A Guide To Rough Sex With Gigi Luxe
Sex is one of the most primal and natural acts we perform regularly as humans. Between consenting adults, it can be a forum for self-exploration both physically and psychologically. Easy access to porn and a more highly sexualized society have led to misconceptions and extreme expectations, but don’t let the double-edged sword cut you down! It is my hope for everyone to feel confident and safe in their sexual endeavors. Sex can be a great opportunity for intimacy, or just for fun! As long as everyone is happy and healthy, there is no reason to judge someone for their sexual choices.
I strongly believe satisfaction and happiness flourish in “GGG” relationships: those that are
“Good in bed, Giving equal time and equal pleasure, and Game for anything—within reason”
(More can be found here: http://www.salon.com/2012/09/12/science_proves_it_dan_savage_is_right/). If you don’t feel safe and satisfied during sex, something needs to change!
My Interest In Rough Sex
I started exploring rough sex when I found a partner with whom I felt comfortable and safe. I always liked being tossed around a bit in the sack, and it wasn’t until I first did more at his request that I realized how valuable this could be for me as a whole person. Pushing myself to try things beyond my comfort zone was exciting in itself, and still is — I believe there is always something more to explore.
Why I Love Rough Sex!
While it might sound counterintuitive, adding an element of danger or pain (safely!) to the pleasure of sex can heighten the adventure and elevate one’s pleasure. A rush of adrenaline improves muscular response and releases more dopamine in the brain, and we all love a good flood of these happy-making little guys. Released during sexual activity? Ding ding ding! We have a winning combination!
Before I ever thought about the scientific side of things, there was something in me that just loved it when a partner pulled my hair or smacked my ass while we were going at it. Not only do our brains and body respond positively, but these actions register as proof that our partner is fully enjoying the process. Satisfying our choice of partner is arguably the top cause of arousal in humans, and definitely activates our reward system (good tummy-feels).
I also love being able to let go of whatever worry or need to control that may be crowding my mind. After a learning curve, I know what I like and what to do or say to get the most out of any roll in the hay. Sometimes, this means not having to make any choices for a while. Other times, I’ll demand whatever desire comes into my head. Being rough and raw allows me to drop my inhibitions and interact more honestly in my relationships.
Types Of Rough Sex I Enjoy
I am willing to try anything (within reason) after discussing it with my trusted sexual companion, so boundary-pushing in general is an exciting aspect of our relationship. I never know quite what to expect! There is something that always gets me about being manhandled and thrown around a bit in bed. (Think hair pulling, proper choking, or spanking.) As for what I like right now, I’ve gotten into the BDSM scene. Being submissive tends to invite a level of physical roughness from my partner, though not necessarily.
Remember These Precautions Before You Try
- I always do some research into whatever new thing I might try, whether that means reading articles and interviews, watching porn, or letting my own fantasies play out in my head. Being prepared makes me ready for action and less nervous.
- Discuss any boundaries you may have before trying anything intense, to be sure everyone is on the same page. That’s my biggest rule: Communicate! Sex should always be enjoyable and safe! There is this strange misconception that in a heterosexual relationship the man has control of the sexy times, and the woman just needs to follow along. But what if there is something she wants to try or doesn’t like? Speak up, ladies! From what I know about men, most find it pretty hot when a woman makes the first move.
Trust your gut. Intuition is the strongest guide we have. There is a difference between getting cold feet and legitimately not wanting to do something. If you’re uncomfortable with something, make that a hard limit and tell your partner. Make it someone you trust. You are still totally in control of the situation. You can always extend or revoke your consent; why not try something new? Remember: anxiety and excitement are different perceptions of the same visceral emotion.
Gigi Luxe is an adult model providing digital sex work through various media platforms including sexting, tweeting, and live streaming. She loves connecting with people through her work and seeks out the finer things in life. If she’s not on cam, you can probably find her reading (books, plays, wine labels…) or hiking. Be sure to follow her updates for the launch of her new website, coming this summer! Follow Gigi Luxe here:
Images courtesy of Gigi Luxe
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