When I was younger, I had no idea what I wanted to do in life. Sometimes, I would say a family law attorney (because I grew up witnessing the horrible divorce of my parents and I wanted to help; I felt the need to do so). There was a time I would think that I would become a physiotherapist and help people with injuries to get them back on their feet, or I would imagine myself being an anthropologist and going out to explore the world of humanity and its cultures etc, or maybe help countries with political issues … you know what I mean. In case, you have noticed there is a similarity to all these aspirations: the dream to help. Why? To be honest, I have no idea and I simply feel this strong calling through my whole life to help others. But if you would have asked me about my life-long career and told me that my first steps in the adult industry would be in Germany at the age of 18 as a Dominatrix, my response would have been, “What is a Dominatrix?”
I had a rollercoaster lifestyle until I had my daughter and two years after finally figuring out what I would do or let’s say, what my heart had the most passion for. I did not end up being a full-time dominatrix for the rest of my life, but the brief period of my life in the world of BDSM has not only truly changed my view, but also the way the humans work. I was a dominatrix for about a year when I turned 18. I was living in Germany as a civilian then, attending school there and working on becoming a hairdresser. Sounds all pretty normal right? Except for the fact that I was a full blown punk (sex pistols style), politically active on the Left Wing movement and its many many protests throughout Germany, and had a deep passion for gothic electronic music dance parties while working as a part-time amateur model. Now, because I was active in the gothic scene at parties, this opened a different drawer in the creativity closet for me as many of the guests at such parties would wear tons of latex, PVC etc. It was not just any regular latex stuff you can get in your next door porn shop. No, we are talking about actual high quality dresses and suits (long before Miss Gaga and Katy Perry made it a thing in the pop industry). In addition, there would often be attendees and scenes such as older BDSM couples, women taking on the mistress role, hubby on the leach in short and very tight latex shorts, not to mention the very short shorts …
A friend of mine whose name I shall not mention but let’s just call her W. W was a model and dominatrix, and boy! she was one of a kind. So when life as usual every now and then takes a drastic turn, I quit my job as a hairdresser (due to major bullying within the company) and lost my apartment (because if there is something more horrible then standing 30 in line at a grocery store it’s dealing with government stuff in Germany like social help etc. That’s a major bitch and will take you forever. And so because of this, I ended up losing my apartment, job and a lot of my friends to move to Trier to stay with her for a while and figure out what I was going to do). Since I was making a bit of money but not enough to survive as a model, I decided that I needed a fresh start with everything. And that’s when W opened a whole new world to me.
She taught me everything I needed to know and just like that, I into the big world, moved all the way to Kaiserslautern and started anew with absolutely no physical experience. In a city that’s not only huge, but with a soccer stadium, multiple army bases and a lot of international tourism all going on all that town—I saw nothing but profit. And boy was I happy because I turned out to be the only dominatrix (even though prostitution is legal in Germany and trust me, there are more brothels out there then bakeries, and that in Germany trust me, has to say something). At night, I would work at a Table Dancer club and made a ton of money just for being American and being able to speak with all the soldiers who were looking for some fun. During the day, I would either model or offer SM sessions. As the session requests started flowing in like spam mail on MSN, I started to realize very quick how high the demand actually was. And armed with the W’s knowledge, I decided to use the internet and sign up to a very well-known BDSM community website in Germany BDSM community website. I interacted with other dominatrixes on tips and advice (don’t get me wrong; not many were willing to help a young fellow girl who was once in their shoes), but those who did seemed like the nicest people on earth. One thing every dominatrix has told me is that if you are not a lil familiar with psychology, you will have problems on becoming a successful dominatrix. I had no fuc*ing clue what they meant with this. So there I was on a Friday evening with some European spliffs, a few beers and Google (my best friend in the world) and started to dig much deeper into this whole BDSM thing. And the more I dug, the more I found out how much psychology has to do with our everyday life, especially sexually …
Stay tuned to tomorrow’s post for Mary Jane’s virgin dominatrix experience!
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