What You Should Know About Rope Bondage

BDSM is a form of escapism from the everyday grind of life for me. It is also a way I choose to form relationships with intimate partners. BDSM allows me to let go of inhibitions, societal pressure and stress. BDSM is about trust, communication and expanding of knowledge. It is also an amazing way to meet new, interesting and wonderfully accepting people.

How My Interest In Rope Bondage Began

I met a guy who was very into the rope scene at a swingers party. He took me along to a fetish event and I saw all the wonderful and crazy things everyone was doing. We started experimenting in private and I started attending my local peer rope. Eventually, I started exploring at events on my own and with other partners. Since I started as a bunny (a person who is tied) nearly 6 years ago, my interests and wants/needs have changed and I now identify as a switch (someone who can be both a bottom and/or a top during play scenes)

How It Feels To Tie & Be Tied

For me, being tied up is about freedom. Which sounds very contradictory. Being tied up allows me to be still and calm, be in the moment, release stress and sometimes if I’m lucky, to fly. It allows me to stop thinking and just be. Does it hurt? Sometimes, and when it does, being tied up becomes about challenging yourself and overcoming whatever the rigger (person doing the tying) is putting you through. The endorphin rush during and after don’t hurt either.

Tying another person is a whole different kettle of fish. Having someone trust you with their body and sometime mental and emotional state is amazingly humbling. Each person I tie is different and what they want to get out of a rope experience can change from day to day and person to person. My job as a rigger is to allow the bunny to enjoy the experience and get what they want out of a session while ensuring they are safe and (mostly) unharmed at the end.

Common Positions To Be Tied Up In

This is a more complex question than it seems. There are many different styles of rope bondage. If you are just tying a partner up for some sexy times in the bedroom the spread eagle is a common one. If you are more into western style bondage, you will often find hip harnesses and double column ties (rope handcuffs especially). Shibari or Japanese style rope bondage uses a takate kote (box tie) as the bases for many of its ties as well as futomomos (frog-leg tie) and hip harnesses.

Positions can also vary depending on if you are doing floor work vs suspension, are wanting a loving connecting scene vs a sadistic scene. Rope is a vary versatile tool and can be used in whatever way you and/or your partner is feeling at that time.

Introducing Rope Bondage To Someone New

For me, it always starts as a conversation. Asking a person if they would like to try out this thing I am into. Communication and consent are key with any sort of BDSM activity. If they seem keen to give it a try, I usually start with something very simple like a tie on the wrist or ankle, then work our way from there.

If someone asks me how they can get into rope bondage themselves as either a rigger (person doing the tying) or a bunny (person being tied), I try to point them towards a peer rope or rope dojo close to where they are. I think building connections within your local community with like minded people can only help you get better skills and more experience.

Various Ways To Kink Up Rope Bondage

Of course there are. Blindfolds and other sensory deprivation tools are commonly used with rope, as is wax from wax play candles. You can incorporate many sensations like fingernails, biting, kissing, spanking (with hands or impliments). Hot and cold with ice and warm oil. For something more extreme, and not for the faint of heart, I once saw a performance when the bunny/model had her nipple pierced while in a very tricky suspension. You are only limited by your imagination and what your partner will consent to.

Please make sure you ASK your partner before trying any sort of bondage or BDSM activity with them. Pick an easy to remember safe word like “RED” or “ENOUGH” and when your partner indicates that they would like to stop or uses your safe word, ensure you stop IMMEDIATELY. CONSENT IS KEY.

Rose Demore – Rope and bondage lover. Sweet and Sadistic. Poly, opinionated, and like to stretch and open the minds of everyone I meet.

Follow me on Twitter https://twitter.com/rosedemore

Facebook: www.facebook.com/skharin_kitten

Instagram: @Skharin_kitten

Upcoming Interview on podcast “In Bed with Bella”

Rope workshops with Little Red Mistress

Melbourne Tour Feb 8-10th

Images courtesy of Rose Demore

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