Sexuality is a spectrum, where we’re always discovering something new about ourselves and our interests. Kinks and fantasies form an essential part of our sexuality, and that is why it’s important to explore it further to be more authentically connected with ourselves.
A common fantasy is experimenting with BDSM, that is Bondage, Discipline, Dominance, Submission, and Sadomasochism. In this type of power play, two consenting adults engage in the role of top and bottom. The top is the one that’s more dominant and exercises control over the submissive partner also known as the bottom. There are many ways to engage in BDSM, ranging from the use of sex toys to ropes for inflicting pain.
In this article, we’re going to look at how you can safely experiment with BDSM if you’re new to it.
How To Safely Experiment With BDSM As A Beginner
If you’re a beginner to BDSM and want to experiment your interests with a consenting partner safely, here’s what you should focus on:
Prioritize Consent And Communication
Consent is the foundation of a safe and pleasurable BDSM experience. This means that both partners enthusiastically agree to engage in this form of power play but can also withdraw their consent anytime they wish to. Another important aspect of a safe and pleasurable BDSM encounter is to communicate expectations, information, and other important details before starting the power play session. This includes fears, desires, and non-negotiable aspects of BDSM for you and your partner. Prioritizing consent and communication will help you safely experiment with BDSM as a beginner.
Self-Reflection And Boundary Setting Is Essential
Once you’ve communicated your needs with your partner, and they’ve agreed to try BDSM enthusiastically, it’s time for some self-reflection. Why do you want to engage in BDSM? Is it because you want to increase intimacy in your long-term relationship, or maybe you’re curious about how it feels to control someone sexually or be controlled. Try answering these questions before engaging in power play to gain more from the experience and understand yourself better. It will help you to set boundaries and say no to things that you’re not comfortable with. Self reflection often opens up doors to explore BDSM as a beginner and can be helpful in boundary setting for both you and your partner. This includes setting boundaries in terms of acceptable and unacceptable behavior, as well as safe words
BDSM is an umbrella term. There are a lot of fantasies and kinks that fall under it. For instance, someone might enjoy getting spanked while another person may want to try a curvy BBW sex doll. That’s why it’s important to understand and learn more about your interests as a beginner rather than jumping straight into extreme BDSM that may make you uncomfortable. For exploration and learning you can visit websites, read books and magazines, and even watch videos to know what all constitutes BDSM and which part of the power play you’re actually interested in. Share what you’ve found with your partner, afterall open discussion is an important component of safe BDSM experimentation as a beginner. Being knowledgeable about your likes and dislikes will only make the process more fun for both you and your partner.
Pick An Appropriate Setting
Picking the right setting for a safe and fun BDSM experience is almost as important as picking the right partner. Whether you want to try BDSM for the first time nestled in the safety of your home, or you want to go to a hotel on your next vacation to add a touch of mystery to your experience, the choice is yours. Just ensure that you feel safe and comfortable in the place, and so does your partner. An appropriate setting can easily get you in the mood for something raunchy while the wrong kind of setting can put off the mood and add a lot of unnecessary pressure on you as a couple. So avoid that, communicate with your partner, find a setting that you both like, and start experimenting with BDSM.
Power play can be amazing and fun, but ensuring that you and your partner feel cared for after the deed is done is extremely important. Whether you tried bondage for the first time, or even engaged in some pain infliction, it’s essential that you and your partner feel connected afterwards, and know that you’re coming back to each other. Try cuddling, watching something together, sharing a meal, or talking about the experience to gauge what you and your partner found the most interesting and what didn’t work. This will strengthen your bond, make you trust each other more, and make experimenting with BDSM more fun in the long term.
It’s A Wrap
BDSM is a common fantasy of many people, and individuals of all sexual orientations engage in power play from time to time. If you’re interested in experimenting with BDSM, you should prioritize consent, communication, self-reflection, boundary setting, learning, and aftercare for an amazing experience. The tips given above are a guide through which you can make your experience worthwhile, so don’t be afraid to try something new.
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