Part 1 – Getting Started
You know me by now (don’t you?) so you will know that I don’t just operate at the physical level so expect the unexpected during this series of articles on Self Pleasure. After all, we can’t really get what we need from our lovers until we know exactly which buttons to press for ourselves first. Are you ready? Then we shall begin …
First and foremost let me tell you something … come closer… are you leaning in? I’m going to whisper into your ear: this series of articles—and all that I write—is for everybody. I do my best to be as inclusive as possible and if I fuck up, do feel free to get in touch and I will modify my work (and my attitude) accordingly. What often frustrates me about sex work, the erotic arts, sex education and indeed the world at large is that everything seems to be aimed at the mainstream. There is often the assumption that whoever is reading the article or leafing through the book is white, heterosexual, young, able-bodied, middle class (sorry, it’s the Brit in me), slim, gorgeous and either in a relationship or actively seeking one. One size does not fit all and I really, really want you to know something: you, are, welcome here.
Great to meet you!
Right, let’s jump straight in, firstly let me say something about masturbating using your hands: you might not have any or you may find it difficult or impossible to reach your genitals. There are ways around this which will become clear but I want to take this moment to introduce the concept of using someone else as your hands. If you are physically challenged, you might already have a PA or a carer and they might just be willing to assist you in this way. If they are not comfortable with this or you would prefer someone else to do it, do think about employing the services of a professional sex worker and do think about using aids and adaptations that can assist you on the trip into the unknown pleasures of masturbation … Matt-at-Lotus style 🙂
Way before we even need our hands (or someone else’s), I’m going to take you on a journey.
This road trip begins in the mind. Have you ever climaxed without touching yourself? I have. I have also climaxed lying next to somebody, fully clothed with just one finger on each others’ sacrum. This often followed a long, intense and stimulating conversation, period of stroking, gazing into each others’ eyes and/or just lying there staring into space either alone or with someone just feeling—really really feeling—the body in which I reside.
Can you feel it?
Can you feel that tingle in your nether regions? Are you surprised by the heat starting to erupt from the center of your chest? This is called getting to know yourself energetically (okay okay, I just made that up) and is always the starting point for great masturbation and fantastic sex.
I’m going to leave you there.
Yes, that’s right. I’m leaving you high and dry. Until next time. I’m such a tease …
NB: Please seek medical advice before attempting the suggestions mentioned in this article should you require this. Matt cannot be held responsible for any adverse effects experienced as a result of not taking this advice and this article is not to be used in replacement of medical, psychological or emotional support.