Sex Ed
Masturbation Month – Happy Handjobs for Couples!
Yes, May is International Masturbation Month. Get your hands out of your laps and cheer!
Now, I’m not going to bash you over the head with a dildo promoting the benefits of masturbation – there are people much more qualified than myself to discuss it therapeutically – let’s just take it as a given that pleasuring oneself is beneficial. Seeing as though masturbation is generally seen as a solo venture, what I’d like to do is make sure couples don’t feel excluded from all the awesome. So here’s some tips and toys that couples can use to incorporate masturbation into their shared experience – there’s probably no better way to learn more about your partner’s body. Over the last few weeks, my extremely tolerant Test Subject (TS) has let me apply all sorts of things to his penis. And first and foremost, he must be thanked for that – not all of it was entirely pleasant.
Thanks to the awesome crew at Sex Toys 24/7 (https://www.sextoys247.net.au/), we’ve been experimenting with products from Doc Johnson’s Optimale range, which I primarily found appealing for it’s focus on sexual health. The packing is simple and free of overt sexual images, which is a great idea in terms of attracting more female customers to engage with their partners in selecting male toys. The Optimale UR-3 Reversible Two-Way Stroker is a great example of this; rather than comparing pornstar pussies to get an idea of internal texture, the stroker has simple designs, seen easily through the frosted UR3 gel. With just a small amount of water-based lube, the smooth and textured sides of the stroker slid on comfortably. This is a fantastic toy for a lot of reasons – reversible, good value for money, easy to use and clean, and the storage box is a real bonus. It’s a good practical toy, that can lead to some seriously sensuous fun. The packaging boldly claims the stroker has an ‘Incredible life-like feel’. It’s certainly not life-like in terms of handling the cock itself – the girth added by the glove is substantial. I asked TS how accurate their claim was. ‘It’s actually very good… “lifelike”? I’m not sure… maybe with a warming lube?’ We never got a chance to experiment any further with the sheath as we discovered some splits in the gel. We plan on getting a replacement, so I’ll be sure to let you all know how the next one goes. What would have been an 8/10 dropped to around a 4.
On the plus side, the death of the stroker meant we could move on to other things…
We decided to check out some cock rings. Typically they’re used to keep erections stronger for longer, but we’ve found they can create a whole new sensual experience and really enhance the whole aesthetic of masturbation. Rings are relatively inexpensive toys, making their play value even higher. They can be worn around the shaft and/or scrotum, and you can even get double rings that will do both. You can find them in a range of materials – leather, jelly, stainless steel, rubber – but for couples play we enjoy using silicone – it’s safe, and easy to clean.
The C-Ring Silicone 45mm Thick is a pretty impressive sample. For a basic cockring, these are aesthetically and sensually very pleasing. We got the matte gun metal grey/slate which was a surprisingly nice break from the familiar shiny-black. The silicone has quite a lot of stretch, and even pulling as hard as I could, showed no sign of weakness. There’s enough give to go around the shaft and testicles comfortably, and package them up nicely. If you enjoy cockrings and find them comfortable, contemplate presenting your ringed cock to your partner one night – they really can enhance the man-junk. I was super appreciative of the extra thick construction and the velvety finish of the silicone which seems to give more grip – there’s no chance my partner will fall victim to another of my clumsy slips resulting in a rubbery snap against his shaft. Once it’s on, take some time to explore the new dimensions and look of the penis by watching how he handles it – the rhythm he chooses, the point where he focuses, how he wraps his hand. Don’t get too carried away – cockrings should be removed within 20 minutes of application.
If you want to upgrade to something a bit more exciting, you could give the The Optimale Vibrating Double C-ring a go. This toy is designed much more with couples in mind, and comes as a single or double bullet unit. We went with the double, which was lucky, because one of them went on the blink after the first use. I must admit, I’m not much for bells and whistles on my sex toys – there is such a thing as over-stimulation. (I plan on discussing this in an article soon.) When I unpacked the Vibrating Double I was really impressed with the guide supplied with the toy – it clearly explained exactly where everything went (with two rings in action, be sure not to confuse the shaft ring with the testes ring). For partnered masturbation play, the bullets are a fantastic addition. Hands can be used on the cock and balls to direct pressure to the bullet zones. Partners can share in the action, by pressing or teasing their own body parts against the buzz… This is a pretty cool toy, but it is one-size, so be sure you’re within range. You can check out the Optimale range here (https://www.sextoys247.net.au/catalogsearch/result/?q=optimale).
Happy Handjobbing!
Feature image courtesy of Shutterstock
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MisKnickers is a Melbourne-based writer and educator with over twenty years professional experience. Published in some of Australia's major newspapers and magazines, MisK also spent time as a scriptwriter for both film and television. Her educational know-how is a unique blend of her formal training as a University educator, and her own experience from many years running writing workshops. Several years ago, MisK turned her talent with both words and people toward the sexual, creating (f)Risky Enterprises - a website and business dedicated to celebrating sexuality through words, be it reading, listening, or digital stimulation. ;) As someone who loves variety (identifying as a gender-fluid, pansexual, switch!) MisK's passions are always changing, but her strong sense of justice keeps her committed to the sex-positive movement and striving for sexual and gender equality. She specialises in enabling sexual self-expression, improving communication skills, and inspiring confidence. MisKnickers loves interaction, so please feel free to contact her with any topics of interest, or personal queries.
Get in touch with MisKnickers via email at misknickers@gmail.com