SimplySxy

Tag: Safety

  • Exploring Impact Play in BDSM

    Exploring Impact Play in BDSM

    Impact play in my experience, is an activity where an implement is used to strike with force on a part of the body. I keep away from high risk areas such as joints, kidneys and any areas that are not protected by fat or muscle and mostly target the upper back and buttocks. An object used for this type of play could be a paddle, strap, flogger, cane, baton, whip or even a fist or foot. An implement can be made of a variety of materials including wood, rubber, leather, plastic, carbon, rattan, etc.

    Impact play is definitely one of my favourite activities and popular amongst my regular clientele. For most of those who visit me requesting heavy impact play, it is more a need than a fetish. One of my goals is to fill that need, and for my clients to leave feeling better than they did when they entered the dungeon, regardless of how much pain I have inflicted during their stay!

    A typical Impact Play process

    I aim to customize each session to suit what the client has asked for. There is no point whatsoever in having a set style for every impact play request, unless it’s a first timer. If I am seeing a client who has never experienced impact play, I will start with a warm up and increase the intensity throughout the session. I will stop on occasions to check in with the client. The first time with a client is never typical so I am careful and take things slowly.

    When a session involves impact play I will get information from the client about their past experience, reasons why they wish to receive, if they have any injuries, medical conditions, any medications , and if they wish for marks to be left on their body etc. A safe-word is put in place so that a client can halt a session if he needs to.

    There are many BDSM scenarios where impact play may be applied. Just to name a few: Head Mistress and student role play, Sadist and masochist session, slave training, general discipline to keep a wandering mind in line, and many more!

    In my opinion, the mind is the most important part of the play!

    Safety is the priority if you are trying it at home

    There are so many books and educational sites on the internet. On some of those sites there is access to skill shares and workshops run by BDSM practitioners. If you want to try Impact Play, attend workshops or skill shares, go to events and munches. There are always kinksters about who are happy to share skills or watch over you on your first time trying something new. Read from reliable sources and communicate well with your partner before play begins. Be sure that you understand what limits are, and just as importantly, what yours and your partners’ are. Communication is of great importance. With time comes experience so don’t rush things!

    I specialize in Corporal punishment, Latex and Medical play. I also indulge in many other activities so let me know your fantasies! Keep an eye on my site for my regular travel dates to Adelaide and Sydney. Read my profile below and visit my links!

    Featured image courtesy of Mistress Alex

    Have an amazing experience or tips you like to share on SimplySxy? Drop us an email at editorial@SimplySxy.com!

  • Mistress Sindy Skin’s Anal play tips

    Mistress Sindy Skin’s Anal play tips

    Ass play can be so awesome! Yay for butts! I’m very passionate about ass play so just a few thoughts.

    I’d suggest… Try it when you’re in a nice relaxed head space, not a space of obligation. Enjoy lots of delicious foreplay, with all parts of your body. Lots of kissing, skin stroking, feeling safe and sexy etc.

    Finding a position where you control how far and fast you are penetrated helps both mentally and physically.

    Use lots of lube (and then use some more). Slippery sexy fingers are a nice way to get your ass gently stretched. Start slower than you think and maybe want. Small rubbery plugs can help but I find a partners fingers are best as they bend with your body and partner can feel how your ass is responding. A sudden clench down on their finger will usually make them go slower. Did I mention more lube?

    If their finger/s is in you and it feels uncomfortable, stop and either dribble more lube over the area or slowly pull out. When you get to a point where it feels yummy (can take a few play sessions of just using one of two fingers – that can be really intimate and hot as well so enjoy that too), have him gently introduce more fingers, all at a beautiful slow tempo. If you notice you’re tensing up, take a moment to concentrate on relaxing all your body and breathing slower. Relaxed body means relaxed ass.

    When the head of a cock, dildo etc goes past the entrance of your ass it can go a little fast as the head is usually widest so once the head is in, its good to take a moment to stay still with just the head in you and let your body get used to that feeling. Breathing, relaxing, kissing, playing with your clit, lots of lube…yumm.

    I don’t use numbing cream because it can mask issues – if it hurts it means you could be tearing the anal lining and fissures are really horrible! Plus when it feels good we want to feel all the goodness!

    And finally, I’m a highly experienced sex professional, but not a medical professional, so definitely consult a doctor and sexual health organisation for the most up-to-date information about safe and sexy anal play. And have fun!

    I spend most of my time filming and performing in fetish videos and 5 minute clips, on a huge range of kinky topics. In some I am embracing my love for leather, like the one where I play with a butt plug I’ve been wearing under my leather pants. In others I dominate my slave and I make him pleasure me. Would you like to see me in a particular fetish film scene? Custom clip requests are very welcome. Read more of my profile below with my links or visit my website at http://www.sindyskin.com

    Featured image courtesy of Mistress Sindy Skin
    Have an amazing experience or tips you like to share on SimplySxy?  Drop us an email at editorial@SimplySxy.com!

  • Precautions for safe Anal play

    Precautions for safe Anal play

    It’s important to ensure both/all people are wanting the same thing in anal play sessions, and open discussions before the play commences is vital.

    If you are receiving anal play, think about your limits and desires. Are you wanting a finger to tickle the outside of your butt, and no penetration? You are allowed to say so. Are you wanting to work up to fisting and having an entire hand inside your butt? If it’s your first time being penetrated, this is extremely unlikely to happen, so know your limits and be realistic. Ten minute fising porn videos often have hours of preparation and the actor is likely to have years of butt play to have stretched their ass to accept anything bigger than a cock. Slow and steady is sexy!

    Thin surgical style latex or nitrile gloves (for those with a latex allergy) are great to wear on your hands for a few reasons. It can keep things cleaner, but also helps prevent fingers and sharp fingernails from scratching and tearing the butt and anal lining. Add lube and the gloves can be super slippery making penetration even easier.

    A thin sheet of latex known as a dental dam placed over the asshole when licking and rimming can help prevent disease transmission, and if you put a bit of lube between the dam and the anus it can feel lovely.

    I use condoms on all my toys used during anal play, like dildos, butt plugs, and anal beads. This makes them easier to clean and if sharing toys during a play session, you can slip the condom off after one person has used it and put a new condom on for the next person.

    Try to be aware of what you have put where – you definitely don’t want to put a toy that has been in someone’s ass into their pussy without changing condoms.

    After using sex toys, make sure you clean them in disinfectant and other cleaning products made for toys. Then dry them ready to store in your favourite sexy drawer or toy box for your next anal play session.

    Germ-killing mouthwash is good to have on hand after rimming someone to help kill off any bacteria.

    A dental dam (thin sheet of latex made for sexual purposes) is available from pharmacies and sexual health services. This can help prevent the spread of Sexually Transmitted Infections and bacteria between the ass and mouth.

    Cumming in someones ass is considered a risky activity, and condoms will assist in preventing passing diseases between play partners.

    I spend most of my time filming and performing in fetish videos and 5 minute clips, on a huge range of kinky topics. In some I am embracing my love for leather, like the one where I play with a butt plug I’ve been wearing under my leather pants. In others I dominate my slave and I make him pleasure me. Would you like to see me in a particular fetish film scene? Custom clip requests are very welcome. Read more of my profile below with my links or visit my website at http://www.sindyskin.com

    Featured image courtesy of Mistress Sindy Skin
    Have an amazing experience or tips you like to share on SimplySxy?  Drop us an email at editorial@SimplySxy.com!

  • Uncuffed: An Intro to Kinky Exploration

    Uncuffed: An Intro to Kinky Exploration

    If you are a curious beginner looking to explore the multiple facets of kink with your partner, whether that means buying your first set of handcuffs or acting out an intense fantasy, there are three guidelines to start you off…to get you off.

    Communication with your partner is crucial to having a good kinky time.  If this is your first time expanding your sexuality and testing your comfort zone then there is a lot to talk about with your partner.  It can be a little awkward at first to address these sometimes new and edgy topics, and that’s okay.  You’re allowed to feel a little uncomfortable.  Start out slow when addressing kink with your partner; maybe mention you read an article or an erotic story online about some light bondage and a blindfold and were wondering if your partner would be open to tying you up (or vice versa) with a tie or fuzzy handcuffs and blindfolding you with a scarf.  Sometimes it is easier to begin with small changes to your sexual routine to get more comfortable, before experimenting with more intense changes, like replacing that scarf or fuzzy handcuffs with rope or leather bonds.

    It also can be helpful to give each other a verbal outline of what will happen (at least the first few times) so there are no surprises that your partner may not be expecting or enjoy.  For example, if you are tying your partner up and then blindfolding them, explain to them how and what you will tie them up with, and explain that you can stop at any time if you or your partner becomes uncomfortable.  Talking it out is a great way to reduce any stress or nervousness you or your partner may experience during this new adventure you are embarking on together.

    Consent is also a critical piece of kinky exploration that ties (pun intended) in well with communicating with your partner.  Consent is so important for you and your partner’s sexual experience.  After talking to your partner about wanting to trying that light bondage, or wanting to be blindfolded for a little sensory deprivation if your partner does not want to try those things you need to respect that.  Consensual sex is the best kind of sex, and if your partner feels obligated or bullied into trying these kinds of things, it likely will not be enjoyable for either one of you and will not make for promising sexual exploration in the future.  If at first your partner does not seem too keen on the idea of incorporating these new kinky ideas into your sexual repertoire, that’s okay.  You might try showing your partner that article or erotic story you read that gave you the idea in the first place, or looking into some literature for kinky beginners.

    If after reading up on kink through articles, books, or erotica and your partner is still hesitant, you should respect that and just give it some time.  Let the conversation rest for a while, maybe your partner is stressed at work currently or is having difficulty within their family.  Showing you respect their decision and/or can wait for other areas of their life to settle down will show your partner you respect them and honour their consent, and may keep your partner’s mind open to consenting to some kinky fun in the future.

    Lastly, after you have discussed what you are going to try with your partner, how you are going to try it, and have received verbal and (maybe a little nervous) enthusiastic consent, you need to keep safety and sanitation in mind as well.  This basically means using safe products for you and your partner, and to have a basic understanding of the kinky toys you might try using before actually using them on your partner.  For example, if you are going to use handcuffs, make sure you know how to easily get in and out of them.  Or, if you are going to use any sex toys like vibrators or dildos, make sure you know what they are made out of and know if those materials are healthy for you and your partner (be aware of latex and other kinds of allergies).  After you are done using toys, make sure to wash and store them properly too for next time.

    A final word on safety; depending on what you are choosing to explore sexually with your partner, having a safe word may be beneficial.  Having a safe word, like “red” for stop or “yellow” for slow down, or something silly like “watermelon”, can give you and your partner confidence and security in your kinky exploration.  If what you are experimenting with gets too intense for one of you, you can stop whenever you want by using your word.

    Keeping these three simple rules in mind: open communication, consent and safety for you and your partner while you begin to experiment and broaden your sexy horizons, will hopefully lead you both to a healthy, confident, (kinkily) blossoming sexuality.

    Images courtesy of Shutterstock

  • How safe are my Toys?

    How safe are my Toys?

    A recent scare in Sweden prompted an investigation on sex toys after some were known to contain a toxic chemical called Phthalates.  There have been many reported cases in recent years of children’s toys containing dangerous chemicals especially those produced in China.  As China is the major exporter of sex toys, producing 70 percent for the world’s market, how are we certain that the materials used are safe for us to put into our bodies?  If you are thinking of purchasing a toy or already own one, here are 5 tips you should follow for your safety.

    Tip 1 – Buy “Phthalate-free” toys

    Phthalates are a chemical used to make plastics more flexible and softer.  They are banned in children’s toys but can be found in nail polish, adhesives, paint pigments and sealants.  The United States Environmental Protection Agency (EPA) classifies Phthalates as a possible human carcinogen (cancer causing).  Other studies have also linked Phthalates to infertility, reproductive issues, kidney and liver damage.  A Greenpeace-TNO reported that seven out of eight sex toys contained more than one Phthalates in varying concentrations from 24 to 49 percent.

    As no safety regulations currently exist for sex toys, packaging with “Phthalate-free” claims are unverified and might also be false.  Nonetheless, looking out for it is a good place to begin.

    Tip 2 –  Do not buy soft toys that bend

    Sex toys that are soft and bend easily are most likely to contain Phthalates.  This check is particularly important especially if the packaging does not mention the materials used in producing the toy.

    Tip 3 – Smell it

    If the sex toy smells “rubbery”, unpleasant or similar to that of a “new car”, take it as a warning sign.

    Tip 4 – Look for harder sex toys

    To reduce the risk of exposure to Phthalates in your sex toys, buy toys that are made from silicon, Pyrex glass or stainless steel.  Not only are these toys plastic free, they are also non-porous.  Non-porous toys have a smooth and impermeable surface that does not have any tiny nooks for bacteria to hide in.

    Tip 5 – Look out for quality through the branding

    As 70 percent of the world’s sex toys are made in China, chances are the one which you are thinking of buying or already own comes from there.  Beware of toys that are not of a household brand and are sold cheaply due to the low quality of materials used in manufacturing.  Brands such as Lelo, OhMiBod, We-Vibe, JimmyJane, Nexus, B Swish, Fleshlight ensure a high level quality standard for their products.  Your sex toy is going to give you all the fun you can get.  Do not put your health at risk as a result of buying a toy just because it is cheap.  Quality products are safer, last for years and leaves you stress-free to fully enjoy them.

    Be Informed

    Now that you have gone through our 5 buying tips, be sure to do your homework by reading up on the sex toy you are considering buying.  This allows you to shop at ease to protect your body and your money.