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Ask Us – Steve O

Kink

Ask Us – Steve O

I come from a traditional Chinese family and upbringing and am constantly turned on by the thought of my wife with another man but I fear that she might be offended and disgusted. How do you suggest I approach this? – Repressed

Mr. Repressed,

Many men let their sexual arousal and fantasies cloud their thinking but your concerns about your wife’s feelings shows that you are ready to approach things with a good balance between your sexual desires and practicality bravo!!

Yes some women might feel their husband’s fantasizing about them being with another man is a way of separating from the marriage or gaining their own sexual freedom in an open marriage.

I would suggest you think carefully about why you find the idea of being a cuckold arousing and then consider things from your wife’s point of view to see if you can find things that she would enjoy about such a lifestyle. After careful consideration you might come up with some ideas.

Also try purchasing some adult videos that feature “cheating wife” scenarios to watch with your wife.
When you do decide to reveal your kinky interest in being a cuckold to your wife do so only when she is sexually aroused and more likely to be receptive kinky ideas.

Is sex the only reason for a cuckold lifestyle? What really happens when emotions come into play? – Danny

Danny,

You raise a good point that I will cover in another instalment but it is worth going over here.

For some women a hot-wife lifestyle is all about breaking taboos by having hot sex with other men. These women enjoy “recreational” sex outside their marriages but nothing more. Other wives enjoy having a boyfriend in addition to a husband. They have one primary extra-marital partner and develop a “part time” relationship with him but there does need to be boundaries.

Some women actual seek out extra-marital partners who are married because these men are much less likely to want a deeper relationship.

Before a wife has her first extra-marital encounter it is important that the couple discuss “boundaries”. It is often advisable that the couple draw up a “cuckold contract” together where the wife and husband specify expectations, limits and requirements for both.

If you have a question for Steve O, drop him a question at our Ask Us page and he will gladly answer it for you.

Steve is a middle-aged husband and father living in the northern US. By day he works as a technical analyst/project manager for a large company by night he explores the depths of alternative sexual lifestyles - mostly involve female-led relations.

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