

    In 2012, following the retirement of her Master, Takamine Ren, Milla took on management of Matrix SM bar on her own, as well as starting up [Nymphetamine] SM and Fetish Events.

    In addition to Kinbaku based performances, Milla also extends her arena into Body Suspension, Body Modification/Piercing and SM shows involving torture and interrogation.

    Nuit de Tokyo

    NdT as he is commonly known as, is returning for his second HKKC. HK’s resident rope expert started reading Sade at 13, borrowing from the paternal library, and never really got out of SM since, courtesy of a very submissive first girl friend. In 2003, he moved to Japan and formally studied Japanese rope in situ with Osada Steve (2005-2011), Yukimura Haruki (2008-…) and Nawashi Kanna (2010-…).
    He is a full member and licensed instructor of the Yukimura Haruki Ryuu under the name Haru Kakeru and was assistant to Yukimura Haruki during two workshops in Copenhagen and Los Angeles in 2012.

    In March 2013, he performed recently in Tokyo for the 10th anniversary of The Gate, a large fetish party, and at the Deluxe Kabukicho Theater in Shinjuku as part of the Oo Nawa Asobi series of shows in April 2013.

    Domaignes

    Domaignes is a life long kinkster with much knowledge and experience of BDSM. He lives his lifestyle 24/7 usually with a slave, and always with a dungeon. He is fascinated by the mental and aesthetic appeal of BDSM and has a large collection of toys, implements, furniture, art, sculpture, books, clothing, whips and machines much of which is purpose made.

    Domaignes is one of the community leaders in HK, and is teaching for his second time at HKKC.

    Transhuman

    Transhuman stepped into his first play party 10 years ago and has been dabbling in all things kinky since. Previously active in the NZ scene but now based in HK, he has been a local community leader for the last few years.

    At HKKC 1 Transhuman presented the Skin Deep Play Piercing workshop and has guest lectured at HKU on BDSM and sexuality. Besides SM, Transhuman also has long term ambitions in improving sex education in Hong Kong.

    EmJ – EmJ Photography

    EmJ has been involved in the Canadian and Hong Kong scenes for 12 years. In 2008, she co-created FetLife, the world’s largest adult social networking site. Geared towards the fetish and kink communities, the site is getting ready to celebrate it’s 3 millionth member. In her professional life, Emily is an educator and a professional photographer. She has worked for high-end studios doing portrait work, but her true love is erotic photography.

    EmJ is looking at pursuing a career is sexual heath and therapy, and in doing so she has Guest Lectured at HKU 3 times in 2013, and assisted with a 4th presentation, all of which were in bdsm.

  • Book Review – Dark Warrior by Julie Shelton

    Book Review – Dark Warrior by Julie Shelton

    Amidst the warring times of 14th-century England, Julie Shelton spins a most exquisite tale of passion, vengeance and a forbidden love that best encapsulates the power struggles and lusty fervour that one can only yearn for in fourteenth-century England.

    Ms. Julie starts out on a morbid and harrowing note with Dark Warrior, with the ravaged and battered protagonist hiding the woods.  By the time her rescuers—Nicholas Herron and Rolf Torgesson—learn of her true identity and that her attacker is none other  than her betrothed the tyrant Robert Walford, the impending tragedy has already set itself in stone as the ravishing red-headed beauty has fallen deeply in love with them and they with her.

    Julie weaves a novel of pure raw emotion set in Berwick Castle and creates realistic characters of intensity that will resonate with avid readers of fantasy taboo tales.  This is definitely a page-turner as readers are drawn into the world of Kathryn, Nicholas and Togesson as they redefine the boundaries of seduction, sensuality, and shared ecstasy.

    Dark Warrior will be released on January 15th 2014.  You can purchase it at www.bookstrand.com/dark-warrior.  For more information on Julie and her books, you can visit her website at http://www.juliesheltonauthor.com

  • Emotional Responses in Cuckold Relationships

    Emotional Responses in Cuckold Relationships

    The emotions in cuckold relationships are usually complex and can be at times intense.  In order to prevent problems, both the man and woman need to learn to first carefully consider their emotions and discuss things prior to doing anything and on a regular basis as they immerse themselves in this special lifestyle.

    The woman must reconcile her societal conditioning.  Most women have been raised to be “good girls”, meaning they were expected to suppress their sexuality and enjoyment of sexual pleasures.  The cuckold should make it clear to the woman that he accepts and supports the sensual and sexual pleasure she enjoys outside their relationship while he remains faithful to her.  This is important for most women so they do not feel the guilt associated with what they would normally perceive as infidelity, and so they can fully enjoy their sexual freedom.  In some cases, special consideration must be given to help the woman overcome her good-girl conditioning.

    Virtually all cuckold men experience a varied set of emotions that often leaves them feeling conflicted about their situation.  Many men bounce between several different emotional states as they ponder their situation – arousal, fear, guilt, humiliation, jealousy, regret, shame, submissiveness.  This is one reason that couples should not rush into doing anything.  The novice cuckold needs time to adjust emotionally to his conflicted feelings.

    This rich set of emotions the man experiences is known as “cuckold angst” which many men actually learn to appreciate.  For other men, special consideration is needed to help them overcome the negative emotions they experience.   It is important to recognize the important role a modern cuckold can have in a woman’s life. He can be her life mate, helper, confidante and servant.  His most valuable trait is his willingness to support the woman emotionally, sexually and sensually in addition to being faithful to he while she enjoys her sexual freedom.  To most, he appears to be a typical husband/boyfriend but to her he is an invaluable part of her life.

    In the next installment I will review some key lifestyle terminology and cuckold sub-categories.

  • Spank Me Again Please

    Spank Me Again Please

    My husband has the delightfully annoying habit of spanking one cheek and then walking away.  He knows I love symmetry and that I will chase ‘Him’ around the house positioning my fanny for him to spank the other cheek.  It’s annoying because my body is craving a little more sensual satisfaction and it’s fun that I have to go and ask for it after the first teaser swat.

    So what’s in the spank that keeps me coming back for more?  Well it’s really about position and intensity.  There is so much more pleasure to be gained from this disciplinary tact from childhood.   This is not the wailing, crying spanking from your childhood designed for pure pain and obedience, this is the grown up make it ‘hurt so good’ version.

    Butt Primer:

    Your glutemus maximus is a nice range of muscles covered with a light or heavy layer of fat.  You want to aim for the muscle as the tendons don’t offer much but a sting and an ouch.   Always aim for the muscles.

    1

    The really good news is that our butt cheeks have a ‘sweet spot’ or a shelf that thanks to our creator creates a sexual stimulus from intense impact.

    2

    Where is the sweet spot?  It is the reverse shelf.  The space between the depth of the buttocks and the depth of the thigh.  That’s the location of the most pleasure in a spanking.  Too high up on the buttocks it stings a LOT, to far around the sides your spanking the tendons and bones.  Hitting bone hurts you more than the spankee or bottom.

    I like symmetry, so if you spank the left cheek four times in a row, the right cheek will be waiting it’s turn.

    Developing a rhythm when you spank is easier with music, find an upbeat song with a rhythmic beat you like.   Anticipation is part of the excitement of a good spanking.  Once a cheek is stimulated the pleasure takes a minute to realize.  So spank and wait.  Let the spankee get a moment to absorb the impact and let the endorphins begin to come to the aid of the pain with yummy feel good chemicals.  You can notice this on the bottom by watching how the cheeks relax after spanking.  Watch carefully and alternate between spanking, kneading and stroking.  You want to knead the flesh you’ve just spanked so it distributes the endorphin chemicals deeper into the tissue.  That will allow you to spank longer and more enjoyably.  Stroking the surface will send chills of pleasure to the bottom and when you have a good combination of spank, knead and stroke you can be sure you’ll produce the wetness that makes this play a great starter for sex.   A well spanked bottom definitely improves the penetration stimulus from any position you choose.

    So happy spanking. Check out this music video for some inspired spanking music from Bulgarian hottie Emanuela. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lCa9_5l-EGA

  • It’s Only Kinky The First Time

    It’s Only Kinky The First Time

    Hi there,

    When the creators asked me to write a column for Smply Sxy, I thought what else is there to say about kink exploration that you haven’t heard before?  Then it hit me, maybe you hadn’t heard what I’ve researched and learned from half a century of kinky play.   In Los Angeles, we have dozens of public play dungeons, nightclubs and private play parties to keep you out every night of the week.  It’s a weekly competition to do something new in the kink scene here.

    file2901246197549I frequently receive email and calls from people looking to explore that secret sexual desire that is just beyond the normal penetrative sexual experience.   I call it your ‘kinky itch’ that won’t go away.   We know that the way to mastery is through information and practice and with kink it’s just a lot more fun doing the lab work.  By expanding your erotic intelligence you grow a new set of intellectual muscles, intuitive skills, emotional connections and spiritual resonance.

    When you begin your exploration of kinky sexuality you pursue better health.  Psychologist Esther Perel in her book “Mating In Captivity” describes sexual fantasy as important and necessary to feed our ‘emotional hunger’.

    Sexual fantasy is like a dream.  Dreams are the subconscious way of communicating your emotions and issues in metaphor and stories that hopefully you can interpret.  Ignore the dream and they get stronger and can become nightmares or a repeated story that won’t go away.   Pursuing the ‘kink itch’ feeds the emotional need and curiosity your body is expressing.

    How kinky are you?  Well there are thousands of fetishes, some healthy, others not.  You need more than sexual drive to manoeuvre through what works for you and this column will hopefully be that guide and mentor along the way to save you from the bumps in the road.

    So your job is to ask the questions.  Send them anonymously if you like.  I’ll share the answers I have learned and also what I’m hearing, seeing and feeling in the dungeon.

    I aim to be pleased,

    Mistress Serene